Hey again! Glad to see you trucking through this reboot. I would just advise you to keep an open mind about this; I know that work and school can be extremely demanding and self improvement is critical if one wants to live a happy and successful life. That being said, in terms of recovery, it's also really important to be open to new relationships, platonic or non-platonic, to rewire the part of your brain that's been isolated as a result of p use.
Hei, thank you for your advice. You are right - I should be open, and I am really interested in girls. But for me it's important to have my priorities straight. Because in the past I was really too nice to the girls and a few of my gf didn't treat me right. Or maybe it was on me, because I was too nice and too pleasing. I didn't make it interesting.
Whatever. I made a decision in the summer of 2020 and set out a career goal. I am now on that mission.
That beeing said - I would really like to have a relaxed date again, maybe cook together, cuddle, kiss and make love. But I am relaxed about that.
Day 25.
On Thrusday I studied long hours and really made progress. Then I had an awesome workout in the evening. But I was also running with a friend the day before and noticed that the workout was really hard. The night I couldn't sleep that good and woke up pretty tired,
Caffeine is off the table, becaude it floods my brain with dopamin and I have found a clear correlation between caffeine consumption and relapses in the past.
Friday didn't go that well. Because I was so tired, I couldn't find the discipline to study hard - but I ordered an external monitor to optimize my work set-up at home. This has long been on my list - so it's okay. And it's also important to have an ergonomic set up and I also try to have fun while I am studying. The hours are long enough.
In the evening I allowed myself to whatch youtube. This was not treating myself well. I was tired, I tried to force myself to study, that let to me trying to escape myself in youtube. Next time I will just call it a day, or sleep for an hour and see, if the concentration will be better than.
Because weekends are the challenging part of my week, I will set the goal to totally rock this weekend!
This evening I have a studygroup meeting, during lunch we meet up in the canteen and on sunday evening I will workout and have a skype call with a friend of mine.
This should be a solid infrastructure to keep me on track.
Whish you all the best.