The Road back to Good Times - Restoring Back to Factory Resets

Aryan

Member
@WinkTinkTillium - Yes, this book is pure gold. I wish I had discovered it much earlier.

I too have a similar story with walking. Every day I say to my mind that I am going for a 5-minute walk after dinner, but I end up doing 25–30 minutes, and I have now been doing it for the last 20–25 days. You just have to show up and create the environment and things will start happening on their own.

The same is true for meditation; I began with a 5-10 minute routine and am now doing 25-30 minutes.

I mostly do guided meditation-sometimes I focus on breath, sometimes on music (mostly meditative), sometimes a simple body scan meditation , and mostly I just see my thoughts like a watcher on the hills. Somedays I have a good meditative session, and somedays I feel like I have a big mountain to move.

Meditation for me is relaxation, so it gives you calmness and it enables you to understand yourself better by understanding your thoughts, feelings, etc.

If you are looking to start, I would suggest starting with guided meditations. That's the easiest way to start. 90% of the time I do guided meditation as well. You can try using the free version of the Insight Timer app. You will find a number of short meditations like 5 minutes , 10 minutes, etc.

Breathing exercises, also known as Pranayams (in India), a part of Yoga, have lots of positive benefits. I am very new to it, so I will answer this after getting some first-hand experience.

Btw few month back I visited a doctor for my porn-induced ED, he has suggested doing KapalBharti daily as this exercise can help in treating ED and has numerous other positive benefits. It is best known for strengthening the functions of the liver and kidneys.


* Kapalbhati Pranayama (kah-pah-luh-bah-tee prah-nah-yah-muh) is a yogic breathing technique. It consists of short, powerful exhalations and gentle inhales. This breathing technique internally tones and cleanses the respiratory system of toxins.
 

Aryan

Member
[ Day-20 ]

It was an easy day. Temptations are there, but I have enough on my table to keep myself busy.

My entire focus is to add new mini-habits that will help me to completely get rid of all PMO and other distractions like social media, toxic news channels, etc.

1. Experimented with some yoga poses to improve strength and flexibility.

2. I am now in the routine of doing daily meditation and walking. Its almost 20 days-will consider it a habit if I am able to do it for 90 days without fail .. and then for life (dreaming big) .

3. I've started devoting 10-15 minutes per day to Pranayam (breathing exercises) and hope to make it a habit.Let's see how far I can take it.
 

WinkTinkTillium

Active Member
Amazing shares! Day 20 woot woot! somehow i completely forgot about guided meditations when i was thinking of your post/my response lol. Absolutely incorporating that this week.

The momentum your building is awesome, keep it going!!!
 

Aryan

Member
[ Day 21 ]


Again, an easy day fighting with temptations. Thanks to the timetable/routines I've established for myself to get RID from PMO. The plan is simple: not to get much free time and get distracted. Removing Social Media Apps from my smartphones has greatly aided me in avoiding unnecessary PMO cues.

My morning started with some light stretching exercises (yoga) for 10–15 minutes, followed by breathing exercises for 15 minutes, and guided meditation for 20 minutes. Meditation is now providing me with a natural dopamine high.

So here is my typical day nowadays.

Office: 10:30-7:00 p.m.

7:30pm - 9:00pm : Rest, YouTube, and phone calls with family.


9pm to 9:30pm : Walk after dinner.


9:30pm to 10:30pm : Reading ( Temptations are high at this time since it used to be porn watching time, but since I am managing to replace those thoughts with new ones by reading something new everyday, I am not falling into the temptations. )
 

Aryan

Member
[ Day 22]

It was a normal day with a difficult evening. I was feeling extremely bored sitting at the office in my cabin with my laptop in front of me and my mind was creating all these fantasies.

I almost lost control and opened Twitter and visited the profile of a dominatrix I used to fantasise about, but after scrolling through 1-2 posts, good sense prevailed and I closed the window without hesitation. In the back of my mind, I know I can't waste my 21 days of hard work just for a few moments of relief and some dopamine.

I was feeling low, bored and badly wanted a rush of dopamine. I'm desperate for dopamine, but I got through the night by distracting myself with phone calls, good YouTube videos, walking, and reading a few pages of good content.
 

Awareness

Member
It has taken me worlds further in understanding the neurotransmitter system in the brain. Knowing that I release dopamine just by looking for P, without necessarily having to find it, has helped me significantly.
I take a lot away from your postings and am impressed with your meditation routine.
 

Aryan

Member
@Awareness : Thanks for your kind words.

And that's a great insight. I have read something similar somewhere in the past too,that dopamine is also released when our mind anticipates a reward without necessarily Having it.

How does this work for you exactly for P ?
 

Awareness

Member
@Awareness : Thanks for your kind words.

And that's a great insight. I have read something similar somewhere in the past too,that dopamine is also released when our mind anticipates a reward without necessarily Having it.

How does this work for you exactly for P ?
I had a bad example just a few moments ago. I went on reddit and went through the posts - not because I'm that interessted in what's on reddit, of course, but to "accidentally" come across something - something like that, for me, if not immediatly, acutally always leads to a relapse a day or two afterwards - see my post...
 

