I will make it -- Looking forward to taking my life back

First_step_thousand_miles

Respected Member
:ROFLMAO: Love it!

I'm glad to hear you're getting back into the gym. Nice. Keep killing it man.
Haha yeah this one was odd, I don't really even know if I've had an erection this hard for such a sustained period of time. Can't complain haha

Yessir, I redesigned my workout to minimize injuries. I don't mind getting there slower, what sucks and is motivation-sapping is just constantly getting injured. Slow and steady wins the race as they say
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Respected Member
Day 892 no porn

MO'd thinking about the gf last night haha (very strong), resetting the clock. Made it over 2 weeks this time which was cool. I'm happy to MO once in a while as needed, just don't want to be doing it like 3x a week or anything. Once or twice a month seems reasonable to me, though if there are months where I don't feel like it then I won't too. Just depends

Boners are getting pretty strong the more I see the gf. Things are trending well
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Respected Member
Two more days brother. Two more days! :cool:

Fuck ya! Any plans to celebrate?

Best
Thank you my man! Seeing the girlfriend tomorrow so I'm pretty content with that haha

Otherwise man, I feel pretty darn good these days in many ways. I haven't done the cold showers in a while, but meditation + gratitude + exercise are making me feel like I'm on top of the world. Highly recommend them all

I guess the main thing that makes me feel good these days is PROGRESS. Being with a girl I really like and continuing to make progress on no porn, gym, and just enjoying life (reading books, talking with friends, etc). I feel like I haven't been in such a properly good state in a while. It's not perfect but it's better today than it was a year ago or even two years ago in many ways. Life feels....exciting again. And that's a beautiful feeling

Kind of a ramble but just wanted to share haha. You are my Day 1 man, thanks for sticking with me through all my turmoil. How's life with you my man?
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Respected Member
Day 901 no porn
Day 10 no MO

Crossed 900 days. Honestly had some urges past few days but it's related to a trigger point -- as I mentioned early on in my journey, one of the categories I used to MO to was animated crap. These days I obviously don't look at any porn but I do watch anime and read some manhwa (Korean version of manga basically) .

On anime -- I stay away from porn-like anime and just stick to the normal stuff. Urges here are minimal to nonexistent, I don't watch much anyway. If there are urges because a show is getting risqué, I just don't watch it. I'm done with that crap. Regardless, this is something I can regulate

On manga -- this is the problem. For some reason, this triggers my brain. Still like 2-3 out of 10 compared to when I started (when urges were >7 out of 10) which speaks to how far I've come but also in a way feels like it's a 'gateway' drug back into porn. Other issue is on any such regular manga site, there's all these adds for porn! Wtf even a normal story now is gonna mean you're bombarded by at least softcore porn. Which means there's only one conclusion -- I just have to stop reading it. So that's my resolution

I have far too much to live for and far too much to lose that I don't want to take these kinds of risks. I have a gf I really care about and see a future with, I'm 900+ days porn free, and I'm looking to move forward with my life. So I guess I'm proactively cutting out something that could threaten this. It's a slight bummer given I just like reading fictional stories, but I'll just read books instead. Just a reminder that once you quit porn even years later, just stay vigilant everyone. We are never going back
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Respected Member
Double post today but as I was making this important resolution, I figured I'd bundle them together at once. I just deleted FB app from my phone and logged out on web browser. Realized I was wasting time on it, often found content that kind of upset made / made me less satisfied with my life / etc. I didn't delete my account itself in case there are uses for it in the next few years, I'm only 28 right now. There are still -- once in a very blue moon -- social events that people still plan with it, or it can be used to find events for activities one is interested in. But I am planning on deleting it entirely in the next 3-5yrs.

Since I deleted Twitter a few weeks ago, the only social media I have on my phone is LinkedIn. I might re-download Twitter around the Election Day just to see what people are talking about and delete it right after, but otherwise I'm not gonna use it either (sadly, Twitter is taken over by porn bots these days).

I also have this habit of reading the news on my phone when I'm bored, esp. if there isn't social media to scroll through. I guess the next thing is finding replacement activities on my phone if I'm not going to 1) use social media or 2) read the news. Any ideas? Open to all @Blondie @SmokenMirrors
 
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Blondie

Respected Member
I guess the main thing that makes me feel good these days is PROGRESS. Being with a girl I really like and continuing to make progress on no porn, gym, and just enjoying life (reading books, talking with friends, etc). I feel like I haven't been in such a properly good state in a while. It's not perfect but it's better today than it was a year ago or even two years ago in many ways. Life feels....exciting again. And that's a beautiful feeling
This makes me so happy, @First_step_thousand_miles. :cool: You've put in much work so you definitely deserve it. It's great to hear that the lady and you are doing well. That is what this is all about. Getting right with women and our relationships with them.

