Porn is not an option

OrangeSpider

Active Member
Thanks @Ezel, @Shreezy, @SmokenMirrors, @WestCoast and @downhillfromhere, you guys are great. I'm glad I could help a little.

Day 278

Well today is a big day for me. I've been working on a goal and project of mine for many years and today it's finally coming into fruition. They say hard work pays off and I can definitely attest to this fact. I'm so happy and proud of myself for putting in the effort these last four or five years and seeing what can happen when you put your shit behind you (mostly) and get on with life and your goals. And if you're wondering what I'm talking about, yes, the shit I'm talking about is porn.

At the end of this year I'll be turning 40 which is crazy to believe! But I want to let you all know that it's never too late to start or quit this shit and move on with your life. I see a lot of people worrying and anxious that it's too late because they're 30, 35 or even late 20s, but it's simply not true, it's never too late to start. I was a little over 35 when I decided to officially quit porn and today my world is completely different than it was then. Although it hasn't been a perfect run, I've had my relapses here and there, the amount of time and focus I've been able to achieve is only because of that simple decision back in April 18th 2018.

So if you're kicking yourself and feeling blue because you think your life is over at 30 something, I'm living proof that your life CAN be turned around! Thus, don't listen to those stupid thoughts running around in your head or society or whatever. Be yourself, accept it and move on with your life. You got this! And if you're older, then the same applies to you. I would rather die with five years of peace behind me than die a wanker, knowing I gave it all for nothing. It's never too late to make a change and turn your life around!

I'll be missing in action here at RN for the next few weeks, I'll just be too busy to write much or respond. I'll probably still post my days though because that keeps me accountable, but who knows, maybe not. There's a part of me that thinks if I don't post my days, I might screw up, and I think I might want to test that and prove to myself that that isn't so. Needless to say, I won't have time to post on anyone else's wall, but please know that I'm with you all in spirit. I will definitely be back, it's not time for me to leave yet.

I wrote this poem when I first started writing here six months ago. It encapsulates everything I wrote here today. Quitting porn is just the beginning of this journey, because in the end, it's about finding your true self and starting a new life.

Anyone can refrain from porn for 90 days,
all it takes is resolve and a little action.
But to accept life on its own terms for the rest of one's days,
takes everything you have, with no strong reactions.
It requires a new paradigm shift, a new way of thinking,
because real life is no five hour dopamine high in the making!
They say absence makes the heart grow stronger,
but abstinence from porn often makes the brain scream "No longer!"
This is why it's incumbent on us to completely change our lives,
so that we no longer hear porn's knocking, nor realize it even survives.
To quit is a great thing, but to completely change one's life, is even more desirable,
because at the end of the day, we must know, deep in our hearts, that a new life is acquirable.



This is a great community, we all got this!

Best

Blondie
Thank you for this.
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Well-Known Member
Thanks @Ezel, @Shreezy, @SmokenMirrors, @WestCoast and @downhillfromhere, you guys are great. I'm glad I could help a little.

Day 278

Well today is a big day for me. I've been working on a goal and project of mine for many years and today it's finally coming into fruition. They say hard work pays off and I can definitely attest to this fact. I'm so happy and proud of myself for putting in the effort these last four or five years and seeing what can happen when you put your shit behind you (mostly) and get on with life and your goals. And if you're wondering what I'm talking about, yes, the shit I'm talking about is porn.

At the end of this year I'll be turning 40 which is crazy to believe! But I want to let you all know that it's never too late to start or quit this shit and move on with your life. I see a lot of people worrying and anxious that it's too late because they're 30, 35 or even late 20s, but it's simply not true, it's never too late to start. I was a little over 35 when I decided to officially quit porn and today my world is completely different than it was then. Although it hasn't been a perfect run, I've had my relapses here and there, the amount of time and focus I've been able to achieve is only because of that simple decision back in April 18th 2018.

