How do you explain porn addiction to someone...

D

Donewiththis

Member
Without sounding like you are making excuses for the behaviour? I tried explaining it to someone and I felt like I was just justifying why I do PMO.

"I watched porn all my life and it has now fucked my brain up. So even if I try to quit, something will eventually trigger me to get that urge. Because I messed up my brain so bad, I have a really hard time fighting the urge and usually just give in to it."

I obviously did not explain it exactly like that, but that is definitely how it felt like I was explaining the situation.

The response that I got was that if I really wanted to quit, I would. They quit smoking cold turkey for their spouse before their marriage and never looked back. It's a selfish and defeatist attitude.

I mean I get their point, and it probably is the cold hard truth. I just don't want to sound like "woe is me", nor do I want anyone to pity me. I just want to be able to explain the situation and have the person understand what I'm going through and how hard the journey is going to be for me.
 
E

Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
Donewiththis said:
Without sounding like you are making excuses for the behaviour? I tried explaining it to someone and I felt like I was just justifying why I do PMO.

"I watched porn all my life and it has now fucked my brain up. So even if I try to quit, something will eventually trigger me to get that urge. Because I messed up my brain so bad, I have a really hard time fighting the urge and usually just give in to it."

I obviously did not explain it exactly like that, but that is definitely how it felt like I was explaining the situation.

The response that I got was that if I really wanted to quit, I would. They quit smoking cold turkey for their spouse before their marriage and never looked back. It's a selfish and defeatist attitude.

I mean I get their point, and it probably is the cold hard truth. I just don't want to sound like "woe is me", nor do I want anyone to pity me. I just want to be able to explain the situation and have the person understand what I'm going through and how hard the journey is going to be for me.
Click to expand...
That's right, I had the same problem while thinking how to bring up my porn addiction to my parents but in the end I felt it was too much hassle and I didn't do it. It's true that when people have a problem, some of them fear the reaction they will get if they talk about it. Porn addiction is a misunderstood and new addiction, many people don't know about it, especially old school people like my parents. Telling them about my alcohol problem was straight forward and simple because we were all three on the same page. They knew about alcohol addiction. But when it comes to porn addiction, I don't know, I don't feel like I want to tell people who don't know what this is. That's why coming to a place like Reboot Nation where everybody is on the same page helps.
 
TryingHarder

TryingHarder

Well-Known Member
The response that I got was that if I really wanted to quit, I would.
Click to expand...
While this is true, it's also not that simple. It's called an addiction for a reason. Whether it's porn or alcohol or drugs, our brains have been warped and we have developed a psychological dependency on bad behaviour. Of course you have to want to quit, but it will take discipline, time, and support, and the people around you need to understand that.
 
E

Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
TryingHarder said:
While this is true, it's also not that simple. It's called an addiction for a reason. Whether it's porn or alcohol or drugs, our brains have been warped and we have developed a psychological dependency on bad behaviour. Of course you have to want to quit, but it will take discipline, time, and support, and the people around you need to understand that.
Click to expand...
Yes, often people who are addicted to something don't think they could escape that, they see their problem as the biggest problem, and while it's true to be told stuff like "If you really wanted to quit, you would", as you say, it includes more variables, it includes a change in mentality to believe change is possible, it includes being helped, it includes recognizing and changing patterns, habits etc. It's not just an act of abstinence, that's what I mean and that's what people who are not addicts often don't understand. I could push through it and achieve 100 days no alcohol no porn so what? As long as the source of my misery is not resolved I can go back to Day 1 so simple.
 
Oscar40

Oscar40

Active Member
Donewiththis said:
"I watched porn all my life and it has now fucked my brain up
Click to expand...
The truth is that no one "wrecks" their brains by watching too much porn. Simply, like anything in life, if you do it too much, you will end up getting tired.

That's what happens when you watch porn too much: your mind (brain) gets tired and stops wanting (low libido). Simply that. Sex is like ice cream: if you eat too much ice cream, then your body will stop asking for ice cream at some point in the year. However, that doesn't mean you've "screwed up" or "ruined" your brain or your body.

You haven't screwed up your brain. Simply, for now, your brain is tired, but not "broken." Your brain is just tired (too many orgasms at the moment) and one symptom of that tiredness is low sexual motivation (low libido).
 
Oscar40

Oscar40

Active Member
thetruth said:
sex addicition is hardest to cure because it is a basic human need.
smoking alcohol arent natural to the body.

tbh I found quitting coffee the hardest, but not as hard as porn
Click to expand...



You are confused: porn addiction is one thing, and sex addiction is quite another.

Why are you confusing things?





thetruth said:
I found quitting coffee the hardest
Click to expand...

Now, regarding the coffee:

Did you know that here in Colombia we are the largest coffee exporters in the world?

Did you know that we Colombians always drink up to 3 cups of coffee a day?

For us Colombians, coffee is something very healthy. I don't know how the issue is in your country, and I don't know what culture you belong to, but to say that coffee is harmful is nonsense for us Colombians.

I recommend that you investigate the history of our country (Colombia) and our relationship with coffee. We are the largest exporters in the world and our coffee is unmatched in the world.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top