I am not a slave to my thoughts

Blondie

Respected Member
Two days in now. After interacting with Blondie on a different post I've decided to go for a week long streak just to prove to myself that I can do it. I will of course continue the reboot far beyond that. But for now having a fixed short goal might be helpful.
You got this. Anything is possible, if you put your mind to it.
 

Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
Two days in now. After interacting with Blondie on a different post I've decided to go for a week long streak just to prove to myself that I can do it. I will of course continue the reboot far beyond that. But for now having a fixed short goal might be helpful.
Yes, smaller goals could help. Choosing a long streak as a goal could sound scary. I remember when my best was 4 days, telling myself "I will go 90 days without jerking off" was scary as hell. I actually like to lower the goal even more, to day by day, like: "Today I want to end the day without doing anything stupid and tomorrow comes tomorrow." I don't know if I can resist a week without porn but I will make an effort to resist today. Little by little, it adds up. Good luck, man.
 

Blondie

Respected Member
Imagine how good it would feel to be able to say you went a whole week Escapeandnevercomeback without porn. You should try it! 4 days is pretty damn close. Porn is definitely not a need, and only in our messed up, backwards modern world would we think so. I know you could do it!
 
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Blondie

Respected Member
Two days in now. After interacting with Blondie on a different post I've decided to go for a week long streak just to prove to myself that I can do it. I will of course continue the reboot far beyond that. But for now having a fixed short goal might be helpful.
How you doing qubit? Stay strong.
 

nothing

Member
Ended up relapsing after three days! I was doing so well. No PMO thoughts at all. Just living life. Then I binge watched a Netflix show, ended up screwing up my sleep schedule and sure enough relapsed the following day. This was a big relapse because I ended up back at camgirls instead of just regular porn.

I think I need to take a step back and look at my lifestyle as a whole. I am the kind of person who needs a lot of structure in his days. Without the structure I get bored and my mind seeks stimulation.

Still looking to get to that week-long streak! I am going to start updating my progress here daily again.
 

Blondie

Respected Member
It happens my man, don't be too hard on yourself. Dust yourself off and keep going. Remember how good it felt to be free for a few days and hold on to that thought. Yes, keeping a schedule is very important in a recovery, I definitely know what you mean (speaking of which, I should get to bed). Stay on target, you got this.
 

nothing

Member
Posted my update on someone else's journal by mistake :p So adding it to my own journal:

Day 1 complete. Gotten through today. Was feeling some chaser effect from the relapse and ended up searching for porn. But didn't end up watching it. I am going to call that a win today. Of course in the future I want to do better.
 
D

Deleted member 22651

Guest
Day 1 complete. Gotten through today. Was feeling some chaser effect from the relapse and ended up searching for porn. But didn't end up watching it. I am going to call that a win today. Of course in the future I want to do better.

Relapses happen, best thing to do is to learn from where you went wrong and try to beat your last streak. Take it all one day at a time, stay aware of potential temptations and have a plan for when you get urges. It gets hard when you start again but it also depends on how bad you want to get over this and what it means for you to stop.

I believe in you my dude
 

nothing

Member
Hi everyone, I kind of lost motivation after a few relapses in rapid succession. But I've recently learnt a couple of new things that I hope will make it easier for me to get a week-long and then a month-long streak.

1. Some recent success in my professional life has given me firsthand evidence that sometimes it is necessary to live with discomfort for a while. In fact we should glorify discomfort because it's one of the most consistent symptoms of growth. This is true for rebooting as well. I need to attach positive feelings to the discomfort I feel in the first few days and constantly tell myself that the discomfort itself is progress.

I've recently been looking through the neuroscience/psychology literature on habit formation and habit breaking. And two big takeaways have been:

2. Breaking a habit/addiction takes about 30 days for most people. This is not true for severe cases where cravings might NEVER go away. But for most cases it takes about 30 days, the first two weeks of which are apparently the most difficult. I am not sure how well this meshes with the discussion of flatlining and so on on this forum. But it's nice to have a fixed number in mind even if it's a fuzzy estimate.

3. Doing something positive immediately after performing the bad habit/relapse makes it easier to break the cycle. For me this was originally intended to be prayer. But I never actually followed through on my commitment to pray after relapses. Now I have more reasons to do so.

Therefore, from today I am going to incorporate these into my next attempt at a week-long streak.
 

Blondie

Respected Member
Nice to see you here again qubit. I like your newfound attitude and perspective. Can't wait to see what you do. Stay strong!
 
D

Deleted member 26092

Guest
2. Breaking a habit/addiction takes about 30 days for most people. This is not true for severe cases where cravings might NEVER go away. But for most cases it takes about 30 days, the first two weeks of which are apparently the most difficult. I am not sure how well this meshes with the discussion of flatlining and so on on this forum. But it's nice to have a fixed number in mind even if it's a fuzzy estimate.
That's interesting. I always thought that 90 days are the minimum amount of days required for a reboot. And, that there will always be that area in your brain that could snap you back into the habbit immediately.
 
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