Porn is not an option

Blondie

Blondie

Respected Member
I had a fascinating incident last night that I wanted to share with you all. Besides my questionable poetry that I write here, I'm also an artist, and I like to draw from time to time. Well, last night I went to a figure drawing session, aka, a place to draw nude models, and I wanted to share that experience with you all. I had done this last summer as well, but my thoughts and experience were different this time around.

It's truly crazy to say, but I feel as if the man I'm becoming is hardly recognizable in some sense to my old porn inflicted self. Yes, she was "hot", yes I had those thoughts, and yes, I did lust (she was a beauty) however, these were all just natural thoughts any normal man would have had, however, I felt in control and was in the moment and just focused on my drawing, and most importantly, I was NOT distracted. Nevertheless, the few times I did this last summer, the experience was far different for me. Although I still felt I was mostly in the moment, my thoughts were considerably more sexualized and I often had a hard time differentiating between the artistic part of me and the sexual part. This might not seem a big difference to some here, and that's okay, but to me, it was a world of a difference and I felt it instantly last night. One could rightly argue that art and sex, or passion, are often not that far apart from each other, and that so much of what makes the best art and artists great, are just the ones who are able to channel that sexual energy to its proper and productive ends. Porn is perverted because it subverts this God given energy and in its stead, creates destruction instead of beauty and order. Thus, rather than making a new beautiful baby, building a cathedral, or a work of art that inspires the soul in an upward trajectory, porn only leaves devastation and desolation in its path. One moves you higher and upwards, the latter lower and downwards. Last night, I sensed this difference in me, and it was beautiful indeed.

Furthermore, for the first time in my twenty years of drawing nude models, last night I actually talked and joked with the model before me. :) Sure, I might be shy sometimes or introverted, but no, there was something different in me and I think I know what that difference was, last night I saw her as a human being first and foremost, before I saw her as an object to draw. All those times before, even though I would have argued I was being artistic etc., there was always something that stood between the model and me, something impenetrable, and I now know what that unseen forcefield was, it was my shame and porn use all these years. But last night, there was no hidden anything, no hidden shame, no hidden desires, just a beautiful human being, and a man with a sketchpad full of beautiful curvaceous lines, but human lines nonetheless.

Porn destroys our very lives, yes, even the pleasure of drawing beautiful nude models.

There is nothing, not even one damn thing, that is good about porn, and the sooner we all understand that truth, the better our lives will be.
 
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First_step_thousand_miles

First_step_thousand_miles

Well-Known Member
Blondie said:
I had a fascinating incident last night that I wanted to share with you all. Besides my questionable poetry that I write here, I'm also an artist, and I like to draw from time to time. Well, last night I went to a figure drawing session, aka, a place to draw nude models, and I wanted to share that experience with you all. I had done this last summer as well, but my thoughts and experience were different this time around.

It's truly crazy to say, but I feel as if the man I'm becoming is hardly recognizable in some sense to my old porn inflicted self. Yes, she was "hot", yes I had those thoughts, and yes, I did lust (she was a beauty) however, these were all just natural thoughts any normal man would have had, however, I felt in control and was in the moment and just focused on my drawing, and most importantly, I was NOT distracted. Nevertheless, the few times I did this last summer, the experience was far different for me. Although I still felt I was mostly in the moment, my thoughts were considerably more sexualized and I often had a hard time differentiating between the artistic part of me and the sexual part. This might not seem a big difference to some here, and that's okay, but to me, it was a world of a difference and I felt it instantly last night. One could rightly argue that art and sex, or passion, are often not that far apart from each other, and that so much of what makes the best art and artists great, are just the ones who are able to channel that sexual energy to its proper and productive ends. Porn is perverted because it subverts this God given energy and in its stead, creates destruction instead of beauty and order. Thus, rather than making a new beautiful baby, building a cathedral, or a work of art that inspires the soul in an upward trajectory, porn only leaves devastation and desolation in its path. One moves you higher and upwards, the latter lower and downwards. Last night, I sensed this difference in me, it was beautiful indeed.

Furthermore, for the first time in my twenty years of drawing nude models, last night I actually talked and joked with the model before me. :) Sure, I might be shy sometimes or introverted, but no, there was something different in me and I think I know what that difference was, last night I saw her as a human being first and foremost, before I saw her as an object to draw. All those times before, even though I would have argued I was being artistic etc., there was always something that stood between the model and me, something impenetrable, and I now know what that unseen forcefield was, it was my shame and porn use all these years. But last night, there was no hidden anything, no hidden shame, no hidden desires, just a beautiful human being, and a man with a sketchpad full of beautiful curvaceous lines, but human lines nonetheless.