You are my Day 1 man, thanks for sticking with me through all my turmoil. How's life with you my man?
My pleasure, it's been quite the ride doing this together, and an honor!

I'm doing well these days. I've been pretty busy with life, so I'm not spending so much time here, which I think is a good thing. I'm still working out, losing weight, and working on these new career goals I've been changing up over the summer. Life is good. Many changes going on but that's a good thing.
Crossed 900 days. Honestly had some urges past few days but it's related to a trigger point -- as I mentioned early on in my journey, one of the categories I used to MO to was animated crap. These days I obviously don't look at any porn but I do watch anime and read some manhwa (Korean version of manga basically)
First of all, congratulations passing over the threshold of 900 days. Fucking awesome my man! Secondly, good job staying strong throughout temptations.
On manga -- this is the problem. For some reason, this triggers my brain. Still like 2-3 out of 10 compared to when I started (when urges were >7 out of 10) which speaks to how far I've come but also in a way feels like it's a 'gateway' drug back into porn. Other issue is on any such regular manga site, there's all these adds for porn! Wtf even a normal story now is gonna mean you're bombarded by at least softcore porn. Which means there's only one conclusion -- I just have to stop reading it. So that's my resolution
Yes, this sounds to be problematic, especially if it's really becoming tempting. It's good that it's lower on the rector scale than it was before, but if you're feeling it's becoming an issue, than yeah, give it the boot for now, or maybe forever. I think this is one of those things that is a real gray area and different for all of us. We all know porn is not an option, and that's a real clean distinct line to draw, but where do we draw the line for other activities? What may be good for one man will not be good for another. Or even, what's not good right now might be okay within a year from now, but you need to listen to yourself and be honest and ask, is this really helping me or not? Do what you have to do. It's fucking disgusting that there are so many ads for porn on sites like that. What the hell? Any way, good job.
Double post today but as I was making this important resolution, I figured I'd bundle them together at once. I just deleted FB app from my phone and logged out on web browser. Realized I was wasting time on it, often found content that kind of upset made / made me less satisfied with my life / etc. I didn't delete my account itself in case there are uses for it in the next few years, I'm only 28 right now. There are still -- once in a very blue moon -- social events that people still plan with it, or it can be used to find events for activities one is interested in. But I am planning on deleting it entirely in the next 3-5yrs.
This is nice. Yes, I still have FB but I hardly use it these days, and it's been that way for a few years now. I just don't see the point, and often it made me feel "bad" about life and about what "other people" were doing. Who knows, maybe as my life gets better and more defined I won't care so much, but it was a time suck too, and I don't really see any point in going back, besides just checking in once in a while.
I also have this habit of reading the news on my phone when I'm bored, esp. if there isn't social media to scroll through. I guess the next thing is finding replacement activities on my phone if I'm not going to 1) use social media or 2) read the news. Any ideas?
I guess you could just not use your phone unless you're actually using it as a phone. Or, read a book on there that's uplifting and educational. Podcasts are also a great idea. You could also start playing games, but that just seems to be another time suck, or at least it is for me. Of course, there's nothing wrong with a time suck here and there, just as long as it's purposeful and not accidental and takes hours of your day when you weren't meaning for it to.

Either way man, you're killing it man. It's been a pleasure doing this journey with you.

Best
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Respected Member
This makes me so happy, @First_step_thousand_miles. :cool: You've put in much work so you definitely deserve it. It's great to hear that the lady and you are doing well. That is what this is all about. Getting right with women and our relationships with them.

First of all, thanks so much for the super detailed thoughts and support brother! Really means a lot to me. Getting a good relationship with the right woman...my god, I haven't been this close to content in YEARS. It's incredible, all the porn in the world could never fill this hole in my heart

My pleasure, it's been quite the ride doing this together, and an honor!
Truly an honor man, feels like we're in the trenches of WW1 -- seeing your fight gave me so much motivation for my own. I hope in some small way I contributed to your journey as well

I'm doing well these days. I've been pretty busy with life, so I'm not spending so much time here, which I think is a good thing. I'm still working out, losing weight, and working on these new career goals I've been changing up over the summer. Life is good. Many changes going on but that's a good thing.

That's awesome man -- this forum is ultimately a place for you to give & take as much or as little as you need at different points in time. So it's great that you're spending quality time offline. Awesome to hear on the working out! What split are you following?

