celibate's journal

day 125
I might temporarily stop trying to communicate as a substitute for flirting. It's difficult for me to find recipients who won't promote sex or sexuality, especially since some societies and groups seem to hinder my ability to find such people. I have been trying to communicate on a private chat website that markets therapy, but like many online communities, it seems to have a lot of perverts continually banning me.

If I feel like communicating so badly, maybe I can reconsider talking with a therapist. But I already read many instances where therapists were not worth the money. Unless I come across an asexual therapist or a therpist who dislikes sex, I'll likely just be paying for only nods and little positive communication.

I do realize that my communication might be best when there is no middleman or person between me and the recipient. For example, the therapy website may have some bot or code that automatically bans me if enough perverts block me. But if I just went outside to talk to people, I doubt I'd have to worry too much about perverts hindering my ability to communicate. I live in a land with Freedom of Speech and Press.

If I plan to communicate, I should (1) write a plan before communicating and (2) try to avoid services and third parties that may hinder my communication. If I plan to communicate with people, I should try to communicate with them directly through in-person oral communication instead of through a website or phone service that may hinder my communication.

Maybe I can try to communicate with people via volunteering. I remember volunteering at a park and having some nice communications with people. I didn't feel strange and the people weren't too offended by me. There is still the issue of meeting people who might promote sex. And the organization facilitating the volunteering is a third party that may hinder my communication.

Honestly, I may be best at handing out cards to people who may seem less sexual. I know I can distribute cards to at least one demographic that's believed to have a low sexuality. (And no, it's not women or kids but rather another demographic that's believed to have a low sexuality.)

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I went out birding today but attracted some bad attention. I like observing nature. It's a healthier offline hobby than my other hobbies. But I think birding is more appropriate at a park. I live in a crowded area, so there aren't many parks nearby. But I can see myself taking a long walk to a park for birding. I like birding when there aren't much people, flies, and loud music outside. There's a time of day where they are all mostly not around.
 
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