Road to freedom

cookiemonster

cookiemonster

Active Member
Day 88 clean.

I let myself down quite often in little ways. I have big ambitions but still struggle to control my mind. I eat too much sugar and let my focus be stolen away by games, social media and my phone. I'm working on these.

I have made it 88 days without looking at PMO and MO. I'm proud of myself.

The goal for today is another porn-free day. No porn, no p-subs, no engaging in activities which activate the porn pathways. I will not touch my dick unless peeing.

I had morning wood again this morning.

I'm a little emotionally depleted right now and sad.

From here on out let's keep making the right decisions more often than not and improving my life.

Porn is insidious. I'm still not free from its clutches but every day is a step in the right direction. Got to beat the other vices in my life too.

See you tonight or tomorrow, keep me accountable.
 
Androg

Androg

Administrator
Admin
Moderator
Welcome to being human. Mastering those powerful mammalian appetites is a challenge for us all. Be pleased with your porn progress, and keep chipping away at the others. You're doing great.
 
cookiemonster

cookiemonster

Active Member
Day 89 clean.

Partied all night last night and had some attention from girls. Importantly I had fun and enjoyed the social event, and meeting new people.

I was flirting with a girl and she showed me some graphic manga she reads. We also played a game as a group where you have a random photo from your camera roll shared and a guy had a porn photo shared from his. All good fun.

All of this, plus no action, plus alcohol, plus lack of sleep could have been quite triggering.

It wasn't though. I was way more interested in the people there and attracted to the real girls.

Fuck porn.

Rest day today. Just don't play with my dick or look at pornographic content finishing off this evening and we'll be good.
 
swimmer97

swimmer97

Active Member
cookiemonster said:
Day 89 clean.

Partied all night last night and had some attention from girls. Importantly I had fun and enjoyed the social event, and meeting new people.

I was flirting with a girl and she showed me some graphic manga she reads. We also played a game as a group where you have a random photo from your camera roll shared and a guy had a porn photo shared from his. All good fun.

All of this, plus no action, plus alcohol, plus lack of sleep could have been quite triggering.

It wasn't though. I was way more interested in the people there and attracted to the real girls.

Fuck porn.

Rest day today. Just don't play with my dick or look at pornographic content finishing off this evening and we'll be good.
Click to expand...
Sounds great mate, keep killing 💪
 
cookiemonster

cookiemonster

Active Member
I think I'm going to start another counter for overcoming social media and phone game distractions. I can start tomorrow by simply saying phone games and youtube are banned and using them at all is a "relapse". The problem with things like youtube and social media is sometimes there is a legitimate reason to use them like messaging or intentional consuming of content. Anyway, I'm just thinking I'll start taking overcoming distractions more seriously. The easiest one to beat is games on my phone because there is never any real legitimate reason to use them when I'm being honest about things.

See you tomorrow morning. Don't play with dick going to sleep. Just have to get through this evening, not forever.
 
cookiemonster

cookiemonster

Active Member
Day 90 clean.

Morning wood again this morning. I thought about playing with my dick in the shower but decided against it because I couldn't be bothered hahah. That's a big improvement on the compulsive porn use from 3 months ago.

I'm adding a new day counter to implement more positive habits in other areas of my life. That starts today by aiming to not play games on my phone. The goal is to just get through today, then maybe we can set longer and longer targets. I'm hoping these habits will be much easier to kick than a pornography addiction. I suspect they will be easier because I'm not as much of an addict and more of a compulsive user. I'm not exactly sure what the difference is but I hope you get the point. I have many things I would like to introduce into my life: healthier eating, meditation, a more regular sleep schedule, very little social media use and phone use, stretching each day and some more significant long-term goal alignment by working on the business ambitions I have.

For now we'll start by just trying to make it through one day without playing games on my phone. Achievable!

The main thing is still to stay porn-free so my focus will still be on that. But it's also time to make use of some of the freedom I'm creating to improve other aspects of my life too.

So the goal today is a porn-free day. No porn, no p-subs, no fantasy. I won't touch my dick unless peeing. And most importantly no blowing shit up just out of curiosity or because I can. The goal is also to make it through one day without playing games on my phone.

See you tomorrow or tonight to keep me accountable.
Day 0 no games on phone.
 
Last edited:
cookiemonster

cookiemonster

Active Member
Day 91 clean. 13 weeks clean.

Business as usual today. The goal is a porn-free day. No porn, no p-subs, no playing with dick. I had morning wood again this morning. Infinite morning woods at this point.

Feeling a lot of positive momentum and I'm excited that I now am adding the cultivation of more positive habits into my agenda.

Today I aim to not play games on my phone at all and to not use YouTube at all. One bad app/habit at a time haha.

Fuck porn and fuck the industries that hold us back from our potential.

See you tomorrow or tonight to keep me accountable. I mustn't get cocky.

Day 1 No games and no YouTube
 
Last edited:
Blondie

Blondie

Respected Member
cookiemonster said:
Day 91 clean. 12 weeks clean.

