This little devil is getting back on me

Wolfmother

Member
Haven't watched porn in over a year, and I still don't. But I have been searching for nudes online and stuff, and even when I'm doing it, I feel like it ain't what I wanna do, but I still end up doing it and feeling even more guilty. Still haven't watched porn, but searching for nudes of random women on the internet does not sound good. What I want is real stuff, and I still end up checking stuff out on the internet. Makes me feel like shit, and I definitely don't enjoy it. Thanks for reading!
 

sho0fl

Member
Hey Wolfmother,

You're doing great, an entire year - good job!

I think that limiting any pixel related turn-on might be beneficial for you.

Before going that way though - why did you decide to quit and how did you envision the road ahead last year?
How do you envision the future road as well?
What do you wish to achieve by quitting?
 

Wolfmother

Member
Hey Wolfmother,

You're doing great, an entire year - good job!

I think that limiting any pixel related turn-on might be beneficial for you.

Before going that way though - why did you decide to quit and how did you envision the road ahead last year?
How do you envision the future road as well?
What do you wish to achieve by quitting?
Thanks man! Hope you're doing great too!
Yeah limiting the pixels is the aim, just seems a little difficult now idk why.


The reason? Limp noodle haha. I was getting it on with my girlfriend and I couldn't get much of an erection, but with porn it was hard as a rock. Searched around a bit and I figured I had PIED, that was more than enough for me to quit porn.

Few months into quitting porn, I realized I wasn't doing it cause I wanted to, more of like it became a habit. And after a while I thought; why watch two people have sex when I can get it myself? Made no sense watching it. Never watched it after that.

I haven't watched porn in over a year, but for the future? Quitting the search for random nudes on the internet.

Why did I quit or why I want to? Cause I feel it's waste of time when I actually meet real people and feel stuff fr

Hope it's going great for you too! Cheers
 

sho0fl

Member
Can absolutely agree with you, once a person expands their horizons they realize what they can achieve. I'm doing better than reading your thoughts on the matter.

I'm also in this mostly for the ED, but overall I see a lot of benefits as well.

For limiting the online activity I can say that for me using OpenDNS, ColdTurkey works really good so far.

I've also identified some 'cues' that I had. For example, when I'm alone at night I get this feeling that 'oh you know what you should do', then think about what this is - it's really not going to do me any good and I don't want it, it's just so that I'm used so much to this that this craving comes up. So after I am in the clear of what's going on I can deal with it easily.
 

Wolfmother

Member
Can absolutely agree with you, once a person expands their horizons they realize what they can achieve. I'm doing better than reading your thoughts on the matter.

I'm also in this mostly for the ED, but overall I see a lot of benefits as well.

For limiting the online activity I can say that for me using OpenDNS, ColdTurkey works really good so far.

I've also identified some 'cues' that I had. For example, when I'm alone at night I get this feeling that 'oh you know what you should do', then think about what this is - it's really not going to do me any good and I don't want it, it's just so that I'm used so much to this that this craving comes up. So after I am in the clear of what's going on I can deal with it easily.
Yeah exactly, the same thing. When I'm alone at night, this feeling just comes in to check out stuff on the internet. It's not that I want it, but that I'm alone and I have nothing else to do, so I'll just browse about things that aren't in anyways good for me.

Really helps when I'm out with my friends and I don't check out my phone. I love being outdoors and I rarely use my phone then.

Always was huge on sports, especially football, so when ever I'm out, playing football, these feelings never pop up.

But once I'm alone and I have nothing to do, especially at night lying on bed, you start feeling these things. I'm aware that it isn't of any use to me, but years of checking stuff out does get to you.


Thanks for the blocker recommendations! Will try!

What do you do get your mind away from all these unnecessary thoughts?
 

Wolfmother

Member
Another day, went pretty good. I think my crazy days are over, when you're just starting your reboot and you crave P. I remember my flatline, it was really bad.

But after a few months, you kinda get a sense of clarity about P. I just got more aware about what it was, and why I was watching it, it never became an issue after that.

It's definitely not the greatest feeling in the world when you can't get hard in front of someone you find crazy attractive.

But I'm glad that happened. That happened, and I quit porn.

Too bad that I needed a limp noodle to be aware of how it was affecting me though.
 

sho0fl

Member
Yeah exactly, the same thing. When I'm alone at night, this feeling just comes in to check out stuff on the internet. It's not that I want it, but that I'm alone and I have nothing else to do, so I'll just browse about things that aren't in anyways good for me.
Stop your phone's internet. Download a book, read it. Identify this as for what it is, a cue. It's not that you want it, it's that you're used to it. After you realize this you might have an easier time dealing with it.

What do you do get your mind away from all these unnecessary thoughts?
Multiple things. I'm using my own advise above, I know what I'm dealing with and I've thought it through on what I wish to achieve, how those actions are driving in the other way and are only slowing me down.

When I get a queue that I have recognized I am saying to myself: What did I wish to do - ah yes, remove this from my life for my own reasons. Is this going to help me? - no it will not. Why, then indulge in it? Say no, one cue, at a time.

As for hobbies - I read a lot. And in the meantime I've said to myself that I will expand on things I wish to be better at, so that when I get out of this mess that I made for myself I'll have something to work with when I wish to get into dating, etc...

