Chubakeane
Member
Sometimes i think can write a book, cause my problem with this addiction (silent, dark and solitary addition) occurs a long time along and occurs on different ways and intensities ranging from have doubt about my sexuality to fall in rares videos like the scat as a form to "aument the dose" (aniway now im sure to im bisex)
Today i had a relapse again, but i want take this like a "last time and goodbye" (my fuc**ing porn blocker for some reason has failed today)
i will beging my 0 day introducing myself and after will below developed my life history. although now Im going to tell you about my last period.
well, i'm 28 years old, live with my wife, and we are doing a medical treatment to can be pregnant (i wanna be a great father, and i will had to can get over this!)
Lately I was watching a lot of porn every day, more than once a day. I have always been very obsessed with bbw in the straight porn categories (many times I took that obsession away from home and compulsively saw fat women on the street... God I feel so guilty) I later fell into the gay categories because straight porn didn't excite me as much anymore and beging to need aument the dose.
[Trigger warning! Read carefully, what I am going to tell you are very dangerous practices that can affect your health]
Here is the most dangerous part of my addiction: I began to feel that DMO was not enough and I started an old practice that I had already experienced when I was single: using homemade dildos (vegetables, cylindrical containers, sticks, etc.) Little by little this grew: when I was alone in my house I used to put on my wife's underwear, take a large mirror to the bathroom and start that ritual there that ended up cumming on my own face and then a feeling of emptiness and inexplicable shame. Even so, every time I knew that I was going to be alone in my house, I was invaded by a terrible anxiety to do those practices again, which I insist, are very dangerous and have even hurt me slightly. I have even made them while taking a shower or while my wife was sleeping.
Obviously I have had ED on several occasions, the fact that we don't have sex very often has saved me and I was able to excuse myself by saying "I'm tired today"
At the same time I think that not being single often saves me from committing other more risky acts such as contacting a shemale. Something that certainly tempted me a lot I
also think that if I had invested time in music and my piano, which is my passion, instead of porn, today I would be an excellent musician. Well, I am going to leave this for now, waiting tomorrow to tell you that I am clean, I apologize for the length of this story and I would very much like to read them all..
Thank you very much really!
Today i had a relapse again, but i want take this like a "last time and goodbye" (my fuc**ing porn blocker for some reason has failed today)
i will beging my 0 day introducing myself and after will below developed my life history. although now Im going to tell you about my last period.
well, i'm 28 years old, live with my wife, and we are doing a medical treatment to can be pregnant (i wanna be a great father, and i will had to can get over this!)
Lately I was watching a lot of porn every day, more than once a day. I have always been very obsessed with bbw in the straight porn categories (many times I took that obsession away from home and compulsively saw fat women on the street... God I feel so guilty) I later fell into the gay categories because straight porn didn't excite me as much anymore and beging to need aument the dose.
[Trigger warning! Read carefully, what I am going to tell you are very dangerous practices that can affect your health]
Here is the most dangerous part of my addiction: I began to feel that DMO was not enough and I started an old practice that I had already experienced when I was single: using homemade dildos (vegetables, cylindrical containers, sticks, etc.) Little by little this grew: when I was alone in my house I used to put on my wife's underwear, take a large mirror to the bathroom and start that ritual there that ended up cumming on my own face and then a feeling of emptiness and inexplicable shame. Even so, every time I knew that I was going to be alone in my house, I was invaded by a terrible anxiety to do those practices again, which I insist, are very dangerous and have even hurt me slightly. I have even made them while taking a shower or while my wife was sleeping.
Obviously I have had ED on several occasions, the fact that we don't have sex very often has saved me and I was able to excuse myself by saying "I'm tired today"
At the same time I think that not being single often saves me from committing other more risky acts such as contacting a shemale. Something that certainly tempted me a lot I
also think that if I had invested time in music and my piano, which is my passion, instead of porn, today I would be an excellent musician. Well, I am going to leave this for now, waiting tomorrow to tell you that I am clean, I apologize for the length of this story and I would very much like to read them all..
Thank you very much really!
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