Aryan

Member
I had a bad example just a few moments ago. I went on reddit and went through the posts - not because I'm that interessted in what's on reddit, of course, but to "accidentally" come across something - something like that, for me, if not immediatly, acutally always leads to a relapse a day or two afterwards - see my post...
Yes, you never know from where the mind gets cues and it starts working to fulfil its cravings. I understand that boredom is one of the main reasons the mind is always on the lookout to do something interesting.

For instance, I know I am not going to go for any PMO and will not visit any of the porn websites. So nowadays, my mind always tries to search for something similar on other platforms too, where it will find something similar of interest.

For example, after deleting Instagram, I realised I had begun spending time on Tinder, which I had not used in months before that.
 

Aryan

Member
[Day 23]

Again, a difficult evening after work. I was bored and feeling a little lonely. There was a strong urge for M as my mind was continuously creating fantasies and urge for the old ways. Somehow, I was successfully able to manage it by diverting my mind by watching a movie on Netflix and going for a stroll.
 

Aryan

Member
[ Day 24 ]

Nothing much to report. The urge to M was still strong in the evening after work. I successfully distracted my mind by going for a short walk after dinner and then some binge watching on Netflix.

I was not able to sleep easily, so I did some guided Yog Nindra Meditation, also known as "yogic sleep" or "effortless relaxation", which helped me get some good quality sleep.
 

downhillfromhere

Well-Known Member
Really great work here, I think you can go far! It’s good that you’re controlling your social media use, that’s been a great help to me as well. The mindless scrolling where I subconsciously want to find something that will act as a substitute for P - cutting that out is really helping me not to get lost in thoughts or fantasies either.
 

Aryan

Member
Really great work here, I think you can go far! It’s good that you’re controlling your social media use, that’s been a great help to me as well. The mindless scrolling where I subconsciously want to find something that will act as a substitute for P - cutting that out is really helping me not to get lost in thoughts or fantasies either.
Thanks @downhillfromhere Yes Scrolling i believe is the worst addiction of our generation. It's the biggest time killer. And thanks to Behaviour science , today each web Platform is built in such a way that user get addicted to scroll more and more.
 

Aryan

Member
[Day 25] - Relapsed

Sunday is always the most difficult day for me. For the last 3 weeks, I was able to get myself distracted from PMO. However, last night I was stressed due to some personal issues and my willpower failed. I didn't open any porn websites but watched a few videos on Youtube that were like substitutes for porn, which made the cravings super intense and a lot of mind porn started happening in my brain.

And I couldn't resist and M. felt really bad after that, as I was really close to the 30 day mark and it was the biggest streak of my life without M.

Time to re-start again from Day 1.
 

Awareness

Member
[Day 25] - Relapsed

Sunday is always the most difficult day for me. For the last 3 weeks, I was able to get myself distracted from PMO. However, last night I was stressed due to some personal issues and my willpower failed. I didn't open any porn websites but watched a few videos on Youtube that were like substitutes for porn, which made the cravings super intense and a lot of mind porn started happening in my brain.

And I couldn't resist and M. felt really bad after that, as I was really close to the 30 day mark and it was the biggest streak of my life without M.

Time to re-start again from Day 1.
It's strong that you're not lying to yourself with the YouTube videos and have been open on this forum.
You've come so far and you'll make it to 30 days - we'll start the journey together!
 

Aryan

Member
It's strong that you're not lying to yourself with the YouTube videos and have been open on this forum.
You've come so far and you'll make it to 30 days - we'll start the journey together!
Thanks @Awareness .


That's the best part about this forum. You don't have to lie. It's the place where you write both about your success and failure, and people are never judgmental. And buddies like you make this forum so special. Let's start the new journey and let's hope we will do 30 days this time, without fail.
 

forceisstrong2

Active Member
[Day 25] - Relapsed

Sunday is always the most difficult day for me. For the last 3 weeks, I was able to get myself distracted from PMO. However, last night I was stressed due to some personal issues and my willpower failed. I didn't open any porn websites but watched a few videos on Youtube that were like substitutes for porn, which made the cravings super intense and a lot of mind porn started happening in my brain.

And I couldn't resist and M. felt really bad after that, as I was really close to the 30 day mark and it was the biggest streak of my life without M.

Time to re-start again from Day 1.
Hey man,

You're being too hard on yourself. In my opinion, watching a few youtube videos is not the same as watching porn at all. This is just a minor blip on your journey. Learn from the experience and keep going - you're doing great. And yeah, I find weekends to be a bitch too! Without the structure of work porn does its damndest to fill the void. It's important to fill weekends with lots of activities, social ones, meeting people, etc!!!
 

Aryan

Member
Hey man,

You're being too hard on yourself. In my opinion, watching a few youtube videos is not the same as watching porn at all. This is just a minor blip on your journey. Learn from the experience and keep going - you're doing great. And yeah, I find weekends to be a bitch too! Without the structure of work porn does its damndest to fill the void. It's important to fill weekends with lots of activities, social ones, meeting people, etc!!!
@forceisstrong2 : Hey yes, agreed , it's a minor blip and I am continuing the journey with even more passion and willpower. Although I fapped. However looking for the positive : resisting it for 24 days is a big achievement for me.

Great points on filling the weekend with activities, meetings, etc. I will surely try to do this by this weekend.
 
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