Taking the High Road


Active Member
I might've spoken too soon, the urge got me going through some X rated movies, this escalated and yesterday I relapsed.

I'm pretty happy though, here's why:

While relapsing the P didn't seem to have any value to me, it's just the thing my brain is addicted to. I didn't seem to like it, the way that I thought I liked it previously. This is a major improvement for me.

I've realized that this is more of a conditioning than something else. This is good, because this I can deal with. The major issue for this was the 'just one peek'

I've also patched all mediums that allowed me to have access to P. If you're using Chrome, consider switching over to Brave.

This happened on Day 17, for the past almost two months I got just two relapses - this is a major improvement for me, reaching this from a 3-4 days / week cycle.

Also, the past times that I have relapsed I was pretty upset with myself and got all these thoughts of doom and gloom.

Now this is not the case, I'm pretty happy and confident with myself. This is the best thing that I can confirm about myself.

This is more a war than just a single battle. I might've lost some ground but this is not the case, I believe that I've gained much needed knowledge about the enemy (myself) and now their tricks won't work anymore.

With this being said, there's still much to do. I'll be driving to work today and I'm pretty chill.

Will be updating tonight guys, I guess I'll reset the counter as well. As I'm writing this I'm on day 46 with just two relapses.

Feels great, cheers :)
Good thing that you've learned from it, sho0fl!

The bad side is that, even though you didn't enjoy it, you are going to get through some cravings again on the next days, because of the dopamine flush. But, since you experienced vividly that you don't really get any pleasure from porn, this gives you great reasons to feel truly happy while rejecting the next temptations.

I'm glad with that. Also, it's good that you're taking measures not do it again, like you said about the browser.

Wish you get better from the chill, man!


Active Member
Thanks for the support, no cravings for today but I guess they'll be coming.

It's something that I know how to deal with now and I'm glad about that.


Active Member
Day 1 or day 47 since I started

Feeling pretty chill today, gym, talked casually with colleagues, some learning.

I've limited how P can get to me pretty hard now and given it a thought about what happened.

Will be reading today, but overall I feel pretty good now. I think that it is mostly to the part about realizing what I'm against and feeling that I can beat it.

Also, this is not my main focus, my main focus is to get my life together in the upcoming months and I can see how the pieces all fit together gradually.


Active Member
Day 2 or day 48 since I started

Todays was a great day, gym, work. Talked a lot with colleagues and felt great. Actually felt the realization that I don't need P at all. Getting social is awesome.

Will be studying some today and will be reading philosophy.

Cheers guys!


Active Member
Day 3 or 49 since I started

Felt great going to the office and socializing more. Thing is, when you get out there and talk with people you realize that it is worth so much more than staying alone at home. This, in addition to all the information to help with this addiction, realizing what it is and being motivated to become more social all helps to clear your mind.

So I feel really great now. Will be studying and going off to bed.


Active Member
Day 5 or 51 since I started

Fought a couple of urges yesterday.

Guys, if you're browsing to buy some stuff and you happen to go to Etsy, don't browse their comment section, there's some pretty explicit stuff there. I'm just glad I got out of the site as quick as I could.

Anyway, I'd like to share a YouTube video, it might bring some hope for people. Let's also say that it's Christian oriented, but overall has a very good vibe.

I'm updating slightly earlier today, will be going out tonight but I've made sure to limit all negative aspects that might come up.

I've also been struggling with boredom. I mean, I can study and go out and what not, but from time to time BOREDOM IS KILLING ME. I'm pretty sure it's just the dopamine craving that my brain is having and this is in turn generating all those urges to watch P or sexy pixels. Will try to think how I can deal with this and I guess it's just individual for everyone.

As for today it's the standard routine. I've also watched a lot of improving my posture today and I'll be getting into advancing this for myself. Feels great to spend time to improve yourself on areas that you haven't and I think that the P monster has been limiting me and taking away this from me subconsciously. No more.

Cheers guys :)


Active Member
Day 6 or 52 since I started

Usual day, got better at the Gym I believe, which is something great. My hope with this is that by the time I'm rebooted I would look better than now ;)

Today I've been thinking about the entire situation. I mean, from the start of this stuff, when I was little, up through my teens, and now in my late 20s. It's a big mess, but it's my mess.

Realizing how much it took from me I can only get more motivated to press on. That being said, talking with people in social environments at work is really inspiring.

In other words, I'm in a good mood to clean this my mess.

Yesterday I also managed to finish a milestone in my readings. As it's philosophy I guess that this is what motivated me to think about myself today.

Finally, I've had a really nice dream. It was about traveling on a train and meeting a girl that I fancied. My brain made it so that the girl is friendly to me and I woke up as usual, nothing happened in the dream apart from a couple of smiles. But I can be certain of something else... kind of strange if I think about it. It was how I felt back in high school when I was in love (as cringy as it might sound). I'm guessing my brain produced something for itself with this little event. I felt like sharing this, it made be feel really good about myself.

It also made me want this in reality as well. I guess my brain wants out of this mess as well.

So fuck P. I want more out of live, and I'm coming to get it.


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Day 7, a new week :) or 53 since I started

Interesting night, I had 4 dreams. I remember just one which involved a tall building (like a cathedral) which bases collapsed, was flooded and me and a team of other people rowed a boat into.

