A fresh start for a mountain goat ⛰️

[TypeN]

That's great man. Like you say, I think it's a solid sign of healing that you are experiencing these dreams.

And about sex, that seems like a very healthy mindset. I think as guys we’re expected to be “always on”, but we deserve as much as anyone to set healthy boundaries like you’re describing. If it’s not right for you right now that’s fine, and if this partner is worth your time, I am sure they will understand.

Congrats on more than 3 weeks clean!

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 26

Quick update in the train back from the big city. Some urges right now, probably natural horniness to start with, combined with too much time on my phone in the train. Almost started diverging to porn related content but then thought “why?” “What will it bring me?” And I stopped. Probably linked to boredom too. And perhaps some over-excitement about all the plans ahead in my life (all exciting but also quite stressful, because many are just at an early stage of prep yet they’re not so long from now). I might be a bit stressed by all the unknowns (incl. financially).

Once I’m home, I need to sit down, relax and plan carefully (1) the things that are just ahead (7 coming days) and (2) the medium term plans (many things to come, both work and outside of work related, in the next 2-3 months causing my brain to fart a little!) I need to both address (when possible) and accept the unknowns ahead.

 

[TypeN]

Day 26

Quick update in the train back from the big city. Some urges right now, probably natural horniness to start with, combined with too much time on my phone in the train. Almost started diverging to porn related content but then thought “why?” “What will it bring me?” And I stopped. Probably linked to boredom too. And perhaps some over-excitement about all the plans ahead in my life (all exciting but also quite stressful, because many are just at an early stage of prep yet they’re not so long from now). I might be a bit stressed by all the unknowns (incl. financially).

Once I’m home, I need to sit down, relax and plan carefully (1) the things that are just ahead (7 coming days) and (2) the medium term plans (many things to come, both work and outside of work related, in the next 2-3 months causing my brain to fart a little!) I need to both address (when possible) and accept the unknowns ahead.

Good on you for intervening in that thought process man. I think part of what makes that kind of situation difficult is that we're very used to associating a wild range of emotions with our addiction ... boredom, excitement, over and under stimulation. It will take us time to separate those basic emotions from PMO but it's good that you caught it and good that you have a plan for when you get home!

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 29
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

Happily getting closer to the 30 days mark!

I'm feeling really good. Although I didn't post as much here as I should have. Got back home from the big city. Completed some work and also enjoyed the outdoors, with two great backcountry skiing days, for which I'm beyond grateful. Good snow, good friends, good sensations. Learning to take care of the little minor injuries I have, with my physiotherapist's advice.

Planning a big month-long trip to America in March, for which I'm really excited. Again, having things to look forward to helps me a lot. The risk is that I don't enjoy the present as much being focused on the future, but I also feel like I'm making an effort in that space as well.

Grateful for a new challenge I've just started: gluten free diet. Just want to explore new ways of cooking and seeing if it has an impact on my level of inflammation (joints) and overall well-being!

Sex wise: a few urges but nothing I can't control or recognise from a distance (that's key after all, recognise a trigger just as it happens to be able to say 'no thank you').

Generally feeling strong. Sleeping a lot. Confident about the reboot process.

 

[TypeN]

Awesome my friend. You've come to a big milestone here. Very happy for you.

Let us know how the gluten free cooking goes!

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 31
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

It's been A MONTH! Hallelujah. I'm truly celebrating because this hasn't happened in a long time. Like, many many months. This forum and the few I'm in touch with have helped a lot. I have gained a lot of clarity by trying to put down my thoughts as often as I can here. Thank you!

Good weekend. Although did hurt myself a little while skiing, I know it will be better in a couple of days. Accepting it and doing other things instead. Injuries are an opportunity to do other, more personal things like reading, as I've come to accept in the last month. Got back to running too. I signed up for a trail run race in the summer, it helps a lot to have an objective in mind (I'm 'training' for a reason).

In this past month PMO-free, I've put my sexuality to the side entirely. I have sort of removed it completely from what I see in my world about me. Which has helped a lot staying away from porn. I'm trying to think, as the next few weeks unfold, how I can bring it back, or at least how to build a sex-positive image of myself. I don't want this to lead to a relapse. I believe that for now, at least for the next 2-4 weeks, I want to stay away from O as well. I like the energy I have without Os in my life. Yet I'll want, eventually, to reconnect with that side of me once I'm confident it might not lead to watching P. I'll think about it in the coming weeks and see how I might find a balanced solution/ way forward to re-inject some healthy sexuality in my life. One argument may be that I'll wait for sex with a partner.

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 32
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

Doing well. Slow beginning of the week. I've got tasks for work, and in between, nice activities that will make me feel good: yoga, swimming, climbing, running, dinner & movies with friends and a jazz festival!

