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I started masturbating and watching porn in 2011. I was 21 and had just recently lost my virginity.
I first discovered the nofap movement about three years ago, I learned that masturbating was actually harming me more than it was serving me, as i started jacking off twice and sometimes infinity times a day.

for the first time in 2022, I've managed to stay away from porn and masturbating for this long, it's my 9th day now.
I must admit, It does get challenging, two days ago I woke up and my hand was jacking me off (muscle memory I guess).

I realised what was happening, and quickly stopped myself.

I've reached a point where I have realized that I can't stay on this journey by myself, I don't know who to tell, it feels embarrassing. telling my friends about the struggle that I am facing.

On the positive side, I feel much more confident, and I don't have that guilt when I am in public, that feeling that I used to get, thinking maybe people can smell that I just rubbed one off.

Oh well, I'll post again soon, to update this journal entry.


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Day 10, woke up with hectic morning wood. still haven't caved in. before, I couldn't even get out of bed before watching some P and MO'ing. I replaced that with music now, I find it much easier to get out of bed when I play some music.

Time to get ready for my day.

oh, mental note: I most definitely have to stop eating junk food.


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After work, I walk to my place (about 10 minutes away). This one girl who's been passing me by and would usually say hello.
Well, today she stopped her ebike and introduced herself. She starts talking to me in Chinese and I tell her I don't understand what she's saying (I'm in China by the way).

Then, something happened that hasn't happened in a while, when I asked for her contacts, I got this massive massive boner:ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:. To avoid making things awkward, I quickly saved her contact and told her we'd text (body language) and walked away.

It took like 5 minutes for the boner to go away.

Also, my colleagues (all Chinese women), have started talking to me more, and I noticed that I am making stronger eye contact with them now.

Anyway, Day 11 of NNN: Lets goooooo!!!!


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When I got to the office, I thought to myself, am I abstaining from PMO'ing for the first time because of my sheer willpower (I'm being sarcastic), or am I abstaining from PMO'ing because I have taken a break from Alcohol?

I keep getting flashbacks of all the times that I masturbated at work, I masturbated at all the places I've been employed at (several). I should have realised that that behaviour was not normal back then, but alas, we progress nonetheless, I'd rather look towards the present and future than cry over the past.

Who knows, one thing I do know is that this change is spilling over to the other (bad) habits that have been holding me back, such as eating takeouts every day, smoking, not cleaning my place, not working out, and procrastinating...

I will set goals and create a routine around them soon so that I can start 2023 on the right foot!

I'll post these (goals and routine) in this journal soon.


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Day 12

Still going strong, no morning wood today, I noticed that I have been getting a lot of flashbacks, a lot more than usual, and found it strange. anyway, let's start this day.


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Day 13

I sleep naked most of the time, TMI I know haha. for the past ten years, I'd usually be in the streets drinking/partying up a storm and would only come back home at around 6 / 7 am. since NNN started, I have stopped drinking and going out as I previously mentioned (my family and friends are shocked, I really had a drinking problem).

So last night, I had these urges to PMO, but they were not that hectic, even though I could feel the discomfort in my testes.

I don't want to blow smoke up my ass cause I know this will be a forever struggle, whether I'm 13 days clean or 13 years clean. I have to remember that It was a 10-year problem for me, and also, I need to celebrate each day as a victory in the fight, but the war will never stop with P and M.


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Day 14

A friend called me around the afternoon, saying it's not good to coop myself up in the crib.

ended getting drunk, there were some girls, flirted with a few of them.

went home alone dou:ROFLMAO:.

had this major urge to PMO, but I didn't.

I'm proud of myself, for this small victory.


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Day 15

This is officially my longest streak now.

The longest I've gone was 14 days, but that's because I was in the hospital.
The nurses kept coming in and out so I had limited privacy.

I woke up feeling like I have achieved something, It's great not having a feeling of guilt around your neck.


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Day 16

Had this weird dream where I was PMO'ing, when I awoke, I felt this feeling of dread, I was disappointed in myself.
only to find out it was a dream. I was so relieved.

My dreams as of late are becoming more sexual, still haven't had a wet dream yet.
Sometimes I realise what's going on mid-dream and I wake myself up.

Anyway, let me start my day, forward we move.


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I´ve had exactly the same dream and reaction some weeks ago haha! It´s your mind letting go of the old habits. Keep going! You´re doing great!


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Day 17

Started drinking mid-week again, it's the second time now I've been tipsy and still did not PMO. So Is it safe to say that maybe alcohol was not the trigger? and if not, what actually was the trigger? I think it might have been social media and movies, where sex scenes would trigger me to fap. but now It doesn't really affect me that much because I know how harmful just one time could be.

