A Poll For the Older Guys here


Active Member
Admin - I hope this post is ok, if not, please take it down.

My husband has mentioned on a few occasions that the is a bit concerned that maybe he thinks about sex too much, "especially for his age". I found a study of college students on the topic here: https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a28483383/how-often-think-about-sex/ I can say he does think about it significantly more frequently than these college students (according to his own calculations).

I am curious of the older men, on average how many times per day/hour do you have a thought about sex? (It can range from a fleeting thought to a longer, more in-depth thought)

Thanks for you input
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Well-Known Member
I don’t know how you’re going to control this survey. What’s a fleeting thought? Is a quick look at my wife’s boobs a fleeting thought? I will say it is. So I will weigh in to kick it off.

Including fleeting thoughts I would say I think about it at least once every waking hour. I am 60 by the way (and I’m from the UK if that makes any difference).


Well-Known Member
Hmmm….good question. Difficult to say by how much but definitely less over time. That begs the question how much in my 20s, 30s etc. Impossible to say, but I’d guess my sex addiction style life means I was/am above average.


Active Member
I've always thought about sex a lot... I'd say several times an hour. I don't think it's really changed that much over the years, though I did probably get more spontaneous boners when I was younger. I am 45 now.

I do also think about sex in a way every time I see a woman for the first time. This is a big sad but I always have this almost unconscious evaluation happening as to whether a woman I see is someone I'd have sex with. I remember women by their asses... yeah... that's where I look. And then at their faces - having a cute face is absolutely key... I'm only saying this in the context of how my brain works when I see a new woman. That's the evaluation... If the face doesn't attract me then I lose my interest.

Porn definitely makes it worse. When I was using it, I was often anticipating my next session, remembering something I'd seen, and of course actually engaging in hunting for material... at all those times I was thinking about sex. I'd say without porn use it's become less a constant obsession but still a constant in my life. I am also very consciously trying now not to ogle anymore - I still notice a beautiful woman but I hope I am not creepy anymore and that also means letting the brain move on from imagining sex so much...

How is it for women @Sammyjo?


Active Member
I'm sure, just as it is for men, different for everyone. For me, 56 and post menopause, in general not much. That said, with all the P rehab stuff going on it's on my mind quite a bit but not in a positive way most of the time. Take the P stuff out of the equation and I would guess a few times a week.


Active Member
Tough for me to respond, Sammyjo, since the porn addiction has warped my mind when it comes to my sexuality. I would say 90% of the time when I "think about sex" what's really happening is depression, which manifests itself in sexual (ie: addictive) thoughts. In the same way an alcoholic craves a drink, I would crave PMO. In other words, any sexy thoughts I was having weren't really about sex.

As an older guy (53), when I think about women these days, it's generally more of a romantic feeling than purely sexual, although sexy thoughts are certainly there sometimes. Don't know if that helps, but thought I would share.


Respected Member
I would say, always (I just turned 40). However, it is much better (or much more controllable) now when not looking at porn. It's more of a background noise than right up in your face screaming at you. I always tell my Lady that in someway my sex drive is even more strong than it was before, however, I feel more in control of it, and it's not the raging out of control fire it once was. Nevertheless, I still notice every women around me, from my beautiful sixty something year old professor, to all the younger twenty year old's in my classes. This party never ends I guess, it just becomes more sober lol.

As an older guy (53), when I think about women these days, it's generally more of a romantic feeling than purely sexual, although sexy thoughts are certainly there sometimes.
Totally agree. I notice their beauty, and that's sexual, but my attraction for them is considerably deeper than just the surface level, thus, I feel human again.