A month in and I'm trying to see how to re-introduce sexuality in my life after a month of saying NO to it in all its forms. I am aware of the risk of a relapse. I thus decided with myself that I would take this week to think it through before doing anything. I have an appointment with my therapist by the end of the week where I'll explore the options I'm considering.

What will follow might be triggering and/or might introduce ideas to some who don't need them at the moment The first thing I'm thinking about is buying an 'erotic' book with short stories, not the P-like kind but the soft, positive, and nice kind of stories. I realise I need these positive images of what sex can be, especially after viewing a lot of insanely crazy P before my reboot. I need to feel aroused, and show my brain that these little, normal, loving and sensual situations are arousing. Of course, if I'm to do this, I need to set up some rules. What Iike about buying a book, is that it's a little bit old school, it will be contained within this book (not like internet where you get an endless quantity of more and more intense content). Then, I would need to set up an acceptable rythme, like once every 10-14 days (TBD) and I should limit myself to one story. The idea for me is to keep rewiring my brain to what I would like to be aroused to.

To sum it up, my thinking so far (no decision until the end of the week):

• Buy a book of soft erotic short stories to help me wire my brain in the right direction/ re-introduce positive sexuality in my life
• Set up an acceptable schedule (every 10-14 days?)
• Limit myself to one story
• During this 'trial', be present on this forum to report how I'm feeling every day - to encourage myself to be as conscious as possible of what it does to me etc. and to avoid a potential relapse!

I'll keep the thinking going. No decision until the end of the week!

 

[TypeN]

Good luck man! I don't know that I could manage something like that right now, with how much I struggle with fantasies. But each of us is an individual and you’re in a different place. It’s good that you’ve articulated a rationale and a plan. I think one of the most important bits you’ve identified is the need for a schedule, which will help keep this activity what you're planning it to be: just an occasional chance to reconnect with yourself.

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 33
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

Good, productive work day. Grateful for a lovely work environment, colleagues that I enjoy being around with. Excited for projects/challenges to come.

I'm still thinking about my idea above (fixed schedule of MO to soft erotic stories to re-ignite positive sex imagery/desire in my life). Tonight, my brain is going in many directions about it (I said I wouldn't make a decision right away about it):

• A part of me really wants it... I know it can have positive effects on my brain and give it a sense of what is desirable. I know a book of short stories that is non vulgar, positive, well written (plus, it would be contained within a book, wouldn't involve screens or the possibility go look for more hardcore stuff). But perhaps it's too early in my reboot? Too risky?
• The other part of me finds it risky indeed. It could lead my brain to want more, and maybe to a relapse.

Hmm. This is tough. For sure I need a strong plan with it. Will discuss with therapist on Thursday.

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 34
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

Good night of sleep. Grateful for all the time I manage to create for me to sleep.

Now, continuing on my reflection from the last two days, I'm wondering: should I first try MO without any stimulus (rather than going for an erotic book)? That's a legitimate question for me. Not an easy one. I like the perspective of the 'contained' and 'healthy' erotica book, it just then becomes a matter of willpower to make sure I don't go beyond that book. I feel like a physical book will symbolically help me contain it (and is nicely old school in a way).

Today: going to the pool, work and rock climbing in the evening

 

[TypeN]

Day 34
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

Good night of sleep. Grateful for all the time I manage to create for me to sleep.

Now, continuing on my reflection from the last two days, I'm wondering: should I first try MO without any stimulus (rather than going for an erotic book)? That's a legitimate question for me. Not an easy one. I like the perspective of the 'contained' and 'healthy' erotica book, it just then becomes a matter of willpower to make sure I don't go beyond that book. I feel like a physical book will symbolically help me contain it (and is nicely old school in a way).

Today: going to the pool, work and rock climbing in the evening

That's an interesting question man! You're probably the best judge of yourself and how these things are likely to affect you, but just looking at the situation personally, I think that MO without any stimulus may be the more "neutral" of the two options. In one case you're just MO'ing, and in the other you're MO'ing, but with an added stimulus. The question about these erotic stories is, will they or won't they stimulate you in the same way as porn? (i.e., leave you feeling unsatisfied/wanting more after MO'ing to them, which could be a slippery slope). You would probably know best whether or not this kind of thing affects you that way.

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 39
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

Hello everyone! I've been busy but very good overall. I should have given myself a little more time for writing here.

Many little things to report about my reboot.

First... @TypeN, THANK YOU for your simple and yet very powerful question "Why don't you try to have real sex instead of using book erotica?" - at first I was a bit like "ehmmm- well it's not something you can easily make happen, especially here in a smaller town". But then, it got me to think about how the fear of ED keeps me away from even initiating situations that could lead to sex. So, I decided to start facing this fear. I went on Tinder, and matched with a nice girl. We met in real life for a drink and then at a music festival this weekend and it was super nice. No sex yet, I think I need some time to feel comfortable with someone. Plus, I like her and would like to see where this might go. So, again, THANK YOU!