During this period of NNN, I'm more aware of other possible harmful addictions and or habits, not just alcohol, but social media, junk food, cigarettes, validation, etc.

However, I don't want to trap myself into trying to do too much all at once, for now, I will just focus on not fapping, and soon enough, I'm sure the consistency will spill over and affect my other habits and or addictions in a positive way.

Cheers for now.


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Day 18

Yesterday was tough won't lie, had to fight the urge to M. before I started this journey, I'd need to watch P before M'ing, otherwise, I wouldn't O at all. However, Yesterday I felt like I was going to explode.

I managed to resist and had a beer so that I could pass out and sleep.

I confessed to my good friend who I've known for years and I told him that I was/am a porn addict, he said that he was shocked that It was that bad. It felt good admitting it to him and we just laughed about it.

He asked me If P ever got in the way of any of my relationships, and I told him that it did, I also told him about YBOP and how it has helped me to get this far.

that is all for today.



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Day 19

Went out drinking again, at least this time I drank Corona, which is not that strong so I did not get too drunk/reckless or anything.
When I came back, I had the urge to PMO, and I remembered all the triumphs that I read on this forum, and how even on the 600th day, I'll always be at risk of relapsing, and I told myself that the urge will go away as long as I don't entertain it.

I watched "The Wire" and there were some sex scenes that came up, went on to Twitter, and some posts had porno on there. However, I kept on telling myself that these triggers shouldn't affect me that much because if I let them, I will always be triggered because we are surrounded by sex, whether it be on social networks, adverts, pop-up ads, series, movies, etc, we are surrounded by sex and these are just challenges that will make my will power to resist even stronger.

I woke up with hectic morning wood, so I walked around a bit and told myself that it was natural.

To anyone that is reading this, If I can do it, so can you, just reframe your mind, tell that inner voice that what if it's wrong, convince that inner voice that there's more to life than just PMO, and never stop reading.



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Day 20

Only ten days to go to complete no nut November. No P, No M, No O.
Still going strong.

I feel so good, I have so much less anxiety when I'm out in public,
I still have some but not that much.



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Day 21

I went out drinking again last night (World cup opening game), came back home at around 5 AM, thought that I'd be able to wake up in time before work (8 AM), and ended up waking up at 10 AM....

Panicked, checked my phone...
No messages?!?!?!

Sent my superiors a message that I couldn't make it to work.

Turns out that we will have online classes this week. lol.

anyway, still have no desire to masturbate or to watch porn, still going strong.


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Day 22 (No PMO)
Day 1 (No AC)

Still going strong, yesterday was tough, really had to fight myself from masturbating.
From today, I've also decided to stop drinking alcohol ( A ) and smoking cigarettes ( C ).


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Day 23 (No PMO)
Day 2 (No AC)

I had hectic blue balls yesterday, It was really really uncomfortable. A strange thing happened in the morning though, I thought I was genuinely having a wet dream/sex, but something was amiss, turns out that I was giving myself a handjob in my sleep, luckily I caught myself just in time and didn't reach climax, this has never happened before.

Last night I was invited to drink, but I declined and said I was busy, and this morning, I threw away all the cigarettes that I had at my place.

This NNN challenge has made me want to be better, I deserve better, enough of this unhealthy unfulfilled potential. enough of self-destructive habits.

cheers for now.


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Day 24 (No PMO)
Day 3 (No AC)

The major issue I had yesterday was feeling like I'm going to burst, and I would use this as an excuse to masturbate before I started the NNN challenge for a very long long long time.

One thing I've realised is that the more I read material that is against masturbation, the weaker the urge to masturbate becomes.

Oh, and my lungs are starting to feel great now that I stopped smoking, I don't know how many times I've tried quitting cigarettes, but the success in the NNN challenge has given me the confidence to try again.


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Day 25 (No PMO)
Day 4 (No Alky, No Ciggies)

I've been thinking, what if this feeling of my balls being full is actually normal?
I mean, for the past ten years I've been emptying out the tank constantly, and maybe my body is trying to adjust.
Another thing, why is my brain so obsessed with sex? Maybe it's cause I've been feeding it sexual material every day for the past ten years?

It's high time I started thinking about other things like making my dreams come true, and getting into shape.

Anyway, started coughing out some phlegm, not a lot but I think my lungs are cleaning themselves from all that smoke.
Have to admit though, I craved a smoke a few times during the day but did not yield.
Today I want to stay away from something else as well.

No more takeaways.

This one is going to be hard because I stay alone and I've never been into cooking.
Let's see how the day goes before I start the counter on No more takeaways.