Porn is not an option

[Blondie]

That was a true laugh out loud.

 

[Nico]

Just read through your journal Blondie at GBS' recommendation, so inspiring and so much wisdom and good information in it! Thanks, and nearly a year too - congratulations thats a hell of an achievement

 

[FreedomFromTheStruggle_11]

Some inspiring stuff here. Thanks for the motivation!!

 

[Blondie]

Glad you liked it @Nico! There's a lot of good and bad days in there, probably kind of funny to read I imagine

Keep killing it yourself.

Best

 

[Blondie]

Thanks @FreedomFromTheStruggle_11!

I'm glad it could help a little.

Keep fighting the fight!

 

[Blondie]

I asked many dumb questions today in class and tried things I was unsure of.

 

[Blondie]

Day 347

Today I will continue to ask "stupid" questions in class and put myself on the spot when being asked. I hate that feeling when I think I know the answer the teacher is asking but I'm too scared to say it because I'm afraid of looking dumb if I'm wrong. In all fairness, I have been working on this one for a while, but it's something I still forget sometimes and I need a good reminding. I would rate myself a 6/10 on most days.

Today, if I think I know it, I'm going to say it.

Have a kick-ass porn-free Friday everyone!

Every man dies. Not every man really lives - William Wallace

 

[Onmyway19]

"But they must understand that the future, is paved with today and today and today."

Took me a long time to figure this out. We can only get to tomorrow by getting through today. Focus on right now and today and trust that will lead to a better tomorrow.

Keep kicking ass brother

 

[Blondie]

Thanks @Onmyway19!

Took me a long time to figure this out. We can only get to tomorrow by getting through today. Focus on right now and today and trust that will lead to a better tomorrow.

Yeah, that's something that took me forever to learn myself.

Best brother, and keep kicking ass yourself.

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 347

Today I will continue to ask "stupid" questions in class and put myself on the spot when being asked. I hate that feeling when I think I know the answer the teacher is asking but I'm too scared to say it because I'm afraid of looking dumb if I'm wrong. In all fairness, I have been working on this one for a while, but it's something I still forget sometimes and I need a good reminding. I would rate myself a 6/10 on most days.

Today, if I think I know it, I'm going to say it.

Have a kick-ass porn-free Friday everyone!

Every man dies. Not every man really lives - William Wallace

Dude who cares what anyone thinks? Most of the time others also have stupid questions, they just don't want to ask. I totally get it though, easier said than done sometimes haha

You'll master this Blondie. School is one of your big demons but every single person also has stuff they are grappling with as well, if that offers any comfort. You're not alone brother

Man, life was a lot simpler when you were a kid -- but we're not kids anymore, them's the strokes. But as an adult, the only way to keep feeling every year is better than the last is just constant self-improvement, and you're doing just that. Let's keep at it my man, I KNOW you can conquer this and in a decade you'll look back and be so glad you did it

 

[Blondie]

Thanks for your encouragement @First_step_thousand_miles!

I killed it today in asking questions in the class. I even voluntarily offered to have my work put up for all the class to see and critique!

I'm probably not as bad at this as I thought I was.

If I'm anything, I'm probably too hard on myself!

Thanks again.

 

[Simon2]

Of course you are too hard on yourself!
Enjoy starting to feel more capable and empowered in many facets of your life. That's what winning this fight gives many I think!

 

[Blondie]

Enjoy starting to feel more capable and empowered in many facets of your life.

Same to you Simon!

 

[GBS]

I thought there was something incongruous about Clint Eastwood showing his vulnerable side!

The penny has dropped. You’re not actually Clint, you’re normal like the rest of us

Keep going @Blondie - I am afraid there’s a lot of pressure on you. If you broke your streak I think some of us, me definitely, would think this is too difficult….if he can’t do it, what chance have I got?

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

I thought there was something incongruous about Clint Eastwood showing his vulnerable side!

The penny has dropped. You’re not actually Clint, you’re normal like the rest of us

Keep going @Blondie - I am afraid there’s a lot of pressure on you. If you broke your streak I think some of us, me definitely, would think this is too difficult….if he can’t do it, what chance have I got?

Hey dude, I get the gist of your post but respectfully, that's not fair. Don't put that kind of pressure on Blondie. The man is absolutely a wonderful human being & is inspiring, but at the end of the day we're all still human. Blondie's never pretended to be some elevated being either, if you read his post history there's plenty of vulnerability (which any real man has).

Blondie should get after it with no PMO for himself and only himself, he shouldn't have to feel the burden of everyone's expectations on him. Again, I get why you said what you said but it's also not fair to outsource all of our collectively responsibility to him. No matter who succeeds or fails in this journey (and I truly believe everyone is capable of success), the buck stops with each of us individually. At the end of the day, no matter who succeeds or fails I KNOW I will make it -- that's the attitude / hope for the future that we should all have in my humble opinion

 

[GBS]

Fair comment. It was tongue in cheek, andcwr. No offence

 

[Blondie]

Day 348

@GBS: I also read your comment as being a little off, but I figured you were just joking, so it only bothered my a little.

I'm definitely no god here at RN, I'm just a mortal man who has figured out how to have long streaks and to hopefully stay away from porn for good. If anyone had seen me before I started writing here, they would realize I'm just the same as you all, a regular guy who is working his ass off to fix his life and who has experienced many relapses over the years. What you guys are seeing now is hopefully my last battle with porn, but this battle is only 1/10 of the war!

I don't mind being inspiring - because that does keep me accountable - but I definitely don't want anyone to think that if I happen to fall that I've utterly failed, or that their goals of no porn is all for naught.

If you just relapsed after your first 10 days porn free, you need to know you're NOT a failure.

If you just relapsed after your first or third round of 90 days porn free, you need to know you're NOT a loser.

When the whole world is full of proudful wankers and us kings and queens are swimming against the current, it's only natural we're going to make a few mistakes here and there on our journey up the raging river. However it's the final destination that matters in the end and not the few whirlpools we might of got sucked into here and there on our way.

@First_step_thousand_miles

No matter who succeeds or fails in this journey (and I truly believe everyone is capable of success), the buck stops with each of us individually.

Truth!

Have a good porn free weekend everyone!

 

[GBS]

Unreserved apologies from me. Complete loss of mind. Came out all wrong. Begging forgiveness here.

 

[Blondie]

You're all good brother.

Came out all wrong.

It happens. I'm sure I've said plenty of things here that were not received how I intended it.

Thank you @GBS.

Let's keep fighting!

Best

 

[GBS]

Cheers.