I've hit the flatline today. Depressed, no energy or motivation. Lethargic. Gotta go through it to get to where I wanna be, and the person that I know I can be that's on the other side of this struggle.Day 9. Hard mode. My main urges have been to MO. No porn urges. I've had maybe 2 flashbacks this time, but no huge P urges. But I know, at some point one will come knocking on my door. Just gotta stay serious and have my guard up when the devil comes knocking.
How true this is.but it's amazing how our brains can act like they are 5 year olds upset because we won't give them the candy that they are used to
Thank you. I definitely feel so much better in my head. That's the main thing I've experienced this time. Better mental clarity.Yeah, it can’t be easy going so long on hard mode. I feel like urges kind of build up after a while without O, but then again M also can contribute a lot to those urges. You just have to find what works best for you, while staying away from porn.
Nearly at two weeks now, well done on that!
This afternoon has been difficult. Stress and anxiety and I'm beginning to feel depressed and just crappy. The flatline seems to be here. I thought It was the other day, but that turned out to be a false alarm. Only way out is through.Day 13 without porn. I say that, because I'm now off of hard mode. I did not use porn of any kind, and don't really feel like it hurt my progress. Porn is the problem for me, and I definitely sense healing happening. To all the ones on here able to go on hard mode for a long time, you all are legendary. My goals still remain the same. I still want to go a full year porn free. My urges have been manageable these last few days, and I feel like this reboot is the one where I'll have final victory over my porn struggles. I may try hard mode again, or I may drastically reduce MO like it says on YBOP to continue allowing my reward center to heal. I will say though, I did not beat myself up, I'm proud of myself for that. I hope everyone has a great day. Thank you for your support.