I'm asking since I was doing 3x full body a week lifting and low-intensity cardio like 2-3x a week, but I'm actually planning as of this week to switch to 2x full body lifting and 3x moderate intensity cardio a week instead. So still 5x working out weekly but the benefits are:

1) unless you are at least an intermediate stage lifter, 2x full body a week is plenty (see Alex Leonidas for instance who build his physique in 2x weekly) to put on a lot of mass. Go balls to the wall intensity on those two days, but the thing is you ALWAYS recover. I was noticing at 3x per week I wasn't recovering enough for my next workout, but with 2x if you work out Mon and then Thu (or Tue and Fri or pick your combo), you're getting ~3 rest days each time so even with poor recovery capabilities you'll be fine. Which means less strains, injuries and more motivation since you're only doing 2x a week (vs. 3x which can be mentally more taxing)

2) on cardio, moderate intensity is WAY better than low in terms of cardio health, logenvity, erections, etc. High intensity can be good but also you're prone to more injury which is not great. I hate running, so the alternative is incline treadmill walking. There's a great program called 3/12/30 (3 speed, 12% incline, 30min) which is awesome to do 3x per week or even a bit more if you don't lift

Just wanted to share my learnings in case it was beneficial to you brother.

Otherwise, super happy to hear you're finding more direction in your career man! Life is all about finding meaningful fulfillment, and sounds like you're on the right path to doing just that.

First of all, congratulations passing over the threshold of 900 days. Fucking awesome my man! Secondly, good job staying strong throughout temptations.
It was hard brother, but I feel like I'm past the bulk of the painful period. Temptations these days are minimal without triggers (like the manga I mentioned earlier), and I just avoid triggers. Life is good

Yes, this sounds to be problematic, especially if it's really becoming tempting. It's good that it's lower on the rector scale than it was before, but if you're feeling it's becoming an issue, than yeah, give it the boot for now, or maybe forever. I think this is one of those things that is a real gray area and different for all of us. We all know porn is not an option, and that's a real clean distinct line to draw, but where do we draw the line for other activities? What may be good for one man will not be good for another. Or even, what's not good right now might be okay within a year from now, but you need to listen to yourself and be honest and ask, is this really helping me or not? Do what you have to do. It's fucking disgusting that there are so many ads for porn on sites like that. What the hell? Any way, good job.
Yeah a lot of wisdom here -- you bring up a great point that sometimes somethings can be give a boot for some time, and can later be ok. Others maybe you just permanently give up. I think manga is one of those things for me I'll just give up. Because if I'm nearly 2.5yrs into my reboot and that's giving me temptations (in a way that even a semi nude woman in a regular movie sex scene doesn't) that means it's better to just kick it out of my life. And with the gf, working out, and reading books I don't have as much time for it anyway (which will only become harder as I get older anyway). So there isn't enough of a good reason to keep it around. You're right, it's not helping and it's not meaningfully lifting my quality of life even without the negatives either. I'll miss it a bit but it's not all-important. Just sad how much softcore-type porn has infiltrated our lives in such a way

This is nice. Yes, I still have FB but I hardly use it these days, and it's been that way for a few years now. I just don't see the point, and often it made me feel "bad" about life and about what "other people" were doing. Who knows, maybe as my life gets better and more defined I won't care so much, but it was a time suck too, and I don't really see any point in going back, besides just checking in once in a while.

Exactly! That's how I feel, seeing people get married or have kids and feeling like I'm 'behind' -- when it fact there's no such thing! Life already feels way better having deleted it off my phone. Still have the account but also logged out on my computer and deleted my password. As a result, in the past week I haven't accessed it once and I don't miss it at all!

There's little upside to adding it back in man, instead go enjoy nature, read a book, call a friend, etc. Just my two cents honestly supporting the same thinking you are having as well

I guess you could just not use your phone unless you're actually using it as a phone. Or, read a book on there that's uplifting and educational. Podcasts are also a great idea. You could also start playing games, but that just seems to be another time suck, or at least it is for me. Of course, there's nothing wrong with a time suck here and there, just as long as it's purposeful and not accidental and takes hours of your day when you weren't meaning for it to.
Yeah that's solid, maybe more podcasts and books. Both of those seem good, as well as just mental wandering which we used to do pre smartphone.

Either way man, you're killing it man. It's been a pleasure doing this journey with you.

The pleasure is all mine brother -- grateful to be on this journey with you!
 

