Road to freedom

[cookiemonster]

Hi everyone.

I've been a porn user since I was 11/12. I'm 20, almost 21 now. I am looking to cut it out of my life for good. Over the years it's had increasing negative effects on my life. I've never had sex and recently started losing erections even when watching porn, I've also had to escalate to more extreme content.

I'm something like two weeks into my reboot already. I don't want to count days and obsess over things like that. I'll simply post here when I feel like updating and I made an account to post on other people's threads too.

I'm going hard mode. No PMO until a later date when I'll hopefully have real sexual encounters and get some O there haha.

- cookie

 

[Fappy]

Hi everyone.

I've been a porn user since I was 11/12. I'm 20, almost 21 now. I am looking to cut it out of my life for good. Over the years it's had increasing negative effects on my life. I've never had sex and recently started losing erections even when watching porn, I've also had to escalate to more extreme content.

I'm something like two weeks into my reboot already. I don't want to count days and obsess over things like that. I'll simply post here when I feel like updating and I made an account to post on other people's threads too.

I'm going hard mode. No PMO until a later date when I'll hopefully have real sexual encounters and get some O there haha.

- cookie

No PMO until a later date

no PMO EVER! PMO means porn, masturbation, orgasm.
youve got to quit that shit so you can have successful real life encounters.

 

[cookiemonster]

no PMO EVER! PMO means porn, masturbation, orgasm.
youve got to quit that shit so you can have successful real life encounters.

All good mate, what I meant was later on I'm hoping to still get some O from real sex (a subset of PMO).

I'll never be doing the P.

Not sure about the M, is that something people reckon you should quit forever too?

 

[cookiemonster]

Also I'm going to say 3/12/21 as the approximate start date of my reboot

 

[cookiemonster]

I'm feeling urges to masturbate more than I am feeling urges to watch porn.

I've also found that my desire to pursue sexual relations with real women had increased. Not that I've been able to act on this.

What is the recommended duration range of hard mode before going out and trying to rewire?

 

[Fappy]

All good mate, what I meant was later on I'm hoping to still get some O from real sex (a subset of PMO).

I'll never be doing the P.

Not sure about the M, is that something people reckon you should quit forever too?

if youre doing hardmode then you should abstain from wanking for the duration. but after that if you feel its something you can control, and its not to any artificial stimuli, then sure. a good ole wank shouldnt do any harm

 

[Deleted member 22651]

I've never had sex and recently started losing erections even when watching porn, I've also had to escalate to more extreme content.

I'm something like two weeks into my reboot already. I don't want to count days and obsess over things like that. I'll simply post here when I feel like updating and I made an account to post on other people's threads too.

Im not a professional but sounds like it might be PIED (Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction) I went through something similar and moved onto "interesting" categories before realizing that porn was a serious problem and how it was effecting me.

When it comes to duration in hardmode, I think that always depends on the person and how your body and mind feel after a while. Every time I relapsed it took me a little over a week before I could get an erection again.

I like your approach to focus on other things instead of being focused on the number of days youve gone without it. It might be difficult (or not) at first as youre rewiring your brain to reove a habit that you've been used to for 10 years but take it all one day at a time, learn from any mistakes you might make along the way and you'll get through this.

All the best my guy!

 

[cookiemonster]

if youre doing hardmode then you should abstain from wanking for the duration. but after that if you feel its something you can control, and its not to any artificial stimuli, then sure. a good ole wank shouldnt do any harm

Thanks Fappy. Have you got any idea how long I should be doing hardmode for? I'll do it for as long as it takes but what will the signs be when it's time to transition to "rewiring" rather than just resetting if you know what I mean.

 

[cookiemonster]

Im not a professional but sounds like it might be PIED (Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction) I went through something similar and moved onto "interesting" categories before realizing that porn was a serious problem and how it was effecting me.

When it comes to duration in hardmode, I think that always depends on the person and how your body and mind feel after a while. Every time I relapsed it took me a little over a week before I could get an erection again.

I like your approach to focus on other things instead of being focused on the number of days youve gone without it. It might be difficult (or not) at first as youre rewiring your brain to reove a habit that you've been used to for 10 years but take it all one day at a time, learn from any mistakes you might make along the way and you'll get through this.

All the best my guy!

Yeah I'm 99% sure it's PIED, it was getting to the point where I'd have to be watching splitscreen/compilation videos and have multiple tabs open and still sometimes even lose an erection when watching porn. It's not all that surprising when you explore the underlying biological mechanisms, I'm amazed the medical institutions are so far behind in understanding this by the sounds of things. It's another pandemic man, we've got generations of kids (including me) having their sex lives hijacked by the porn industry.

