particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 35 of not using porn
Thanks @Blondie! Agree time off screen is good
Unfortunately that's tough in my day to day work - but something to remember whenever free
Not so good day today
First day working again - focus low
Ended up watching youtube. Definite step backwards for me. Wasn't tracking it but I hadn't watched it for prob at least 2 months
Started off with legitimate interest videos (music, guitars) but ended up watching some vids of women dancing
Obviously no nudity and no MO so not counting as a relapse but definitely dangerous behavior
Probably connected to stress from return to work, but also realized that lately I have been focusing too much on NOT watching porn
But have let the POSITIVE aspect of recovery slip
E.g. stopped thinking about stoicism, self-improvement, etc. (even though I recently said I would mix it with recovery work)
Spending some time outside with wife tomorrow, so will use it as an opportunity to "recenter"
Did my reading/recovery work/chinups
Stay strong RN community. So easy to get dragged back into this nonsense. Ever vigilant
Thanks @Blondie! Agree time off screen is good
Unfortunately that's tough in my day to day work - but something to remember whenever free
Not so good day today
First day working again - focus low
Ended up watching youtube. Definite step backwards for me. Wasn't tracking it but I hadn't watched it for prob at least 2 months
Started off with legitimate interest videos (music, guitars) but ended up watching some vids of women dancing
Obviously no nudity and no MO so not counting as a relapse but definitely dangerous behavior
Probably connected to stress from return to work, but also realized that lately I have been focusing too much on NOT watching porn
But have let the POSITIVE aspect of recovery slip
E.g. stopped thinking about stoicism, self-improvement, etc. (even though I recently said I would mix it with recovery work)
Spending some time outside with wife tomorrow, so will use it as an opportunity to "recenter"
Did my reading/recovery work/chinups
Stay strong RN community. So easy to get dragged back into this nonsense. Ever vigilant