A journal

Winnerwhoabstains

Active Member
Well - I just got pretty upset but stopping by here has helped me detach. I worked REALLY hard on a video for youtube for days and it did poorly - it actually lost me a few subscribers - not an amount that makes any difference. But it shakes my confidence a bit, I worked so hard on it and thought it'd do well. Now I have doubts like not sure if I can make the channel work. Uggghh.

Well, I think posting very often is definitely the way to go - as I REALLY have no idea how things will do until I post them. I absolutely get the best results when I just post lots. Well, I tried something different, it didn't work too well, what am I gonna do.
 

Androg

Administrator
Admin
Moderator
Trust your inner judge, not those outside of you. Social media is notoriously fickle. Worse yet, if your material is something a powerful group wants suppressed...well...there are algorithms for that.
 

Winnerwhoabstains

Active Member
Trust your inner judge, not those outside of you. Social media is notoriously fickle. Worse yet, if your material is something a powerful group wants suppressed...well...there are algorithms for that.
Quite true, yeah I am viewing it as a job as it's not totally free in terms of what material can be posted. I think posting more often helps me a good bit
 

Winnerwhoabstains

Active Member
Well, I guess I haven't been around as much lately - but I'll give myself credit for consistently coming back and not say disappearing.

I had some lapses a few days ago - I was feeling massive fear of failure and like dread and hopeless - just tons of fear. That led to it I'd say. So I MO'd for the three days in a row, but hey - the lapses have been less intense.

I also got an opportunity to rewire recently. A bit of cuddling and kissing - which I think really helps me to abstain.


I am focused on controlling my mind and thinking positive now, which I think is important and something to work on. I am liking it, just focus on what I want and what I could benefit.
 

Winnerwhoabstains

Active Member
Hmm - a bit up and down. I got too excited by a girl then too let down when it did not work out. Threw me off a bit - but I was productive yesterday and today I have been not following the schedule but taking only positive actions at least.
 

Winnerwhoabstains

Active Member
Followed a full schedule today and it worked out very well. I also did yoga in the morning so I could play team sports tonight - I was really craving that stimulation and excitement - it was great
 
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