So if you're kicking yourself and feeling blue because you think your life is over at 30 something, I'm living proof that your life CAN be turned around! Thus, don't listen to those stupid thoughts running around in your head or society or whatever. Be yourself, accept it and move on with your life. You got this! And if you're older, then the same applies to you. I would rather die with five years of peace behind me than die a wanker, knowing I gave it all for nothing. It's never too late to make a change and turn your life around!

I'll be missing in action here at RN for the next few weeks, I'll just be too busy to write much or respond. I'll probably still post my days though because that keeps me accountable, but who knows, maybe not. There's a part of me that thinks if I don't post my days, I might screw up, and I think I might want to test that and prove to myself that that isn't so. Needless to say, I won't have time to post on anyone else's wall, but please know that I'm with you all in spirit. I will definitely be back, it's not time for me to leave yet.

I wrote this poem when I first started writing here six months ago. It encapsulates everything I wrote here today. Quitting porn is just the beginning of this journey, because in the end, it's about finding your true self and starting a new life.

Anyone can refrain from porn for 90 days,
all it takes is resolve and a little action.
But to accept life on its own terms for the rest of one's days,
takes everything you have, with no strong reactions.
It requires a new paradigm shift, a new way of thinking,
because real life is no five hour dopamine high in the making!
They say absence makes the heart grow stronger,
but abstinence from porn often makes the brain scream "No longer!"
This is why it's incumbent on us to completely change our lives,
so that we no longer hear porn's knocking, nor realize it even survives.
To quit is a great thing, but to completely change one's life, is even more desirable,
because at the end of the day, we must know, deep in our hearts, that a new life is acquirable.



This is a great community, we all got this!

Best

Blondie
hey Blondie, no rush as I know you're busy but you mentioned your life is totally different from when you initially vowed to quit P. What are the biggest improvements / benefits / positives you've noticed now that you have the perspective from it all?
 
Love the quote and 100% agree with it. It's truly when we decide to stop running away from our fears and troubles that we find our victories rather than our failures. To face one's fear never easy especially if its P in our case but in the end it will be rewardfull.
Thanks for the encouraging words and helping out as much as you can to everyone on this journey.
All the best as well
 

Blondie

Respected Member
Well... today went to shit.

This morning I wrote that quote above with the intent to push through my fears of socializing etc. but it looks like I'm going to have to face another fear for a while- loneliness.

For the last few days I was living in a dream, doing what I said I was going to do, however, this morning I tested positive for Covid, thus, I'll be spending my time in a foreign country, in a lonely hotel room with only the internet, my laptop and a few books to keep me entertained. Not exactly an ideal situation for many obvious reasons.

To put it bluntly, I'm devastated. I've worked so hard for this and it all went to hell and a handbasket - and what's worse I can't do anything about it! All I can do is be positive and take charge of what I can control - my thoughts.

Fortunately, at this moment the symptoms don't feel too bad (a light cold) which is great, it's just being cooped up in here with nothing to do and feeling very down and depressed that is the challenge at the moment.

I'm going to have to come up with a plan or goal to keep myself busy, then, just dive into it with all my heart and keep busy for 12 hours a day- maybe I could learn the local language or something.

Life's a bitch sometimes... however

Porn is not an Option - It's as simple as that.

I got nothing more to write at this moment.

Fuck porn and fuck this situation!
 

downhillfromhere

Well-Known Member
Damn man, that sucks! But like you say, sometimes the only thing you can control is your own thoughts, how to react and deal with what’s thrown your way.

You’ve got this, I know it! Learning the language might be a great idea, are you able to go out for a bit and interact with people from a distance?
 

SmokenMirrors

Well-Known Member
You'll smash it as always brother! I know you've got this! Could you perhaps request a book from the hotel staff? They could just leave it outside the door for you so you won't need to make contact!
 

Recovery Will Come

Active Member
You’ll overcome it you got this man!!! Definitely agree with Smoken about getting books to read during that time… You’ve made legendary process I can’t even imagine… Can’t let a overhyped virus to stop all those blood sweat and tears you’ve made on your journey… If nothing else God is with you and wants you to succeed and push through it!! You’ll come out even stronger on the other side.. God bless and keep on trucking
 
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