Other things...

• Following the conversation about reintroducing MO in my life after 30 days, I tried M without even O, and that was a really nice experience! Focused on sensations etc. Didn't want to O just to keep that energy in me. Super nice, satisfying, and a self-centering activity
• I had a wet dream the night after - I realised it was (a) because it had been 2 weeks+ since the last O, and (b) because I M'ed the day before. Made me realise, if I do this again, I might as well O and enjoy it rather than having a wet dream.

Thus got me to think about a framework for MO... That would be OK:

• Occasionally - i.e. not more than once every 10 days
• If no real sex at the moment...
• If it's not to answer a triggering situation (e.g. bored, sad, frustrated - there are other things to help me address these things!)

Very excited for what's ahead with that lady. And other things: traveling for 6 weeks to North America in March, more skiing here until then, lots of friends visiting me... My life ahead is PACKED! Grateful for that.

 

[Galatians51]

Thus got me to think about a framework for MO... That would be OK:

• Occasionally - i.e. not more than once every 10 days
• If no real sex at the moment...
• If it's not to answer a triggering situation (e.g. bored, sad, frustrated - there are other things to help me address these things!)

hey just a thought here... I've read a lot of journals on the forum and I tend to notice that guys that MO without P or more likely to slip up and have a complete relapse. This was also the case for myself personally, anytime I MO'd it would often lead to the desire of PMO. I'm not saying that will be you, I see other journals where guys say they don't have a problem with this... just something to consider before you to decide to go wacking away, lol

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Thank you Galatians51! You're right. MO is risky. Yet for me, I want to be able, eventually, to do it in a healthy way. I believe I can. I don't want to have this "shame" surrounding MO. I want to be able to see my sexuality as something positive, and that includes sexuality with myself too. It's something I've been giving a lot of thoughts to. In any case, with that present system, I'm not set to MO for at least the next week or so (since I had wet dream a few days ago, and I don't want to O more than once every 10-14 days). Also, since I'm seeing someone with whom sex may eventually happen soon, MO on my own isn't something I'm currently thinking of, because I'm keen to save that energy for her. I know the risks of MO on my own, I've experienced them many times. And I think the answer is in TypeN's question: why not real sex? Yes, I'll try. And hopefully that's what will happen.

If not, MO on my own is also something I'd like to be able to happily and healthily. I just want to do it while being mindful of the risks and thus, being mindful of how my brain and body react in the days following MO. This actually is the same if I'm to have real sex, there is the risk that my brain and body want more the day(s) after! So real sex or healthy MO on my own both require my mindfulness of the risks that will follow, and a way to stay out of the chaser effect (the 'spike in libido that follows orgasm')! Thoughts?

 

[TypeN]

Day 39
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

Hello everyone! I've been busy but very good overall. I should have given myself a little more time for writing here.

Many little things to report about my reboot.

First... @TypeN, THANK YOU for your simple and yet very powerful question "Why don't you try to have real sex instead of using book erotica?" - at first I was a bit like "ehmmm- well it's not something you can easily make happen, especially here in a smaller town". But then, it got me to think about how the fear of ED keeps me away from even initiating situations that could lead to sex. So, I decided to start facing this fear. I went on Tinder, and matched with a nice girl. We met in real life for a drink and then at a music festival this weekend and it was super nice. No sex yet, I think I need some time to feel comfortable with someone. Plus, I like her and would like to see where this might go. So, again, THANK YOU!

Other things...

• Following the conversation about reintroducing MO in my life after 30 days, I tried M without even O, and that was a really nice experience! Focused on sensations etc. Didn't want to O just to keep that energy in me. Super nice, satisfying, and a self-centering activity
• I had a wet dream the night after - I realised it was (a) because it had been 2 weeks+ since the last O, and (b) because I M'ed the day before. Made me realise, if I do this again, I might as well O and enjoy it rather than having a wet dream.

Thus got me to think about a framework for MO... That would be OK:

• Occasionally - i.e. not more than once every 10 days
• If no real sex at the moment...
• If it's not to answer a triggering situation (e.g. bored, sad, frustrated - there are other things to help me address these things!)

Very excited for what's ahead with that lady. And other things: traveling for 6 weeks to North America in March, more skiing here until then, lots of friends visiting me... My life ahead is PACKED! Grateful for that.

Awesome man -- I'm glad that question helped you put things in perspective. It takes strength to face uncomfortable feelings like that so good on you.

Anyway, stoked for you about this connection you're making with the girl! I'll look forward to hearing how things go.

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 44
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

I've been quite busy still. In a good way. Friend visiting me so we're doing loads of stuff in the mountains... Skiing and rock climbing outdoors (blessed by beautiful weather).

