I am taking control of myself

Jochen999

Jochen999

Member
Hello everyone

I would like to introduce myself. I am 29 years old. I had my first sexual experiences with adult magazines and later with pornography consumption on my mobile phone and laptop. I have used pornography consumption since my youth as a coping mechanism for negative emotions, among other things. About 2 years ago I became aware of the possible negative influence of pornography. Since then I have tried to consume less. My longest period of abstinence was 22 days. I noticed things about myself during this time that motivated me to continue and beat the pornography addiction. I have found that pornography always wants to pull me back in its orbit and I hope to get and give helpful tips here and meet people who are on the same path as me. I am grateful to have found this forum and hope that this will be the beginning of a wonderful journey. My goal is to stay abstinent for 90 days and document my journey here.
 
Jochen999

Jochen999

Member
DAY 3

The first days went well. I have no cravings. This may also be because I'm sick at the moment and spend most of my time in bed.
 
Law

Law

Member
Welcome @Jochen999 !
I would say that being bedridden for a few days is actually quite dangerous, as boredom and idleness are one of my triggers to fall back into PMO. But I am glad if this is not the case for you 😁

I wish all the best in this adventure we are all sharing at this point.

Although I have not offically started a journal yet, I am still quitting porn too, so I might write one in the near future. I will read your updates here, and put my faith in you, if that counts as a accountability partner!

Do you plan on quitting "just" porn? or masturbation too?
 
Jochen999

Jochen999

Member
Law said:
Welcome @Jochen999 !
I would say that being bedridden for a few days is actually quite dangerous, as boredom and idleness are one of my triggers to fall back into PMO. But I am glad if this is not the case for you 😁

I wish all the best in this adventure we are all sharing at this point.

Although I have not offically started a journal yet, I am still quitting porn too, so I might write one in the near future. I will read your updates here, and put my faith in you, if that counts as a accountability partner!

Do you plan on quitting "just" porn? or masturbation too?
Click to expand...
Boredom is also one of my triggers and I always consume porn in bed, so it is currently unfavorable. However, I and my body are busy recovering right now, so I guess that's why I'm not thinking about PMO.

Thanks for your support :) I wish you every success on your way to quit porn.

For me, the journal is helpful for writing down my thoughts and experiences and for documenting developments.

For me, porn and masturbation are closely linked. I would like to give up both in the long run.
 
Jochen999

Jochen999

Member
DAY 5

Hello i wish you a happy new year!!!

5 days without PMO. In fact, I am surprised that I hardly gave a thought to PMO. I'm feeling a bit better now.

Since I will have to deal with the desire for PMO again at some point, I want to be prepared.

I am still not sure how to handle my mobile phone, laptop. I have been toying with the idea of locking them away if the cravings get too much. The devices are part of my everyday life and I want to be able to use them without hesitation in the long term. I already use blockers, but I know how to get around them.

Do you have any advice for me? How do you deal with it?
 
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Jochen999

Jochen999

Member
DAY 7

I am getting better day by day. Although I've been at home most of the time for days because of Corona, I'm not falling into old habits, playing with myself or watching porn. I am looking forward to the next few days.
 
C

Clouds&Dirt

Active Member
7 days, nice job! I use CovenantEyes for the computer and BlockerHero for the phone. Both of them have some sort of "anti-disabling" features so you can't turn them off
 
Jochen999

Jochen999

Member
Thank you for your recommendations Optimize55 and Clouds&Dirt

Day 9

Now that I'm fit again, the desire to watch porn came back at the same time. When I set up my mobile phone/laptop/tablet with blockers today. I couldn't resist the temptation to test them. But I got stuck with ***pictures for too long. However, I was able to prevent the worst. Now I have everything set up and my focus is back where it should be. Now, after all those days in bed, it's time to fill the calendar again and spend more time outside.
I think I notice that I have more clarity in my head than 9 days ago. Let's see what the next few days bring.
I have also found an accountability partner, which motivates me and definitely feels good.
 
Jochen999

Jochen999

Member
Day 10

A first small milestone. Currently, the craving is at a 7/10. I have to be careful. I spent a lot of time outside today, which helped a lot. I will also try to keep the time I spend alone at home low over the next few days.
 
B

Banouj7

Member
Jochen999 said:
Day 10

A first small milestone. Currently, the craving is at a 7/10. I have to be careful. I spent a lot of time outside today, which helped a lot. I will also try to keep the time I spend alone at home low over the next few days.
Click to expand...
Good work! You already took a big step.
 
Jochen999

Jochen999

Member
Day 11

Last night I downloaded a dating app and swiped endlessly. Fortunately, I deleted the app again after about 1 hour. Otherwise, the day went well today. I feel quite good at the moment.
 
Jochen999

Jochen999

Member
Day 12 and 13

I am currently on day 13. I feel better and more open and have a greater desire to interact with people and feel less anxiety in social situations.

However, I downloaded a dating app again during the night and used it on autopilot for 1 hour. Now I have deleted it again and installed a blocker on my phone that blocks new apps.

I notice that something changes for the better when I am abstinent, which keeps me motivated. I want my life back!
 
C

cheeseck

Member
Jochen999 said:
Day 12 and 13

I am currently on day 13. I feel better and more open and have a greater desire to interact with people and feel less anxiety in social situations.

However, I downloaded a dating app again during the night and used it on autopilot for 1 hour. Now I have deleted it again and installed a blocker on my phone that blocks new apps.

I notice that something changes for the better when I am abstinent, which keeps me motivated. I want my life back!
Click to expand...
Great job on day 13 man!
 
H

HelloThere

Member
What helped me was setting up as many blockers as I could find. You can still uninstall them, but the more blockers, the more effort you have to put in, and the more time it will give you to think about why you are doing this. Also, going for a walk when urges suddenly strike helps. Give it a try :)

Also, I used dating apps. They were one of the reasons for my previous relapse, so I told myself not dating apps until day 90 and then only on fixed times.

Keep up the good work. You almost got the two weeks mark!
 
C

Clouds&Dirt

Active Member
Good catch to update your blockers! As soon as you find a "loophole" in your blocking, you gotta close it ASAP. Almost at two weeks bro, we got this 💪
 
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