Day 31 no P/day 9 no MO
That makes it
30 days porn-free! The first time I've had that since the age of 13!! Thanks to everyone on here, I feel like my mindset and this journal are the two biggest tools I have to stay porn-free at the moment. I especially appreciate everyone who posted in this thread.
I thought about throwing in the towel last night and acting out. That's because I went online to delete the accounts that never got deleted. I'd sent a message to the admin back when I deleted the other accounts but I'd never followed up making sure the accounts got removed. Saw the email this morning that the accounts are gone, removed, erased! It was a bit cavalier to do this by myself so early on in my reboot, but it seems to have ended okay.
I feel like I've unlocked my reasons and desire to quit in my mind. This mindset makes a huge difference to quitting. I'm not focusing on what I'm giving up either. Just living into my new life. My mindset can't perfectly resist the justifications of P use, so I've been avoiding triggers massively. I definitely try not to think about porn, sex, or touch myself in a sexual way. It's just like I have a wound and am protecting it. I still hope it will heal but sex is the last thing on my mind.
We can do this!