Business as usual today. The goal is a porn-free day. No porn, no p-subs, no playing with dick. I had morning wood again this morning. Infinite morning woods at this point.

Feeling a lot of positive momentum and I'm excited that I now am adding the cultivation of more positive habits into my agenda.

Today I aim to not play games on my phone at all and to not use YouTube at all. One bad app/habit at a time haha.

Fuck porn and fuck the industries that hold us back from our potential.

See you tomorrow or tonight to keep me accountable. I mustn't get cocky.

Day 1 No games and no YouTube
Click to expand...
Congrats @cookiemonster on three months, I didn't see that yesterday!
 
T

Trisquel

Active Member
cookiemonster said:
Lonely and sad tonight.

I guess business as usual. This too shall pass.

Don't fuck shit up. Go to bed and read and journal. Don't masturbate. Only have to get through today, it won't be like this forever.
Click to expand...
You are right! It won't be like this forever
Is just a temporary state, it comes and goes, and this feeling right now doesn't mean tomorrow will be the same.

I often have depressive mood, specially at night z when I'm tired after a long day (that influences you a lot, tiredness).
But is okay to be like that, there's nothing really wrong with it and it passes away rather quickly.

I'm improving day by day on not engaging with this moods, in accepting them and letting them pass, without loosing focus on my life.

Nothing you don't know.

Take care!
 
cookiemonster

cookiemonster

Active Member
Day 92 clean.

Pretty sure I had morning wood again and then went back to sleep.

Business as usual. The goal is a porn-free, p-sub free day. I won't touch my dick unless peeing.

I feel better this morning.

I did well yesterday with my goal of staying off YouTube and games. I didn't play games on my phone at all but I did watch one single YouTube video at the end of the day. Overall, a success. My time spent on other social media apps went up slightly so I was compensating for taking YouTube away but my total time was still decreased. Today the goal is no YouTube, no Facebook, no Instagram. If I spend like 5 minutes on them once my work day is over then that's a success. But during the work day, zero tolerance policy.

No phone games at all is the goal. That's an easy hard line.

Anyway, got to make sure my reboot keeps going well because that's the precursor to success everywhere else.

See you tomorrow or tonight.

No phone games at all. No YouTube at all. No Facebook or Instagram at all during the day, but 5 minutes after the work day is potentially acceptable.
 
cookiemonster

cookiemonster

Active Member
Trisquel said:
You are right! It won't be like this forever
Is just a temporary state, it comes and goes, and this feeling right now doesn't mean tomorrow will be the same.

I often have depressive mood, specially at night z when I'm tired after a long day (that influences you a lot, tiredness).
But is okay to be like that, there's nothing really wrong with it and it passes away rather quickly.

I'm improving day by day on not engaging with this moods, in accepting them and letting them pass, without loosing focus on my life.

Nothing you don't know.

Take care!
Click to expand...
Thanks for the support Trisquel
 
Ezel

Ezel

Well-Known Member
cookiemonster said:
Day 92 clean.

Pretty sure I had morning wood again and then went back to sleep.

Business as usual. The goal is a porn-free, p-sub free day. I won't touch my dick unless peeing.

I feel better this morning.

I did well yesterday with my goal of staying off YouTube and games. I didn't play games on my phone at all but I did watch one single YouTube video at the end of the day. Overall, a success. My time spent on other social media apps went up slightly so I was compensating for taking YouTube away but my total time was still decreased. Today the goal is no YouTube, no Facebook, no Instagram. If I spend like 5 minutes on them once my work day is over then that's a success. But during the work day, zero tolerance policy.

No phone games at all is the goal. That's an easy hard line.

Anyway, got to make sure my reboot keeps going well because that's the precursor to success everywhere else.

See you tomorrow or tonight.

No phone games at all. No YouTube at all. No Facebook or Instagram at all during the day, but 5 minutes after the work day is potentially acceptable.
Click to expand...
Man it's crazy. I noticed lately that our relapses always start with social media. Sometimes if you were in a low mental state as you scroll through social media and you see some triggering content without intentionally looking for it, it's like fire meeting gazoline that shyt could blow up at any second.
Moderation is key, and trying to not use your phone while not in the mood.
Congratulations on 3 months of freedom Monster. Outstanding performance.
Keep it up champ.
 
E

Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
Ezel said:
Man it's crazy. I noticed lately that our relapses always start with social media. Sometimes if you were in a low mental state as you scroll through social media and you see some triggering content without intentionally looking for it, it's like fire meeting gazoline that shyt could blow up at any second.
Moderation is key, and trying to not use your phone while not in the mood.
Congratulations on 3 months of freedom Monster. Outstanding performance.
Keep it up champ.
Click to expand...
Definitely. Social media is porn in disguise, right in front of us. I'm glad I don't use it almost at all however this is where I go sometimes to "warm up" for a porn session, because I let my porn addicted brain to convince me that "I'm not there yet, this is not bad enough yet." Yeah sure...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top