Yeah that makes sense that the duration varies. Do you know what the signs will be when it's will be time to move onto rewiring? I'll look forward to it. I genuinely want to get out there and have a go with some real girls haha.

Yeah the idea of counting days is not something which appeals to me. The days are irrelevant, I'm going to do it as long as it takes and I think counting them formally will just emphasise the wrong things for me personally. I'm not someone whose life has been destroyed by porn, I have an all round pretty awesome life with plenty of things I'm grateful for and plenty of things going for me! I'd much rather focus on those and then take satisfaction as the weeks go by and I haven't relapsed.

It's funny, I've been so satisfied and happy for myself every time I think about the fact that I haven't looked for porn or masturbated once. I smile when I think about what I'm doing, it's been a long time coming.

 

[cookiemonster]

I actually started the reboot right when I left on a two week trip with my family. I was living in smaller places with my family during this period of time and it would have been difficult to find time to pmo, I used it as a way to force myself into the reboot process.

It really worked because here I am three weeks later or so still going.

 

[cookiemonster]

Something else which is interesting. As much as reading success stories is motivating, reading people's journals where they relapse is motivating too. I see it and I don't want to be like that.

There are so many people who are like "this is it" and then the next day they're like "relapsed".

I don't want to say "this is it" etc because I don't want to jinx anything. I'm just going to quietly work away at this thing and post here whenever I have something to share.

 

[cookiemonster]

I woke up this morning with pretty solid morning wood. This is at the end of week 3 of the reboot.

I've never had morning wood in my life (except for another time like a week ago during the reboot).

I think it happens when I actually need to pee and it's a tool my body uses to deal with that to prevent me from really needing to go while I'm asleep? I also think I might be touching myself slightly while half asleep to make it happen when I want to not get up and go to the bathroom?

Not too sure.

Anyway, super cool for me and positive signs when only a month ago I was having a hard time getting hard without porn and losing erections even watching porn.

 

[cookiemonster]

Does anyone know at which point I should transition from pure abstinence and rebooting to rewiring?

I'd like to consider it as something to look forward to haha

 

[cookiemonster]

Merry Christmas everybody. It's Christmas Eve here and 10 minutes to midnight

 

[cookiemonster]

I'm already enjoying the effects of the reboot and I'm only three weeks in. I haven't had such a healthy desire to meet girls and get a girlfriend in a very long time.

Screw porn man, what a way to fuck up some really good things life has to offer.

 

[Fappy]

Thanks Fappy. Have you got any idea how long I should be doing hardmode for? I'll do it for as long as it takes but what will the signs be when it's time to transition to "rewiring" rather than just resetting if you know what I mean.

I think you’ll just “know” when that happens. Everyone is different and there’s isn’t really a eureka moment when you suddenly see that you’re fine. One day you won’t even be thinking about porn or the problems associated with it, it’ll be non existent, then a few days later you’ll realize you havnt thought about it at all for a few days. Then you’ll know

 

[cookiemonster]

I think you’ll just “know” when that happens. Everyone is different and there’s isn’t really a eureka moment when you suddenly see that you’re fine. One day you won’t even be thinking about porn or the problems associated with it, it’ll be non existent, then a few days later you’ll realize you havnt thought about it at all for a few days. Then you’ll know

Thanks Fappy. Looking forward to that day!

 

[cookiemonster]

I had a dream about porn the a couple of nights ago where I was having sex with pornstars but stopped before orgasm (like my brain is aware I'm not meant to be doing that stuff).

Urges to masturbate and watch porn which weren't there before, have suddenly been strong over the last two days.

I also started playing some games on my phone which is something I don't normally do. I feel like it erodes my willpower so I've uninstalled them and am not going to play.

 

[cookiemonster]

Had another dream about masturbating to porn last night. Not sure what to do about this, I feel like I'm relapsing in my sleep.

Any advice?

 

[cookiemonster]

Some promising news. I'm coming up on 4 weeks no porn, no masturbation, no orgasm, no peeking.

This morning in the shower I tested my erection just off feeling. No fantasizing, just moving my dick around to see what would happen.

I got a 85-90% hard erection while standing up, just off feeling alone. Pre reboot I couldn't really get an erection standing up and would even lose my erection in the middle of pmo sessions. The erection this morning went away pretty much instantly after I stopped fondling around haha, but I still take today as a good sign!

I've also been getting morning wood which is something I've never had in my life.

I like that time is on our side during the reboot. If we simply don't pmo, time passes, and we heal. We don't need to worry about the time passing, we just need to worry about no pmo and the natural order takes care of the rest.