Is it still PI ED? Uncertain as to the causes because they may be unusual

Markos

Member
Hello there, I'm new to the forum. Nice to see you and good luck to everyone!
English is not my first language so please be understanding :)

I'm 33 years old now and I have been suffering from both ED and DE for 10 years. I've spent a lot of money visiting doctors who claimed I'm physically healthy. I have regular morning wood and nothing is wrong with my body. I also cooperated with some psychologists and for them my problem was performance anxiety. But despite the decline in anxiety, the problem persisted... And I still felt there was definitely something else underneath. Something I couldn't understand or explain. As if a split in between real sex experience and masturbation...

After a long time I found out about Porn Induced ED and DE. And everything about that fit to my experience. Decrease in libido, decrease in sexual attraction toward partner who I recognise as attractive, impotence during sex with a real partner, feeling the real sex is somehow 'unnatural' for me, unexplained erectile disfuncions, problems with arousal, lack of spontaneous erection, lack of feelings during penetration and even lack of ejaculation. And finally... no desire even with porn. Just to ble clear: I don't use drugs, cigarettes nor alcohol.

It all fits so much with my problems!

But I'm not quite sure if my ED and DE is actually porn induced. Why? Because my masturbation was very regular for a long time but not as frequent and intense. Two or three times a week, sometimes more often. But mostly two or three times a week. Only 15 minutes each time. One masturbation per day. Most often soft porn (especially my long term favourite movies and actresses), less often stronger, sometimes only photos of models or actresses. So nothing very frequent or intense, I guess.

On the other hand I masturbated regularly from the age of 16 until now. My sexual initiation with a real partner was in the age of 23 because I was so shy. But even if I was in my relationships I always masturbated with the same regularity. And when I figured out I got ED and DE, I preferred masturbation over real sex.

Do you think that my ED and DE is still porn induced despite all differences in detail compared to other cases?

Thank you for your help!
 
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Beautiful1973

Active Member
Welcome @Markos the short answer is YES!
I don't have the 'equipment' to give a personal account, but can speak of what my partners experience was, and it was very similar to yours.
 
Hey Markos,

Like you, I've never been an incredibly frequent porn user, and haven't found myself escalating to more and more stimulating and intense media. I think men in our situation only have to ask ourselves this: do you have strong erections alone when you're touching yourself to porn or porn fantasy?

If the answer is yes, and it doesn't work when you're with a partner, then you're suffering from PIED. Best of luck fighting through this, and know that even if the material you use doesn't feel as extreme to you as the stories of other men, the impact it has on our brains is more or less the same.
 

Markos

Member
Hey Markos,

Like you, I've never been an incredibly frequent porn user, and haven't found myself escalating to more and more stimulating and intense media. I think men in our situation only have to ask ourselves this: do you have strong erections alone when you're touching yourself to porn or porn fantasy?

If the answer is yes, and it doesn't work when you're with a partner, then you're suffering from PIED. Best of luck fighting through this, and know that even if the material you use doesn't feel as extreme to you as the stories of other men, the impact it has on our brains is more or less the same.

Oh, yes, masturbation is much different to me. I can quite easily achieve erection during masturbation with porn. It is harder without porn or erotic pics, of course.

BUT:

1. I've noticed that long-term porn use also desensitizes to masturbation. I find it harder to get aroused and my sex drive is low, I am getting bored and exhausted of porn;

2. Even masturbation could be harder because of anxiety. Not performance anxiety, of course, but anxiety based on the a terrifying question: What is wrong with me? And if you can't get the answer for a long time, and doctors' help turns out to be ineffective, you can start to masturbate for testing yourself and to see if your penis is ok, obsessively observe how long, how hard and how fast I get an erection. And then your masturbation could be blocked by anxiety. It's also my case. But anyway, always erection is possible to get while masturbation. And in the case I can clearly see the connection between an anxiety and erection.
 

Beautiful1973

Active Member
1. I've noticed that long-term porn use also desensitizes to masturbation. I find it harder to get aroused and my sex drive is low, I am getting bored and exhausted of porn;
This is the often why porn consumption escalates as you need more and more novelty material to get aroused……
Yes, thank you, @Beautiful1973 , I would be happy if you could write more :)
What would you like to know, obviously I’d be speaking on my man’s behalf!
 

Markos

Member
This is the often why porn consumption escalates as you need more and more novelty material to get aroused……

What would you like to know, obviously I’d be speaking on my man’s behalf!

1. Does your partner struggled with similar case, I mean not very obsessed by porn but despite that still having problems with ED or DE based on long-term masturbation?

2. What tips would you give someone with this condition to improve his relationship?
 

Beautiful1973

Active Member
Does your partner struggled with similar case, I mean not very obsessed by porn but despite that still having problems with ED or DE based on long-term masturbation?
Yes, he didn’t consume a massive amount, and was into more soft porn, but he was reliant on it to MO and that’s what contributed to the ED & DE.
What tips would you give someone with this condition to improve his relationship?
Oh gosh….. I think the main thing is to focus on the intimacy, be present, live in the moment, try to enjoy the experience of being with your partner rather than putting pressure on yourself to ‘perform’ or focused on orgasm. Take penetration off the table for a while if you have too…. my man and I have had some amazing sex & intimacy with a beautiful soft cock.
There are some lovely connecting tantric practices you can do either alone or with a partner. Lastly just be patient, kind and loving towards yourself and your partner. My man and I are on a journey of discovery too, so I can share more as I learn more.
 
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