To always start again

viking1234

Active Member
Day 11.
Everything good so far. Hiking to see the last sun. Quite a bit of work but still finding time to relax. Now I'm really really horny, but still managing to stay clear of PMO. About to try some sex therapy app with my GF, with whom as mentioned we never coincide...
Viking
 

byebye

Member
You had so many in and outs but you are still trying to stop it. It's hard to do it with so many triggers around you but you will be successful. Keep trying
 

viking1234

Active Member
Alrighty...
Long time no see. Again, travelling quite a lot with long days, barely time for anything.
Had my longest streak in the past year maybe: 16 days. Then I relapsed, had another 4 day streak and relapsed today.
Feeling a bit down but still feels like progress in a way. 16 days!
Starting over again.
Viking
 

viking1234

Active Member
Day 0 today. Watched a bit of P after 9 days.
I think I have a big vitamin D deficiency with the lack of sun, so I was/am having big mood swings yesterday, which led to PMO. Feeling quite depressed, so I'll checking my levels with the doctor today and might be that I need to take even more supplements.
Either it's the lack of sun or the less amount of PMO that's giving the mood swings, body aches, sadness and general anxiety....
Anybody has experience with this?
Viking
 

viking1234

Active Member
Watched some yesterday.
I've been feeling quite low lately, still do. Yesterday I had a bit of insomnia and was really excited (had other things in my head) so it was hard to fall asleep.
I don't enjoy anything as I used to. Let's see what the blood check results give back, maybe I'm missing some vitamins, but who knows, might be porn as well.
I want to change my life, once and for all!
Viking
 

viking1234

Active Member
Relapsed again.
I went from loads of work to loads of free time, and this happens when I'm bored...
I have to pull myself together and keep moving on!
Viking
 

viking1234

Active Member
Ok, last week I've been a total mess. Watched 4 days and managed not to finish, then again and again.
I just relapsed for the second time this week and feels like I'm back in square one.
Viking
 

viking1234

Active Member
After yesterday's 134697914 relapse, I decided I'm going to take this sh seriously. No more smartphone (even with blockers, I know the workaround), meditating 15 min per day whenever possible as a start. Not counting the days but really trying to make it work without thinking 'oh, it's day 4, now it's close'
Cheers
 

viking1234

Active Member
Alrighty - pretty rough week. Managed 4 days without anything, a bit of browsing today + starting things but NO! I will overcome this.
Trying to meditate every day, so far I couldn't do it the one day.
Need. To. Be. Strong.
 

viking1234

Active Member
Well... Again, day 0
I try to take this seriously, but it feels like I have zero willpower.
I'm gonna keep trying, always. But still... How do I manage this?
 

viking1234

Active Member
Well, it's been a while...
and it's been a rollercoaster.
I'm taking a chance and I'm trying to change careers on top of working a lot - that's been quite stressful.
Unfortunately PMO almost every week for the past month. I'm trying to stay away from the phone and manage quite OK but if I'm tired it's super hard to hold my awareness and stop myself from doing any sh**.

I'm not giving up though... I don't know how much my word is worth anymore because every time I say 'not anymore' I still do it. At least I know I'll try and keep trying all my life if that's necessary.
Viking
 

viking1234

Active Member
Again, I do a first post and then I'm gone...
no excuses this time.
Kind of good news, not sure? I've had two seven days streak, which is more than I was doing before. I guess it's progress?
Will try to be in touch and accountable a bit more than the last time.

Viking
 

viking1234

Active Member
My my my...
again some days went by without posts from my side.
Bad.
Had a four days streak and then relapsed :(
I'm having a bit more conscience of the moment through meditation. I can feel it's not going to be worthy, but still, it's veeeeeery hard to stop at 11.30pm. I managed 3/4 times, but then relapsed yesterday evening.
Beginning again!
 

Androg

Administrator
Admin
Moderator
GL. Try pushups when you feel an urge. Anything to break the "auto-pilot" factor.
 

viking1234

Active Member
Day 1 today.
Tried not to get into autopilot, went to the gym... Then I got back and relapsed. Like wtf :(
But hey, I can only blame myself...
 
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