36, PIED, new plan

logicprox

Well-Known Member
Thats awesome man. 60 days is great. Youre doing great. Keep going. Have you noticed any significant changes/benefits?
I felt better mentally within a couple of weeks, for me I think it's just not going back and undoing that benefit more than expecting it to be a continuous up as time passes. There's a boost just from staying away for any period of time (I think) but the real long term benefit comes in what you decide to do with your newfound time and mental focus.

I feel more free and less beholden to a pointless activity that just saps time and energy. It let me actually learn to process emotions like an adult instead of running to a crutch. I wouldn't say I have gotten any sort of "superpowers" some people talk about. I just feel...better. Healthier. More interested in regular life and pursuing my goals again.

My PIED is still here I think? Hard to really say without testing it somehow ha. I think I am getting morning wood more than I did before I started these 60 days, but it's not daily or anything again yet. From most people i have seen talk about it, expecting PIED to reverse significantly in 60 days is probably not super realistic generally, though, so I will just keep going. It's not even really about the PIED anymore, it's about how much I hate porn and what it did to my mind.
 
Last edited:

Blondie

Respected Member
It's not even really about the PIED anymore, it's about how much I hate porn and what it did to my mind.
This.

My dick, was none functional a few days ago in the morning. Did I care, no, not anymore. I laughed, she laughed, all that mattered was that I'm not looking at that crap anymore. Staying away is the most important thing, because eventually, the rest will work itself out in the end.
 

logicprox

Well-Known Member
I am resetting my counter. I woke up in the middle of the night and made a series of bad choices that led to MO to Tik Tok. Not full on porn but honestly I don't think that matters at all, the brain pathways are the same. I will not make any excuses. My mind may not have been fully awake and on when the first choice was made but it was certainly on before the final bad choices.

I am disappointed. I am frustrated. I am even a little angry at myself. But I'm going forward. That same study I referenced in my last post found that an individual slip in trying to break or establish a new habit did not send participants backwards, they continued to progress as long as they got right back to it.

I know the next couple of weeks are likely to be harder again, some of the physical and emotional withdrawal symptoms I felt mostly past will likely return, but none of those matter because porn doesn't relieve those, it creates them.

My phone was off but of course I have a laptop too. I don't usually use it for porn, but here we are. Going to start turning it off at night too.

“No matter how far you have gone on the wrong road, turn back.”

Last night I turned and took a step on the wrong road. This morning I am turning right back around. I thought about it last night and this morning. What did I get out of doing that?

I spent probably an 45 minutes or an hour seeking, searching for the right clip. Did that feel good? No. It felt like a stream of frustration to be honest. The dopamine kept pushing me onward, to keep going, but it didn't actually feel good. The orgasm at the end felt good. But in the end, I was alone. The couple of seconds of elation, if I'm honest, wasn't much more enjoyable than the feeling I get working out, or working on music, or having a really enjoyable conversation with a friend. Maybe a bit more intense, but so fleeting.

The way I see it is I won 66 rounds against PMO, had it against the ropes, and in round 67 PMO finally landed one good, desperate haymaker. But PMO is still beat to hell. I can let one hit scare me and make me back down, or I can finish this loser.
 

Blondie

Respected Member
Logicprox, sorry to hear about you relapse. Your honesty is to be commended.

"The way I see it is I won 66 rounds against PMO, had it against the ropes, and in round 67 PMO finally landed one good, desperate haymaker. But PMO is still beat to hell. I can let one hit scare me and make me back down, or I can finish this loser."


This is the fighter spirit that will get you to your finial destination. You seem to have learned some lessons from this, that you are alreadly planning to put into good use for next time. Good for you. I only urge, if your mind starts telling you to feel bad, or to do it again since you just messed up, tell it to fuck off and sit in the corner, it is not in control! For me a least, the battle is the hardest right after fucking up than before, because now a breach in the wall has been made. Build it back up with positives thoughts and good habits.

You got this man, you had 66 days of glory to one bad day, that's pretty good odds!
 
The way I see it is I won 66 rounds against PMO, had it against the ropes, and in round 67 PMO finally landed one good, desperate haymaker. But PMO is still beat to hell. I can let one hit scare me and make me back down, or I can finish this loser.
Exactly - straight back on the horse! That in itself is surely a sign of true progress 💪
 

logicprox

Well-Known Member
1 day. But this time 1 day feels completely different than the last time I wrote that. This time I know I can do this. I know I am done with PMO, even though I just slipped up. I felt the emptiness of the action so clearly this time in juxtaposition to my life the 66 days prior. Porn doesn't relieve symptoms, it creates them.
 
Top