Things have developed nicely where the girl I met last week, and I think we can say that we've started dating. It feels lovely. First time we were together for a night I wasn't so comfortable with sex, it was hard to get hard because I wasn't truly 'letting go' and 'enjoying the moment' (linked with performance anxiety). And then, the second night we spent together was great... It had been a while for me (sex with someone, I mean), so I'm celebrating. I like that I'm feeling safe with her. I know it's OK if I don't feel like sex one day, I can just say it and she'll be OK with it (normal, you would say). It's also helpful to be with someone who has a higher level of libido, it's sort of gently pushing me in the right direction (vs. I have previously been with people with low libido too, and so, that wasn't easy!). We have a cool connection. This has given me quite some self confidence.

Things to look forward to... next week I'm going to (another) big city with the woman I'm dating to see an opera and spend a day there; friends visiting for the weekend; more skiing...

Things to watch out for... Monday I have not much planned. I may need to think of what to do and not risk spending the day 'alone with nothing pre-thought of' - I could perhaps go running, and then chill at the coffee shop to read a book...? I may also spend some time preparing some things for work at my coworking space (perhaps I work in the morning, and then, go outside in the afternoon).

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 45
▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

Very tired from the last five days of both demanding outdoor activities (to keep my friend who is visiting busy, hehe) and a blooming love story. It's all very positive but at the end of the day today I sensed that I had to take a little break. Me time is needed. And sleep. And rest!

My friend left tonight, so that's good in that sense.

Tomorrow (Monday) will be a 'free' day. Very little planned. I might need to think of the things I might do to fill in this day in a fulfilling way... and allow me to relax, recenter myself and rest...

• A little bit of work in the morning
• Meditation
• Yoga / stretching / physio exercises
• Hanging out with my housemate who is off in the morning
• Swimming in the late afternoon
• Reading my book (fiction or non fiction)
• Calling a friend about climbing trip
• Cleaning my car

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Day 46 - no P

---

November ▇
December ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇
Januarywr ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

▇ no PMO ▇ PMO ▇ healthy MO

---

Following my ideas from yesterday about how to decompress nicely after 5 intense days. Feeling chill today. Doing things slowly and enjoy a mellow Monday.

What I did so far today...

• Meditation
• Work
• Cleaning car + groceries
• Hanging out with housemate

What I will do this afternoon...

• Little e-bike ride to catch the sunlight
• Physio exercise + stretching
• Calling a friend
• Read book
• Tea with a friend
• Meditation before bed

One thought about my difficulties with real sex. Now, it's mostly in my mind: fear of performance and a difficulty in being in the present moment. If I think about it too much, if I anticipate that I will find it difficult to 'let go' during sex (and thus struggle with getting hard), it won't work. I need to find good ways of relaxing and avoid anticipation. The nice sex I had a couple days ago was a bit unexpected (at that moment) and thus helped me not anticipate and helped me be in the moment. Mediation might help. Slowly I will build my confidence back.

 

[TypeN]

Day 46 - no P

---

November ▇
December ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇
Januarywr ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ← I'm here!

▇ no PMO ▇ PMO ▇ healthy MO ▇ real, happy sex

---

Following my ideas from yesterday about how to decompress nicely after 5 intense days. Feeling chill today. Doing things slowly and enjoy a mellow Monday.

What I did so far today...

• Meditation
• Work
• Cleaning car + groceries
• Hanging out with housemate

What I will do this afternoon...

• Little e-bike ride to catch the sunlight
• Physio exercise + stretching
• Calling a friend
• Read book
• Tea with a friend
• Meditation before bed

One thought about my difficulties with real sex. Now, it's mostly in my mind: fear of performance and a difficulty in being in the present moment. If I think about it too much, if I anticipate that I will find it difficult to 'let go' during sex (and thus struggle with getting hard), it won't work. I need to find good ways of relaxing and avoid anticipation. The nice sex I had a couple days ago was a bit unexpected (at that moment) and thus helped me not anticipate and helped me be in the moment. Mediation might help. Slowly I will build my confidence back.

Excellent man. So pleased for you to see how much progress you've made, and that you've carried the strategies you devised early on with you into the present (planning your quiet days, and so on).

Regarding sex, I think that is a good approach. And perhaps you can remind yourself (maybe you already do) that it's fine if you don't feel up to it when you expect that you would have. We all have human bodies and they don't always work with us when we might want them to, but that's totally normal. Perhaps sometimes it's just a sign sometimes that your body needs something else in that moment. And given what you've said about this girl I bet you can have a nice time with her either way!

 

[the_mountain_goat]

Absolutely TypeN. Actually, the guided meditation session I did last night was about accepting things as they are, including your body: it’s ok if your body doesn’t feel like sleeping yet for instance, accept it and perhaps the stress of not falling asleep will vanish quicker. Accepting vs. Giving up isn’t the same thing. I liked that idea!