He does need to to better and more. He's a tough nut though. As I've said, he is reluctant to go for help with this...he is a very strong minded person who has overcome many battles on his own and believes this is what works best for him. I am not confident he will succeed on this one without help (which of course doesn't help with my trust issues). I am (sort of) mentally prepared for a relapse. If this happens ultimatums will be placed in front of him - or not - depending on if he is truthful or deceitful. If truthful it will be ultimatums, if he hides stuff again I will most likely walk. Time will tell and we will see.Dear @Sammyjo , I reread your whole thread again. I knew it would be painful. I am not out of solutions for you but obviously your husband has to pick up the baton. Only he can do this. Tell him you KNOW it works. It is amazing. I feel different and I am different and your husband can be there too. @Sammyjo this may be your big chance, I am envious if so.