Unbusting my balls

BrassBalls707

BrassBalls707

Active Member
Day 60/60

I'm moving the goalpost to 90 days.

I still find sleep deficit to be the largest contributor to experiencing urges. I intend to further improve upon the existing systems I have to settle for 8 hours of sleep per night. Things like setting alarms and making bedtime routines easier and more pleasant come to mind.

Videogame use often circumvents these systems and feels like the next wrinkle to iron out entirely. In spite of these maluses, I have yet to let go of the reigns so to speak.

I'm still off alcohol, which has been tremendous in rebooting also.

As reward, I'm taking myself on a date this Saturday to enjoy a café and do some reading, in addition to some recreational exercise.

Onwards.
 
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achilles heel

Well-Known Member
Congratulations on your great success!

Just read your introduction and am shocked every time I read how the younger generation gets exposed that early to porn. Your success is even more impressive considering you were already exposed to that poison before being 10 years old.

A few weeks ago I witnessed a mother letting her three year old daughter use her cell phone and she was capable of switching to YouTube and watch random videos there. There’s awareness of drinking, smoking and bad nutrition, but no education on the damage of electronic devices with internet connection and this community here is just the tip of the iceberg of the very few who realize they have a problem and try to change it.

Consider yourself lucky having identified your problem, you can and will overcome this addiction!
 
BrassBalls707

BrassBalls707

Active Member
achilles heel said:
how the younger generation gets exposed that early to porn
Click to expand...
While I understand this is problematic, I don't attribute that to be the cause of the addiction. I am convinced that if it wasn't for porn, it would have been something else like alcohol or delinquent behaviors like vandalizing, stealing, drugs...

For me personally, it was the tragic cocktail of having no emotional processing skills or support, divorcing parents and lack of (internet) supervision, insufficient sex ed at school, distrusting relationship with parents, problems at school, rebellious sister and constantly agitated parents, emotionally unavailable father, inconsistently emotional mother, videogame addiction, addiction sensitivity from undiagnosed adhd, loneliness or rejection in social life, no role models growing up... I could go on but these come to mind just this second.

On top of that, the accessibility of porn and amount has increased. Humans are already primed for it, now this sensitivity is relentlessly exploited. Technology has exacerbated this 'sex sells' concept it has become almost inevitable suffering it in a modern environment.

The fact I could suffer it for so long is because it wasn't obstructing my normal functioning. Then, I could get away with barely sleeping as I learned that my teachers didn't care. Then, I didn't care about death grip or normal sexual tastes because I wasn't getting in any relationship. Then, I didn't care about wasting my time on porn because I cultivated no desires or ambitions to compete with them. Then, I didn't care about my emotions because I was endlessly dulling them with technology use.

Once these were all turned around, somewhere at age 20, I realized I'd suffer less by acting than by leaving the bad habit the same.

achilles heel said:
Consider yourself lucky having identified your problem, you can and will overcome this addiction!
Click to expand...

I realize I am fortunate now that you say it. I believe this problem will get worse before it gets better. I feel like I got ahead of it. Now, I sincerely worry for the folk that follow.

Thank you for reading and being supportive, it allows me to swat away the doubts just a pinch more easily. 🙏
 
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