Blondie

Respected Member
my god, I haven't been this close to content in YEARS. It's incredible, all the porn in the world could never fill this hole in my heart
Yes INDEED! Love this. :cool:
Truly an honor man, feels like we're in the trenches of WW1 -- seeing your fight gave me so much motivation for my own. I hope in some small way I contributed to your journey as well
It truly does feel like we are in the trenches together, the trenches of a postmodern hellhole! You definitely have contributed much to my journey as well my friend. Thank you.
What split are you following?
Since I've been out of university, I've had no access to a gym so far, thus I've been relegated to doing workouts at home. Thus, I've been doing squats, pushups, and body movements etc., which I've really come to enjoy. Also, I'm hiking everyday which has been fantastic for my mental health as well. The greatest part is that I've just been consistent with this part of my life, also with my eating habits, so I've been consistently losing weight, body fat, too, almost to 19%.

What you're doing seems to be working, so stay with it. I'm glad you found a way to work around injuries, hopefully twice a week will be better for you.
I think manga is one of those things for me I'll just give up. Because if I'm nearly 2.5yrs into my reboot and that's giving me temptations (in a way that even a semi nude woman in a regular movie sex scene doesn't) that means it's better to just kick it out of my life.
I love how you're willing to give up something that seems to be a constant pain in the ass, thus, thinking long term about the true benefits of being porn free.

Love it!

Keep killing it man.

Love ya, Blondie
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Respected Member
Yes INDEED! Love this. :cool:

It truly does feel like we are in the trenches together, the trenches of a postmodern hellhole! You definitely have contributed much to my journey as well my friend. Thank you.
Yeah each generation fights a different battle I guess! Except the boomers, they truly were blessed haha

Since I've been out of university, I've had no access to a gym so far, thus I've been relegated to doing workouts at home. Thus, I've been doing squats, pushups, and body movements etc., which I've really come to enjoy. Also, I'm hiking everyday which has been fantastic for my mental health as well. The greatest part is that I've just been consistent with this part of my life, also with my eating habits, so I've been consistently losing weight, body fat, too, almost to 19%.

What you're doing seems to be working, so stay with it. I'm glad you found a way to work around injuries, hopefully twice a week will be better for you.
All good man, I love the hiking! Getting out in nature and exercise together is like a holy grail for mental and physical health. Gotta do what you enjoy. Frankly, I was getting a bit tired of lifting 3x weekly mentally speaking too so it's a good change. Did some cardio this morning listening to a podcast and it was awesome! Sounds like you're doing it right with a healthy mix of cardio and weights. Look into band training if you're at home, it's a great way to resistance train at home with more consideration for your joints

I love how you're willing to give up something that seems to be a constant pain in the ass, thus, thinking long term about the true benefits of being porn free.
It's all about the long term future man! Porn itself is a short term solution, long term is to quit and find joy with a partner. Same thing I think for other parts of life. The last 'external' negative in my life is over-reading the news. I have to read some as it relates to my work but I have to get more disciplined on not checking news over the weekend or after work hours.

Love it!

Keep killing it man.

Love ya, Blondie
Love you man, keep killing it as well!
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Respected Member
Day 914 no porn
Day 2 no MO
Day 2 cold shower
Day 2 gratitude
Day 2 meditation

Starting the cold showers and gratitude practice again. I've been doing meditation but going to focus on doing it even better. Mental health has felt a little tilted past few days, all of these are important practices to keeping it healthy. Also now doing cardio religiously at least 3x per week as of last week (good for physical and mental health)

Otherwise it's a busy week at work so grinding it out
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Respected Member
Day 917 no porn
Day 1 no MO
Day 6 cold shower
Day 6 gratitude
Day 6 meditation

MO'd to thinking about my girlfriend yesterday lol, got easily erect and stayed hard. Couple observations which I think are making my erections better:

- Cardio: This both lowers stress and improves cardiovascular fitness. I'm getting more random boners when I do cardio regularly. Also I'm getting more morning wood when I do it, and my erections feel much firmer as well. Weights are cool, but I cannot over stress how much moderate intensity cardio is even better for erection health. I'm doing 3-4x weekly for that workout I mentioned earlier (30min/3speed/12%incline) and I'm loving it. I throw on a nice podcast and just grind it out, feels awesome during and after

- Non-cardio lowering stress: doing this via cold showers, gratitude, meditation which are all helping me center myself so amazingly well. I just don't feel stressed out as much WHEN I stick to these routines. I'm not perfect, when I get lazy it can fall off a bit but when I'm good about it (like right now) the combo of the 3 works wonders

Onwards fellas
 
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