At what point do you start dating?

[theway1002]

I've struggled with PIED most of my young adult life.

My goal is to one day become cured and to have a healthy relationship.
I've put off pursuing girls until I become fully cured. However, I keep relapsing and so that day may never come, or might be a very long time away.

A big reason I keep relapsing is because of loneliness and boredom.

I'm wondering if I should start pursuing a relationship now before I'm "fully" cured. Perhaps a relationship could help me recover by allowing my to rewire with a real person and just overall increase my happiness which would help me avoid porn.

On the other hand, I'm scared it would be unfair to the girl if I pursue a relationship even though I have these issues with PIED. I'm afraid I won't be able to perform and it will lead to embarrassment and heartbreak...

I don't know, I just feel like I need to start trying something new...

 

[PornAddict]

I'm actually enduring the same thing. I want to start dating but I've been putting it off so i can fully heal from my PIED. The problem is that i keep relapsing. Perhaps if we start dating and let our partner know what we are going thru might help? Being that vulnerable is already gonna be a huge challenge for me. And i trust that the girl that's really down for you will stick around if and when she sees how determined you are to change.

 

[addict_but_I_hope]

I am in the same position.

I started chatting with a girl and we were talking about meeting so I "decided" to quit (I have tried many times in the past to quit but I always relapsed). We met eventually and it became a bit physical what together with a bit of stress the next day at work made me relapse again

I am also worried that I will not perform when the time comes. So I will try to postpone it a bit.

But to be honest I think that getting in contact with a person should help with the whole rebooting.

The problem with a new date compared to a long relationship is that you cannot expect the other person not to want to get physical often... This is what worries me the most in the present case. That I will not perform, will have missed the chance with this girl and that I will never have my life back.

 

[Naruto]

You should start dating without regards to whether you are fully healed or not, whether you can perform or not. I have been in the same boat and I did the same thing (kept postponing the dating phase till I get cured). You will lose many months / years of your life like this.

You don't go on dates mostly for the reason of fear of losing the girl and risking shame/failure or bruising your ego by failing to deliver in bed when the time. Guess what - if you don't go on the date, you will lose the girl anyways. Girls won't stick around waiting for you till you heal. There are 100s of guys out there asking them out constantly on socials/dating apps etc. So you basically have nothing to lose, only to gain by going on dates. What you are really afraid of is the pain of failure/rejection. Besides, most girls don't really orgasm from vaginal intercourse. Buy a magic wand (from amazon) and give them great orals to get them to climax multiple times.