No urges to watch P. I've been thinking about some of the P I've watched over the years and felt nothing towards it. It was like 'meh, whatever'. I would say this is a big progress for me. For the past 53 days since I started I had two relapses and watched P twice. The last time I watched P I also felt this nothingness and not being interested, it seemed more of a 'thing that I do' than 'I like doing this because...'. I guess I'm starting to pull my sh*t together. Feels nice.

Also feels kind of boring. I mean BOOORING. Not much interesting stuff to do today. Did home gym, other exercises, drove to work, chatted with people but I've been mostly bored. Not sure if I'm burning out or something but whatever. If I rid myself of P for good f*ck it, let's do it.

Also, I think I'm getting the 'flatline', but who knows. Will be reading today and helping a friend later today.

Cheers guys.


Active Member
Day 8 or 54 since I started

I've had a couple of dreams this night as well. Not romantic, neither scary ones, but can't remember any now.

Woke up, morning woods are still persistent, I mean throughout all of the last 54 days I can't remember a morning waking up without.

On the other activities, gym, work, studying, shopping, walking - I'm feeling something that I can only relate as apathy and boredom. I am guessing this is what a low dopamine feels like. Awesome! I'm doing something :). Or at least that's what I keep saying.

Also, I'm guessing that I'm also experiencing the flatline. Yeah, pretty much that's what it is. But, this I think is to my advantage. It's my smoky tunnel through this mess, the only way out I think. There ain't others so I can only go forward through it. Fine, let's walk.

Along with this I have been thinking again for some P that I've watched over the years. Usually, I would get a buzz in me when even having those thoughts, let's say when I haven't watched P for a day or two. But now, oh man, no such buzzes. Just apathy towards it. I've tried to remember a lot of P or 2d erotica and... nothing! I'm even wondering why did I watch this.

This I think is something that's mentioned in EasyPeasy - that it usually takes 3 weeks. For me it might've took a little while longer, 54 days it seems with two relapses but oh well.

So this apathy, flatline, boredom, call it whatever, is definitely something that I'm enjoying.

This goes with saying that even fantasies are kind of fading. They do exist, but they're fantasies about the future and how I'd go out on dates. No erotic stuff either.

In my free time I've took it to read some mythology. Would like to have stories and be able to increase my story telling skill.

I'm seeing progress, good stuff. Cheers guys!


Active Member
Day 9 or 55 since I started

Since the dream reel has started rolling it just won't stop. Feels awesome, I'm getting two or more dreams per day.

One of the dreams was playing with my imagination and I figured I was in a big castle, like one you would find in a movie like Beauty and the Beast (think old school version). Was nice, just exploring and I had this feeling that I'm the owner of that castle. After some time I felt a presence that threatened me. This is where the trail of this dream grows cold.

The next I don't remember but I can definitely remember the last one. It involved a cute girl that wasn't that friendly to me but fancied me either way. She had troubles and was running away so I offered refuge and we begun running away together. Before you get any ideas that's where I woke up.

Alright, if you're not into reading Freud I can add my knowledge here - running from something usually means I have some unfinished business. If it was a house it would usually indicate a safe place. As it's an unknown castle, that I felt good in, it means new safety is found. To sum, my interpretation of this is that there's a new safe heaven for me, given I finish an unfinished deed. Care to guess what that is?

The girl part I fathom is separated into two parts. Just as girls usually have the tendency of wanting to be mothers, men usually have the feeling of wanting to protect something, hey, the dream made the perfect setup for this. The obvious fact, that there was a girl, would indicate that I'm lonely and long for this - true.

Alright, let's get to how my day went :D

Standard routine (Gym -> Food -> Work -> writing this -> will be studying). Got morning wood, although, I have noticed that my previous days the little guy was rising stronger. Now it's just, meh, here's some blood but not that much.

I am feeling a mighty apathy towards stuff that I find boring. I find a lot of things boring these days. Dopamine being low?

I have also tried to remember P that my brain would find interesting and driven towards. I don't know what it is, but oh man, I don't feel anything towards it. This goes with saying that I'm not that stupid to think I've won the war or something. You never know when the P monster will strike. But I enjoy this serenity for now, although it also involves this apathy. And if I can keep not giving a f*ck for P or any sexy pixels I'm in a good spot. If not, I'm pretty conscious now to know what's happening.

I've also read more mythology, will be studying today and I'm also seeing progress there as well. Actually, on a lot of fronts which can only inspire me to add on top of this.

Feels good today guys, ignore the apathy and all. Cheers


Active Member
Day 10 or 56 since I started

Two more dreams this night, they just keep rolling. Can't remember them though.

Other than that a standard day as well. More boredom, more apathy. I'm noticing that I'm in the gym for longer periods of time now, around 1hr and half. It seems that this is becoming my only source of dopamine which to be honest is a good thing. I'm also advancing there :)

I've got not urges whatsoever either to watch P or to O. I've thought about it and I think it's working to my advantage so far. I'm guessing this 'flatline' situation will clear out eventually. But for now things are going good.

Will be reading a lot in the upcoming week.

Cheers guys


Active Member
Day 11 or 57 since I started

Chill day, no gym today, went shopping and liking my new clothes and how they fit.

Studying, laying, studying, laying... almost half day.

Went on a hike with a friend, was really awesome.

Everything else persist, weak morning woods, dreams, boredom.


Active Member
Day 12 or 58 since I started

Standard routine: Gym -> Studying + Chilling -> Cooking

Will be going for a walk and then reading philosophy / mythology.

Morning woods are noticeable weaker, flatline is pretty much ongoing and the boredom / apathy are my companions as well.

I'll call this progress.