Dungalef
Active Member
Hey guys, this is my first time every posting in a forum like this. Been fighting this battle on my own for a long time (with occasional conversations with real-life friends, but not enough), and I need some encouragement and accountability. Would love to get some people who can check in on me here regularly!
I'll try to tell my story briefly...porn has been a part of my life since I was probably 12 years old or so. Sometimes more, sometimes less, but as a Christian it has been something that has always been very very shameful for me, hard to acknowledge and talk about. This is something I've done a lot of working through and have improved tremendously in, but I think the secrecy and shame around it for so long did a lot to make this harder for me. I have learned to receive the grace that God gives me, and to extend that to myself, but it's still not easy to remember that all the time.
Anyway, I'm a bit of a chronic relapser. Have had streaks where things have gone well, sometimes longer and sometimes shorter, but often shorter. Last December I had a shift in mindset where I just told myself...no, this is done. I managed to shift out of the fatalism I have felt for so long, into a real confidence that I could and would do this. Made it to almost 90 days before I started a slide downwards. Accepting more and more "little" things into my life until I was basically watching porn again, if not very often. Since then I've had a hard time making it past a couple of weeks, and I don't know how to get back into that confidence again. It was the first time in years that I really felt hope for conquering this, and I want to get there again. So here we go.
Any words of advice or encouragement, guys?
I'll try to tell my story briefly...porn has been a part of my life since I was probably 12 years old or so. Sometimes more, sometimes less, but as a Christian it has been something that has always been very very shameful for me, hard to acknowledge and talk about. This is something I've done a lot of working through and have improved tremendously in, but I think the secrecy and shame around it for so long did a lot to make this harder for me. I have learned to receive the grace that God gives me, and to extend that to myself, but it's still not easy to remember that all the time.
Anyway, I'm a bit of a chronic relapser. Have had streaks where things have gone well, sometimes longer and sometimes shorter, but often shorter. Last December I had a shift in mindset where I just told myself...no, this is done. I managed to shift out of the fatalism I have felt for so long, into a real confidence that I could and would do this. Made it to almost 90 days before I started a slide downwards. Accepting more and more "little" things into my life until I was basically watching porn again, if not very often. Since then I've had a hard time making it past a couple of weeks, and I don't know how to get back into that confidence again. It was the first time in years that I really felt hope for conquering this, and I want to get there again. So here we go.
Any words of advice or encouragement, guys?