Let's call it "the final thread"

[new reality]

I'm doing something different for the next few days ("in real life"), so I might not be posting much for a short while.

Still clean, despite a couple of temptations yesterday evening. One of them was just one of those things, but the other two were like those "hangovers" we sometimes get with this type of addiction, things along the lines of autofill suggestions of things we might have searched for and so on.

Definitely don't have a huge amount of time to type much right now, but I intend to stay clean and to focus on healthier things instead. Fortunately, most things are healthier really lol

 

[new reality]

Reset.

 

[new reality]

Reset. The internet can have a bad effect on us, can't it..

 

[new reality]

Was going to start a new thread, but this "the final thread" lol.

New beginnings...

 

[new reality]

Some chat room usage but no M or O. Still counts as a form of edging. I'm sure I've said it before but I've got to avoid two sites in particular, 100 per cent.

 

[new reality]

Reset last night.

Today I had one last peek at those two sites. Now I plan to stay away from them for at least a hundred days! So 14th May then.

 

[new reality]

Checking in. I've been very busy. Was a little stressed about a couple of things. One of them is now resolved, hopefully. The other thing is ongoing but I have an idea or two about what to do. I guess lol. It might not necessarily work out.

 

[new reality]

Let's call it a reset. I thought things were going well in general, then something annoying happened this morning. Oh well, back to it.

 

[new reality]

Did a good streak of about 19 days or so but unfortunately reset due to chat (which I must completely avoid forever!).

Back to it.

 

[Androg]

Good to know your triggers!

 

[new reality]

Thanks for the support. Minor slip today but back to it.

 

[new reality]

Kind of forgot about this site recently, believe it or not! But then again ten days isn't that long. I've been busy, not particularly sociable, and interested in other things. Oh yeah and quite tired at times.

There was a reset a week ago but it was something of an anomaly. I managed to install a couple of blockers on my phone afterwards (I thought my particular phone was immune to them or something).

 

[new reality]

I had a reset today, more about that soon. Main thing is to get straight back on track.

It's not all doom and gloom anyway, some things are good too lol.

 

[new reality]

I had a reset today, more about that soon. Main thing is to get straight back on track.

It's not all doom and gloom anyway, some things are good too lol.

Guess I forgot that I said "more soon".

I'm doing reasonably okay most of the time. One quick reset this weekend and some ill-considered dating site usage last weekend, along with a couple of resets.

 

[new reality]

*cough* And another reset today. At least I also got a lot of cleaning and tidying done too.

Maybe I'll try and post every day but talk about things I'm replacing the addiction with.. hobbies and things like that. Maybe philosophy stuff too. I kind of did this once or twice before, but I'll try it again.

 

[new reality]

Kind of forgot to post yesterday, but I have been thinking about what I said in the last message, and doing a few bits and pieces. Let's dive in and talk about some stuff without thinking too much.

Language learning: currently I'm most interested in Latin and Ancient Greek. In practice, at the moment, this usually involves reading textbooks / grammar books on my e-reader, mostly while in bed. Hey, if you were looking for ideas for something reboot-friendly that you can do in bed.. lol. I did also half-watch an educational video about Ancient Greek yesterday, but it was below my level. What other languages am I interested in? Pretty much every single one, but there's only so much time.

Programming: thinking about it.

Electronics: had an idea which I'll try and implement soon.

A project which I'll call "the operation": did a fair bit of work towards it today. Tomorrow I'm hoping to do something of a reconnaissance mission to do with it.

 

[new reality]

To continue the theme of just writing and not thinking too much..

What if the best approach was to try to avoid talking about the addiction, and instead talk about things we're interested in, a bit like I did in the previous message? Of course, sometimes we feel like talking about the addiction. But perhaps this should be kept to a minimum, to avoid triggering ourselves and reminding ourselves about the addiction. Is it possible to "avoid and move on"?

Language learning: did some more, but again mainly in bed.

Programming: I was wrong in the last message, I did actually did do a bit yesterday, and did another little bit today. I often forget "good" things that I did.

Electronics: Not really, just thoughts.

The operation: Something came up which prevented me from doing what I intended, but I still did a mini-reconnaissance mission instead. This operation and some other stuff in my life have me a little on edge at times.

Okay I'll leave it there I think.

 

[new reality]

Okay, so yesterday was something of a blur. I do have to report a reset, but that was largely due to experiencing inner turmoil relating to the operation. On top of stress coming from the operation, I've also been experiencing some interpersonal stress. While I obviously want to stay clean and not have resets, I've decided that if a reset happens while I'm in some turmoil relating to the operation, I'm going to forgive myself and move on much more quickly than I would otherwise tend to. In the past I've sometimes treated recovery as if it's more important than certain things like the operation, but I think the time has come to change my priorities somewhat, for the time-being anyway. Recovery remains very important of course!

Language learning: did some in bed, but less than usual thanks to yesterday's events

Programming: did some and got some results, but more debugging is needed

Electronics: again, nothing much

The operation: as I mentioned above

 

[new reality]

I had a busy weekend which was a little stressful at times, enjoyable at other times. Also my mindset was still not right due to being off-balance by the operation and stuff.

No excuses, but I did reset last night, which left me feeling pretty stupid/bad afterwards. Oh well, today's a new day. Another rebooter was saying that he has to do everything differently now. Maybe it's hard to do absolutely everything differently, but we should definitely do certain things very differently! I have to interrupt old habits and do new, different things instead.

 

[new reality]

Don't be sad Androg! As long as we're trying is the main thing.