A new approach - Day 0

Srta. Silva

New Member
Hi, I'm 21 years old and since I've been reading books at 14 I've been reading porn (initially, I later "evolved" into other forms of consumption).

To be honest, this is very strange to me. I have never spoken to any friends before, at least not the whole truth, I just let the people closest to me know that one day, in the past, I did that.

One important thing, I'm Brazilian and I don't speak English (but I promise I'll learn it, it's in my annual plan), so I'd like to apologize if the text gets a little confusing.

Today was day 0.
I managed to go 4 days without reading anything and I'm feeling really bad about myself because I hate it from the bottom of my heart and every time I think about who I am and the person I want to be in the future... my attitudes make me angry

In fact, the most time I've been without reading so far has been 7 days in the last month. At least once a week I see.

It's not as bad as it once was, but I know that if I'm not careful, all the evolution of the last few years will take me to the hell where I came from.

These were the questions the admin posted and I'll try to answer them in order.

Did I see pornography today?
Yes, I read about it, a lot, but that was it and for 1h

What are my triggers?
I admit that I think about it all the time. But this week I started watching a political TV series (rating +18).
Some scenes created new scenes in my head.
I was also home alone with my cell phone at my disposal and researched P-Subs.

Note: A character in this series said something really cool about addiction, he is an alcoholic and has been clean for 14 years.
His speech made me cry a little and I felt more motivated to move on and fight something that has plagued me since I was a teenager.

How did I calm my anxiety or stress?
I literally Googled addicts anonymous

What am I grateful for today?
For finding this forum, for not giving up, for this not being my last day because I feel like I would die full of regrets.

day 0. You Can! I believe you!