Porn destroys our very lives, yes, even the pleasure of drawing beautiful nude models.

There is nothing, not even one damn thing, that is good about porn, and the sooner we all understand that truth, the better our lives will be.
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A nude painting session, you really are living the college life! Glad you found yourself really evolving (but don't make it a habit of course my man -- these things can subtly creep up on you and become an addiction of their own. Just saying this with love). Great stuff
 
Blondie

Blondie

Respected Member
First_step_thousand_miles said:
(but don't make it a habit of course my man -- these things can subtly creep up on you and become an addiction of their own. Just saying this with love).
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I appreciate this @First_step_thousand_miles, I really do.

Don't worry, over the last twenty years I've drawn just as many dicks as I have women. 🍌🍌 :cool: I am truly an artists in every sense of the term, considerably more than I've ever let on here. In fact, my favorite session and drawing of all time was when I drew an exceptionally large middle aged woman. She had curves for miles and a great personality to boot, a true beauty. Although I wouldn't be attracted to her for dating per se, in my artistic mind, I've never drawn a more beautiful woman. I still think about her sometimes and definitely NOT in a bad way! What I was trying to say by this piece was that porn makes everything, even something as beautiful and artistic as figure drawing, sexualized. Thus, even though my intent back in the day was "mostly" artistic, and I always used figure drawing as a means to help in furthering my drawing skills, it was still colored to some extend by my porn use, and it was only last night that I realized this.

This whole journey for me is to learn how to properly engage with the world with a healthy sexuality: no games, nothing hidden, and no addictions or escaping from my problems. I came home last night and showed my girlfriend my drawings and she loved them. I told her the model was beautiful, her ass reminded my of hers, and that her breasts were smaller than my girlfriend's (all true) and that was that. No lies and no deceits, thus I felt good inside and like a real man. To hide this part of my personality or to deny it, would just as much send me right back into porn's clutches as if looking at porn subs for days on end. Should everyone do this? Probably not, especially if you're not an artist, but for me, it's a good thing and makes me feel in tune with myself, yes, even when drawing a man with muscular legs! But yes, if I do find myself thinking about porn or cheating with a model (like I would have a chance with that!) then I will assuredly back the fuck up and wait till things cool off even more.

Thanks brother.
 
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cookiemonster

cookiemonster

Active Member
Blondie said:
I had a fascinating incident last night that I wanted to share with you all. Besides my questionable poetry that I write here, I'm also an artist, and I like to draw from time to time. Well, last night I went to a figure drawing session, aka, a place to draw nude models, and I wanted to share that experience with you all. I had done this last summer as well, but my thoughts and experience were different this time around.

It's truly crazy to say, but I feel as if the man I'm becoming is hardly recognizable in some sense to my old porn inflicted self. Yes, she was "hot", yes I had those thoughts, and yes, I did lust (she was a beauty) however, these were all just natural thoughts any normal man would have had, however, I felt in control and was in the moment and just focused on my drawing, and most importantly, I was NOT distracted. Nevertheless, the few times I did this last summer, the experience was far different for me. Although I still felt I was mostly in the moment, my thoughts were considerably more sexualized and I often had a hard time differentiating between the artistic part of me and the sexual part. This might not seem a big difference to some here, and that's okay, but to me, it was a world of a difference and I felt it instantly last night. One could rightly argue that art and sex, or passion, are often not that far apart from each other, and that so much of what makes the best art and artists great, are just the ones who are able to channel that sexual energy to its proper and productive ends. Porn is perverted because it subverts this God given energy and in its stead, creates destruction instead of beauty and order. Thus, rather than making a new beautiful baby, building a cathedral, or a work of art that inspires the soul in an upward trajectory, porn only leaves devastation and desolation in its path. One moves you higher and upwards, the latter lower and downwards. Last night, I sensed this difference in me, and it was beautiful indeed.

Furthermore, for the first time in my twenty years of drawing nude models, last night I actually talked and joked with the model before me. :) Sure, I might be shy sometimes or introverted, but no, there was something different in me and I think I know what that difference was, last night I saw her as a human being first and foremost, before I saw her as an object to draw. All those times before, even though I would have argued I was being artistic etc., there was always something that stood between the model and me, something impenetrable, and I now know what that unseen forcefield was, it was my shame and porn use all these years. But last night, there was no hidden anything, no hidden shame, no hidden desires, just a beautiful human being, and a man with a sketchpad full of beautiful curvaceous lines, but human lines nonetheless.

Porn destroys our very lives, yes, even the pleasure of drawing beautiful nude models.

There is nothing, not even one damn thing, that is good about porn, and the sooner we all understand that truth, the better our lives will be.
Click to expand...
Beautiful.
 
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