Finally, I'm doing this…
- Thread starter Ezel
- Start date
FreedomFromTheStruggle_11
Well-Known Member
Have a good day, bro. You've got this.
FreedomFromTheStruggle_11
Well-Known Member
How are you doing, bro?
FreedomFromTheStruggle_11
Well-Known Member
Awesome to hear that, man!
Ezel
Respected Member
day 34.
hey @Blondie good to hear from you my friend. man you checked in on the right time as always. i had some massive urges this day, but i managed to push through. i'm getting myself busy as mush as possible, training cali, fasting 2 days, studying, college, improving myself...
but sometimes it can backfire, especially when i get stressed, so my brain looks for that cheap dopamine hit to forget about it and numb itself.
luckily today i did remind myself what's on stake if i took the easy way out, this master's degree i'm working on, and all the training at the gym and the semen that's been accumulating inside my body so it may possibly heal me in one way or another, i still get wet dreams, man one night i had maybe 3 or 2 wet dreams in a row, i don't know what that was about. i don't even recall the dream that got my body to act like that.
my dreams are still unclear so there is still a lot of work to be done.
this is just the tip of the iceberg, a lot has been going on lately. thank you for stopping by champ. keep doing your thing
hey @Blondie good to hear from you my friend. man you checked in on the right time as always. i had some massive urges this day, but i managed to push through. i'm getting myself busy as mush as possible, training cali, fasting 2 days, studying, college, improving myself...
but sometimes it can backfire, especially when i get stressed, so my brain looks for that cheap dopamine hit to forget about it and numb itself.
luckily today i did remind myself what's on stake if i took the easy way out, this master's degree i'm working on, and all the training at the gym and the semen that's been accumulating inside my body so it may possibly heal me in one way or another, i still get wet dreams, man one night i had maybe 3 or 2 wet dreams in a row, i don't know what that was about. i don't even recall the dream that got my body to act like that.
my dreams are still unclear so there is still a lot of work to be done.
this is just the tip of the iceberg, a lot has been going on lately. thank you for stopping by champ. keep doing your thing
Blondie
Respected Member
Hey @Ezel. Great to hear that college is going great.
Love you man,
Blondie
It's okay brother. Your making great strides in your life, which is a big part of solving this problem in the long run. I think you and I are alike when it comes to the thought process that it's either on or off with no in-between, but there is a great difference looking at porn here and there, and all the time, like we both used to do. The former is considerably better. One day at a time. I don't know if you've read Atomic Habits before, but I started reading it, and think it's pretty great. I wrote a little post about it on my thread if you wish to get a feel for it.
Love you man,
Blondie
Ezel
Respected Member
oh man, you're right about having the same thought process. i'm actually reading atomic habits, and it's been an interesting read.
Blondie
Respected Member
Great to hear! I can't wait to hear what you think about it. I'll share more as I read it.
Love yourself. Stay positive. Keep kicking ass.
FreedomFromTheStruggle_11
Well-Known Member
@Ezel You've got this, bro!!
Ezel
Respected Member
hey sir, it is good to hear from you. well, actually i'm still struggling man...
i have read atomic habits which was a big revelation for me, i have learned that my environment is a big part of my latest relapses, wherever i go inside the house some trigger comes up, it's really though man.
i'm 26 yo, and sometimes i feel like my life is slipping through my fingers, it's a horrible feeling.
anyway, thanks for checking in. keep going sir. you inspire big time.
i have read atomic habits which was a big revelation for me, i have learned that my environment is a big part of my latest relapses, wherever i go inside the house some trigger comes up, it's really though man.
i'm 26 yo, and sometimes i feel like my life is slipping through my fingers, it's a horrible feeling.
anyway, thanks for checking in. keep going sir. you inspire big time.
Blondie
Respected Member
Hey brother, I sorry to hear you're "still struggling," however, it's great to hear you've read that book. From what I gathered from that book, is that habit change is a long process, and there's no such thing as a "perfect" conversion from your old self to your new self. Sure, there's always some great recovery story that would say otherwise, but for the rest of us, it's a day by day process, and that's okay, as long as we're not fooling ourselves and becoming complacent.
Are you the man you were three years ago? From what I can tell, you're NOT. You're in graduate school. You're studying something really hard. You're mostly clean compared to whacking it everyday like your old self. You're at the very least a 50% better man than you were before, and that's being extremely conservative. THAT is what the book is about and NOT a 'perfect' over the night transformation that is just as fantastical as the women in our porn consumption.
Maybe that's the problem with us post addicts, we bring our fantasies into our recoveries, thinking a click of a mouse will solve our problems as before (or maybe a new book or motivation), and then we get disappointed when that one picture or book isn't enough, and we start all over again looking for the "perfect" fix this time. Reality and porn addiction do not mix together, and that is our main problem. Perhaps we're still living in fantasyland, even in our recoveries with the best of intentions.
You got this man, you really do.
As regards to you being triggered at the house, perhaps just live on the streets!
Best @Ezel.
Love
Are you the man you were three years ago? From what I can tell, you're NOT. You're in graduate school. You're studying something really hard. You're mostly clean compared to whacking it everyday like your old self. You're at the very least a 50% better man than you were before, and that's being extremely conservative. THAT is what the book is about and NOT a 'perfect' over the night transformation that is just as fantastical as the women in our porn consumption.
Maybe that's the problem with us post addicts, we bring our fantasies into our recoveries, thinking a click of a mouse will solve our problems as before (or maybe a new book or motivation), and then we get disappointed when that one picture or book isn't enough, and we start all over again looking for the "perfect" fix this time. Reality and porn addiction do not mix together, and that is our main problem. Perhaps we're still living in fantasyland, even in our recoveries with the best of intentions.
You got this man, you really do.
As regards to you being triggered at the house, perhaps just live on the streets!
Best @Ezel.
Love
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