39 days is an awesome run. While none of us ever want to use again, it’s important to remember that a single slip doesn’t undo your progress. If you get right back up and keep going you aren’t starting from 0.
Certainly not the expert on this since I am still working on permanently leaving this nonsense behind, but your statement about not having a plan struck me because I think the most important thing that’s helped me move to a new stage in my redo very is exactly that. Making a plan. Figure out what happened that led to that. What you were doing or weren’t doing in the moments before, and the day and days leading up to it. How you were feeling leading up to it. What thoughts have been on your mind lately.
The more we can identify what is triggering the slips the more we can change everything around it to not do it again.
Thank you for your thoughts.
Maybe you are right and I don't start from day 0.
I try to figure it out what was leading to this.
Since October before quitting porn I started a healthy diet, did some sports every day. So I was getting in good shape and after surviving the flatline my sex drive started again. I like to show myself and was proud of getting into shape. Then there were about 5 days after sex with my wife and there was no action down there. I wanted to test if everything works and masturbated once. Maybe this was the beginning, I think it's called the chaser effect. Maybe this lead to where I am now. Cam2cam was connecting sort of porn with showing off.
For this time I have to kill that chase effect.
During the days where I failed, I was home alone in the morning with plenty of times and this was an opportunity. I need will power to get through this.