wrijak
Member
Day 76
Yesterday during the night I had a wet dream, during which I dreamed about relapsing to porn. It's interesting, just when it starts feeling like porn or urges about it are pretty much nonexistent in my life, suddenly this happens. There was some brief guilt and anxiety when waking up, but then there was relief realizing it was just a dream and I'm still doing good with my recovery. Nothing to worry about of course, but it is a good reminder that danger of falling back to old habits is still here. Recovery still continues.
I have a girlfriend now, which turned my recovery around a bit, but mostly to the good. It's the first girl I'm dating since I started recovery, and it's nice to see some of the positive changes that happened to me since previous relationships. For example before I used to be very needy and attached, and used to compulsively lust for sex similary I would lust for porn. I was basically unable to cuddle with a girl without needing to have sex with her. Now I feel much more in control, and am able to show some restrain, which I believe shows a bit more attractive trait. There are some problems though - flatline is definitely a thing, although the second time it was a bit better, so I will see how that goes.
Yesterday during the night I had a wet dream, during which I dreamed about relapsing to porn. It's interesting, just when it starts feeling like porn or urges about it are pretty much nonexistent in my life, suddenly this happens. There was some brief guilt and anxiety when waking up, but then there was relief realizing it was just a dream and I'm still doing good with my recovery. Nothing to worry about of course, but it is a good reminder that danger of falling back to old habits is still here. Recovery still continues.
I have a girlfriend now, which turned my recovery around a bit, but mostly to the good. It's the first girl I'm dating since I started recovery, and it's nice to see some of the positive changes that happened to me since previous relationships. For example before I used to be very needy and attached, and used to compulsively lust for sex similary I would lust for porn. I was basically unable to cuddle with a girl without needing to have sex with her. Now I feel much more in control, and am able to show some restrain, which I believe shows a bit more attractive trait. There are some problems though - flatline is definitely a thing, although the second time it was a bit better, so I will see how that goes.