6 Months Clean: A (Partial) Success Story

TryingHarder

Well-Known Member
According to my calculations, I am now 6 months free of PMO.

This beats my previous clean streak of 5 months, so I'm feeling good. However, I'm certainly not out of the woods yet.

Many of you are wondering "how do other people do it? Why can't I quit?"

There's no single answer for those questions. For me, it really boiled down to old fashioned willpower and discipline. Every day I tell myself that I will never look at porn again, no matter what. Instead of responding to the siren call of porn, I conjure up the grotesque and disturbing image of me fapping in front of my computer. I remind myself, that at age 53, I more or less have only one more chance to get clean and stay clean.

I'm less concerned about the quality and frequency of my erections as I am about freeing my mind from the tangled world of porn and weird sexual thoughts that are really depression and mental illness speaking instead of my libido.

So I'm still struggling, but after 25 years of a porn addiction, I'm headed in the right direction.

Stay strong and stay clean, everyone. Do whatever it takes to bust up your usual routines and habits that lead you back to porn.
 

TryingHarder

Well-Known Member
Just curious TH, have you seen any noticeable improvements in your sexual functioning?
Since I'm not currently sexually active (single), can't really say for sure. At the moment, my erections are unfortunately unreliable when I attempt to MO. However, unlike younger rebooters, I am mainly focused on what a porn addiction has done to me mentally and not worrying so much about the PIED.
 

Daybyday1988

Active Member
I understand. I'm sure your boners will be back soon but that's also a good reason to quit. Have you read up about PAWS? Post acute withdrawal syndrome?
 
Thank you for sharing your story. I am struggling with the mental aspect, too. I feel down and anxious even though everything in my life is okay. I’m trying to practice gratitude and count my blessings to stay upbeat but know I’m currently in a little funk. The good news is I’m not having porn dreams or visions as easily as I used to, so I think my brain is moving forward. But this flatline funk is a bitch.
 
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