Enough is enough

Galatians51

Galatians51

Active Member
day 16

woke up early this morning in a middle of a very "stimulating" dream...

I've read a lot of posts where guys have shared positive sentiment about dreams like that and their "morning wood"... for me it's the opposite, I wake up from that feeling super tempted to go look at something online.

I didn't give in, but I hate that feeling of wanting to go look online.

Not going to let that ruin my day - so here is to a great Sunday!
 
Galatians51

Galatians51

Active Member
day 17

When I started this a couple weeks ago I had been reading YBOP every day, but I didn't read any last week, I think that's again because of this "false" confidence that I get after I haven't looked at anything for a couple weeks. I'm going to read some articles today, I think that will help me stay motivated - the more I understand how our brains are affected by all this.

Have a great day.
 
Blondie

Blondie

Respected Member
Galatians51 said:
but I didn't read any last week, I think that's again because of this "false" confidence that I get after I haven't looked at anything for a couple weeks.
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This got me for a very long time. The first thing to understand is just to be aware of it. Nice job!

Have a great day.
 
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Galatians51

Galatians51

Active Member
day 18

I watched a 1 hour video from YBOP this morning, a lot of it was repeat information, but still good to reinforce the concepts I've learned. If anybody has any articles or videos that has helped you stay clean, let me know.
 
Blondie

Blondie

Respected Member
Hey @Galatians51, I think this is great that you're trying to keep watching and reading things that keep you in the game - this is so important. It's so easy to get complacent in this and slip before we know it. Being here and just watching things will keep you motivated through the good and the bad days.

I love this video, and Terry Crews is pretty cool. It's a great interview. Best to you brother.
 
Beautiful1973

Beautiful1973

Active Member
@Galatians51 I absolutely love the Consider before Consuming podcast by Fight the New Drug, it’s a mix of personal accounts, science, facts, but also the darker side of porn like sexual exploitation and sex trafficking, it’s really educational and I could never go back to being ‘OK’ with porn after what I’ve learnt.
I’ll put the link to the episode Gabe Deem did, as it’s the one that really hit home with my man, but they are all fantastic and I’ve listened to every single one over the last few months.
podcasts.apple.com

‎Consider Before Consuming: Gabe Deem: Founder of Reboot Nation, Activist, & Former Porn Addict on Apple Podcasts

‎Show Consider Before Consuming, Ep Gabe Deem: Founder of Reboot Nation, Activist, & Former Porn Addict - 3 Nov 2020
podcasts.apple.com
 
Galatians51

Galatians51

Active Member
@Blondie @Beautiful1973 thank you both! I will check those out in the morning.

Blondie said:
I think this is great that you're trying to keep watching and reading things that keep you in the game - this is so important. It's so easy to get complacent in this and slip before we know it. Being here and just watching things will keep you motivated through the good and the bad days.
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Thanks man, I appreciate your insight and encouragement. I don't want to get complacent - that's fore sure.

Have a great night
 
N

Nick2001

New Member
Galatians51 said:
Day 11

I've been at this point so many times, I start to feel invincible, like I'll never look at p again. Maybe that's been the reason I have slipped up so many times around this point. At this point I start to feel like pmo is thing of the past, is that even something I ever did? I think because of this feeling I would start to let my guard down, maybe browse some youtube videos, watch movies with triggers in it... and for a while, maybe even a few days of being a little less careful i'm ok, but eventually a trigger hits and I slip back and relapse for a day or two, then repeat the cycle. That cycle has been going for years.

I'm just writing this here to remind myself today. Day 11 feels great, but i'm not invincible, I can't loosen the grip on the steering wheel that keeps me moving straight ahead. The moment I start to get careless is the path back to pmo. And any time i have gone back to pmo, i feel like a complete piece of garbage and a fraud.

That's exactly how I felt 11 days ago. Typically after 1 or 2 days after pmo I still feel like garbage because of it, but I at least feel like i'm coming out of it and am extremely vigilant to be careful to avoid triggers, or to respond to them better. It's almost as if I wish that feeling would stay with me - that feeling of I have to run from this dangerous situation to get to safety... because once I get to safety, I can let my guard down and relax a bit.

I'm writing this to remind myself that despite the safety I'm starting to feel, danger lurks all around me. I have to stay vigilant.


Thank you all that have been commenting or liking my posts, it really helps knowing I'm not alone in this.
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Keep going man! You’re inspiring!
 
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