It's definitely not the greatest feeling in the world when you can't get hard in front of someone you find crazy attractive.
Been there, done that. One of my main reasons for doing this, initially. Now I think there are way more benefits.
 

Wolfmother

Member
Stop your phone's internet. Download a book, read it. Identify this as for what it is, a cue. It's not that you want it, it's that you're used to it. After you realize this you might have an easier time dealing with it.


Multiple things. I'm using my own advise above, I know what I'm dealing with and I've thought it through on what I wish to achieve, how those actions are driving in the other way and are only slowing me down.

When I get a queue that I have recognized I am saying to myself: What did I wish to do - ah yes, remove this from my life for my own reasons. Is this going to help me? - no it will not. Why, then indulge in it? Say no, one cue, at a time.

As for hobbies - I read a lot. And in the meantime I've said to myself that I will expand on things I wish to be better at, so that when I get out of this mess that I made for myself I'll have something to work with when I wish to get into dating, etc...


Been there, done that. One of my main reasons for doing this, initially. Now I think there are way more benefits.
Yeah, been reading alot these days. Excessive screen time always seems to be a problem for me.

Yeah, exactly. Being aware of the situation and doing what I want to do instead of doing something because I'm used to doing it.

Life is so much better without P, it was a waste of time.

You're probably getting out of this mess soon, cheers man
 

Wolfmother

Member
Day idk what it is; over a year.

Getting on this forum has helped me so much, it feels alot better seeing everyone's stories and support, makes me feel like I can get over this soon.

Today was a pretty boring day, went for a walk, got a few supplies for home, studied a bit.

And I've been having crazy dreams in the last 2-3 days, wet dreams are a mess.
 

Wolfmother

Member
I ended up searching for weird nudes on Reddit. Closed it right when I saw it and realised that I wasn't doing what I wanted to.

I end up peeking at nudes one way or the other, and the blocker seems to stop working and I have to reinstall it everytime that happens.

I'm completely aware of the fact that whatever I'm searching for is of no use to me and is a waste of time. It's not a real person I know of and that I can enjoy company with, but just pixels on a screen. And I still end up searching for it.

This is definitely going to be the last time that happens.
 

Wolfmother

Member
WHAT IS THE POINT OF WATCHING P? OR ANYTHING RELATED ON THE INTERNET


Definitely not happy about my slip up. It's just pathetic. We're watching stuff on the internet, pixels, that aren't real or in front of us. It's one sided. We're the only participants.

They're just pixels and there's no one on the other side or with us.

It's a waste of time looking at this, pixels, flashing lights on screens, all by ourselves, alone.


What pisses me off is that I'm aware of what it is and how it affects me, and I still end up looking for it.

This needs to stop.
 

sho0fl

Member
I think that it might be the 'cues' that are referred to. Your brain just needs to watch those to get dopamine and it is conditioned to do.

To limit this, try removing all ways that you will allow you to watch them. Shut off your Phone's internet, download a book prior to it and just read. This helps for me.
 

Wolfmother

Member
I think that it might be the 'cues' that are referred to. Your brain just needs to watch those to get dopamine and it is conditioned to do.

To limit this, try removing all ways that you will allow you to watch them. Shut off your Phone's internet, download a book prior to it and just read. This helps for me.
Yeah exactly, I feel the same. I end up watching it just to get a hit when I'm completely aware that this isn't what I want. Need to get rid of it.


I got the blocker installed again, but when your country gives really cheap internet and all of your classes are online, it's hard.

Thanks for the help, how's it going for you?
 

sho0fl

Member
I would say good, although I also have this conditioning that needs to be removed. I'm working on that by just identifying what I think are cues and then thinking about them, then recalling why I don't want them and doing nothing about it.
 

Wolfmother

Member
Same thing man, we'll all get rid of them soon! Stay strong!
I would say good, although I also have this conditioning that needs to be removed. I'm working on that by just identifying what I think are cues and then thinking about them, then recalling why I don't want them and doing nothing about it.
 

Wolfmother

Member
DAY IDK OVER A YEAR

Today was good, no peaking at nudes, no nothing. I was totally aware of what I wanted and what I didn't want and I never went after what I knew I would regret about later.

Woke up early, spent alot of time studying, saw my friends, went to the beach, walked and got back home.
 

Wolfmother

Member
DAY I STILL DON'T KNOW WHICH IT IS I LOST COUNT A LONG TIME AGO

Today was the same as yesterday. Had alot to study, met my friends, ate really well.

Visited the beach cause there are many beaches near me. Took a walk, got back home.

And no peeking today either, no sir!
 

Wolfmother

Member
DAY; I'LL NEVER KNOW WHICH DAY IT IS

Well I've got nothing much to say. Getting on this forum definitely has it's benefits and reading about other people and their experiences really help.

I find that it's easier to not go back to the screen, even for a silly nude or checking out someone on social media.

I mean, doesn't even make any sense to check someone or something out on screen when they have no idea of your existence?

I'd rather meet people in person than stare at screens, it's such a waste of time.

But I'm really busy these days with a really important exam around the corner so meeting new people, ie, girls is hard. I spend most of time trying to study, but I do see my friends everyday.

We're all gonna make it! Cheers!
 
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