Need advice

Is there a way to completely resist urges when they come? I mean at some point the urge is too much that it completely takes control over the brain and u become dumb enough to relapse...
 

Fappy

Respected Member
If you’re having trouble overcoming the urge mentally, then you’ll need to physically remove yourself. Shut down the computer, put down the phone and walk away. Your mind is not doing you any favors so you’ll need to change the environment for as long as it takes, no compromises.
 
If you’re having trouble overcoming the urge mentally, then you’ll need to physically remove yourself. Shut down the computer, put down the phone and walk away. Your mind is not doing you any favors so you’ll need to change the environment for as long as it takes, no compromises.
Ur right, thanks for the advice.
 

Phineas 808

Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
Is there a way to completely resist urges when they come? I mean at some point the urge is too much that it completely takes control over the brain and u become dumb enough to relapse...

You have to think about this completely different. The short answer is, 'No'. The urges are a result of the habit of giving in, and whether you fight or feed the urges, they'll only increase until you give in (for the reward).

You have to hack into this loop: cue (or trigger) ---> urges ---> response (for or against) ---> addicted behavior (P, PMO, or MO).

Hack into it right at the 'response' level.

First, don't put yourself in dangerous situations to begin with, like Fappy said, no compromises.

Second, hack into your habit loop: cue (or trigger) ---> urges ---> [non-response] ---> a healthy or new behavior (with repetition).

Where you hit it is through the response phase, by ignoring the urge- not fighting, not feeding it, just breathe deeply until the urge subsides.

Important to remember: the urges feel so urgent, so life-or-death, but they always subside, always... Think of it like a bell-curve or an ocean wave: it will peak, feel intense, but just wait it out- or distract yourself with something else until the urges pass.

You can outlast any urge.
 
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