ShadeTrenicin
Well-Known Member
Hey Orbiter,
Sorry to hear about your lapse. But I commend your reflection on it.
Personally dealing with exhaustion / substance use is something I struggle with as well. And, I don't know about you but I'm coming more and more to the conclusion that every time we allow ourselves the usage, we allow ourself to let go. And while in normal circumstances this would be manageable, for us this is very contradictive. Because on the PMO side there is a very, very strict zero-tolerance policy. For a reason of course. But we do allow ourselves leanience in other parts of our life, while in fact the same decision making is involved.So while I'm not a black and white person at all. I am coming to understand more and more to apply a zero tolerance on more than one part of my life. Simply because it makes saying no easier for my brain. It's like you're reducing the number of items on the menu of a restaurant. Basically Ialways say: the less items on a menu, the easier it is for the customer to choose and the better a kitchen is to maintain a high quality. Having said that I really like that you've put alcohol of the table until checkpoint 6. But, I do wonder (and mostly because it directly applies to me as well) isn't 1 month a little short? Because you are pretty much the same age as me, have been addicted to P for a long time, have issues of negative self talk for a long while like me.. Isn't 1 month to short, as in; woulnd't the rewiring of our brains take longer than 1 month?
Now, this is of course your thread and I've been musing in it, so back to you.
Regarding the self-talk it sounds like ruminating. It's like you said; you indulde and create internel argument. And snapping out of it is damn difficult. Perhaps a similar approach as to PMO can be implied indeed as you mention; recognize, breathe and let them go as they serve you no purpose.
Once again you've been very insightful over your own relapses Orbiter. Your insights have helped me gain insight into myself as well
Take care and stay strong.
Sorry to hear about your lapse. But I commend your reflection on it.
Personally dealing with exhaustion / substance use is something I struggle with as well. And, I don't know about you but I'm coming more and more to the conclusion that every time we allow ourselves the usage, we allow ourself to let go. And while in normal circumstances this would be manageable, for us this is very contradictive. Because on the PMO side there is a very, very strict zero-tolerance policy. For a reason of course. But we do allow ourselves leanience in other parts of our life, while in fact the same decision making is involved.So while I'm not a black and white person at all. I am coming to understand more and more to apply a zero tolerance on more than one part of my life. Simply because it makes saying no easier for my brain. It's like you're reducing the number of items on the menu of a restaurant. Basically Ialways say: the less items on a menu, the easier it is for the customer to choose and the better a kitchen is to maintain a high quality. Having said that I really like that you've put alcohol of the table until checkpoint 6. But, I do wonder (and mostly because it directly applies to me as well) isn't 1 month a little short? Because you are pretty much the same age as me, have been addicted to P for a long time, have issues of negative self talk for a long while like me.. Isn't 1 month to short, as in; woulnd't the rewiring of our brains take longer than 1 month?
Now, this is of course your thread and I've been musing in it, so back to you.
Regarding the self-talk it sounds like ruminating. It's like you said; you indulde and create internel argument. And snapping out of it is damn difficult. Perhaps a similar approach as to PMO can be implied indeed as you mention; recognize, breathe and let them go as they serve you no purpose.
Once again you've been very insightful over your own relapses Orbiter. Your insights have helped me gain insight into myself as well
Take care and stay strong.