scarred for life


New Member
Porn is something I was always severly grossed out by because when I was just a little girl I caught my father watching porn, let's just say more than once. It completely ruined my perspective and view on women and especially men, and as I got older I became repulsed by sex in general. For 2 years I even thought I was asexual. When i was a teenager I always felt guilty after I masturbated. It took me quite some time to finally get over my trauma around it and be completely okay with my sexuality. Because of all that I had my first boyfriend when i was 20 years old. I was in love with him since I was 17. After a couple of months we tried having sex but he couldn't stay hard. I just thought "Well we had some drinks, so maybe that was it". A month later he opened up about his porn addiction. I was completely shocked and utterly heartbroken. I knew that guys watch porn and unforunately while they are in relathionships too, but I had never pictured him doing that. I thought he was different. He thought I was gonna dump him and my initial thought was that too, but I couldn't do it because I was that in love with him. I have never been so hurt in my entire life. I was caught in the same devastating circle in which I hated our society for being so sexualised and pornified. It destroyed me completely. I felt insecure as ever and started comparing myself to those women and asked myself " What do they have that I don't?"....Nonetheless I stayed with him and helped him get over it. Everything worked out for him in the end. He changed a lot and we became really close, but this kind of stuff is something that scarres you for life. I am still so heartbroken. How can i trust him that he won't watch it again. Porn ruins relathionships as well as people. I don't know if I will ever get over this. I want to ask other women (and men) who have been in my situation-
How do I get over this feeling and can i ever?


My fiancé has a porn addiction and we’re working through it, and I still have MAJOR issues.
But I’m making a choice to trust him at Least trying to. He’s changed alot and I think that’s important. If they are changing and really showing you how well they are doing and they can continue to communicate then I think it gets easier .especially if they accept their addiction and see what it’s done. Now honestly I think all the horror stories in here scared the fuck out of my man 😭😂 cause from the moment we saw yourbrainonporn he like flipped a switch and just put 2 and 2 together with all his problems he never wants to go back.
I think we can only start to get over these feelings of betrayal when we know they are putting us as a priority


New Member
Hello,I only wanted to ask you:
1.How long have you been dating?
2.How does he treat you?
to answer your question from my male point of view:
if you want to cure your broken heart,first of all you need to trust him.However you mentioned how can I trust him above also-if he can have sex easily without problems it means he didn't watch porn because this is only way to recover pied,trust me I know from my expereince.I dont know what realy close mean to you,but if it mean he has strong feelings for you(both physically and emotionally strong feelings),then you shouldn't worry at all about him.
Hope you will feel better and that this reply would help you.