Ready for the fog to lift

[42&Hopeful]

Day 4

Today was a good day! I got a lot of work done and I spent time with family, which, for me, can often be triggering. This time, though, I think choosing to drink less and stay present helped keep me feeling confident and in control.

This week will be a challenge. I am facing a formidably busy work week that will require a lot from me - two big presentations/workshops that I have yet to create and a bunch of other work, plus business planning stuff. I will be spending a few nights in hotels, which presents another challenge. I often PMO on the first night at a hotel. I have this little kid sense of being totally free to do whatever I want when I am traveling alone. I always pay for it the next day, as I rarely get a good night sleep.

I think this is why Mondays are often very difficult for me. On the weekend I can forget about how busy I am and I don't need to think about all that needs to be done the following week. Then, on Monday, it floods over me. I get overwhelmed. Deep down, I don't believe I have the ability to complete the tasks. Then I retreat into a long PMO session. I have done this often on Monday mornings.

I will be strong tomorrow. i will face all that I have to do, picking away at it, piece by piece. Facing the challenge, head on.

I will start the week by exercising, and I will use your advice for finding ways to distract myself.

Until tomorrow, thanks for reading!

 

[Androg]

Stay strong. Your presentations will benefit from the mental clarity and extra energy.

 

[42&Hopeful]

Day 5

Today was a good day. I am in the midst of a squabble with my workmate, but other than that, it's been good. I was home alone for the majority of the day and I was able to distract myself when temptation stuck. I remained focused on the work that needed to be done.

I do feel myself getting stronger. Even though I relapsed five days ago, I feel stronger than a typical five-day break. This feels different. More like real change. I don't want to count my chickens before they're hatched, but, whatever the case, right now I am feeling good. My confidence levels are increasing.

I am, however, about to head into the hotel part of my week and that has always been a challenge. I am also not sure how to resolve my current conflict with my business partner, who is a friend, but we're not seeing eye to eye on something. Usually, I just admit fault and move on, but my increased confidence has me standing my ground a little more, and that is new territory for me. I like it, but it's unfamiliar and I don't yet have a playbook.

I'm grateful to be here, and I will take things one day at a time.

Thanks for reading!

 

[42&Hopeful]

Day 6

Today has been a good day. I was able to distract myself from the push to retreat from work stress into a PMO session. I spent the majority of the day traveling to my destination, where I am now, in a hotel room, about to go to bed without taking my laptop with me.

I am aware that day seven is tomorrow and that this is when I should anticipate the challenges associated with the dopamine slump that arrives about a week after a PMO session. I am hoping that arming myself with this knowledge and doing what I can to brace for it will be enough to see me through.

Thanks for reading and thanks so much for the support!

 

[42&Hopeful]

Day 7

I did it. I finished day seven without retreating to PMO. It was one of the busiest work/travel days I have had in years, and I made it through. I think one of you told me that I would appreciate tackling these challenging situations with the mental clarity that comes with not not succumbing to PMO. I could not agree more. It was still stressful, but it was refreshing to lean into the stress without the added shame and other emotions that trail PMO.

I am thankful for your support! I am grateful for today!

Tomorrow is another busy day, and I am hopeful!

Thanks for reading!

 

[Percival]

7 days is great! PMO is an excellent way to numb the-whatever (pain, work, stress, etc.). I fully sympathize. But as you say, you can handle it better---paradoxically---without it. It's just hard to remember that!

 

[42&Hopeful]

I came home after a very, very exhausting week away and I succumbed. I had nothing left in the tank, in terms of defences. I was and am quite exhausted. I thought I had this. I was feeling great. I am not sure how to handle coping with something as challenging as a day eight while feeling such intense fatigue. Any advice? It was an anomalous week. I won't be so busy for a long time.

Thanks for reading!

 

[Androg]

Fatigue is a trigger for many (like boredom, loneliness, hunger, etc.).

Be ready for your triggers and have a plan for what you will do to shift your attention to something constructive, or at least innocuous. Take a walk? Meditate? Call a friend? Journal? Keep trying things until you find what works for you.

 

[TakeActionNow]

I came home after a very, very exhausting week away and I succumbed. I had nothing left in the tank, in terms of defences. I was and am quite exhausted. I thought I had this. I was feeling great. I am not sure how to handle coping with something as challenging as a day eight while feeling such intense fatigue. Any advice? It was an anomalous week. I won't be so busy for a long time.

Thanks for reading!

@42&Hopeful

Treat everything as they are naturally:
Tired? Rest
Energetic? Run
Agitated? Walk
Bored? Go out
Thirsty? Drink
Hungry? Eat
Sleepy? Sleep

Simplify your life and do the appropriate activities that restore natural balance.

Sex only happens when you have a partner physically with you who is also interested. Otherwise, throw that thought out of the window.

Good luck!

 

[42&Hopeful]

@42&Hopeful

Treat everything as they are naturally:
Tired? Rest
Energetic? Run
Agitated? Walk
Bored? Go out
Thirsty? Drink
Hungry? Eat
Sleepy? Sleep

Simplify your life and do the appropriate activities that restore natural balance.

Sex only happens when you have a partner physically with you who is also interested. Otherwise, throw that thought out of the window.

Good luck!

Thanks! Your advice is refreshingly practical. I can get behind it!

 

[42&Hopeful]

Day 1

Today was a good day. I still feel tired from the week I left behind, but I am starting to feel a smidge more recharged.

The week ahead appears busy, but not stressful. I got this.

Thanks for reading! And I appreciate the hell out of the support I am getting from all of you!

 

[42&Hopeful]

I did not have a good weekend!

The fatigue that followed last week's busy work schedule - travelling, presenting, and repeat - was a real challenge for me. I had no fuel in the tank. I was stressed about all the other work I missed as a result of my travels and I was physically and mentally tired. One of my businesses is dealing with a growth spurt and a fellow shareholder and I are going through a rough patch. All of this, combined with some missed and nascent deadlines, made for a weekend spent wallowing in a PMO fog I could not get out of.

I was doing quite well before this latest bout. I had relapsed a few times, but I was, over all, feeling stronger. And I was starting to feel as though I was making sense of things.

What get me now is this: I will be busy again. I will have more weeks like my previous one. I don't yet have a good system for knowing how to anticipate and prepare for the fatigue that comes after an intensely busy spell. Any advice?

I am sorry for the roller coaster. I feel as though I let my supporters down.

That said, I am now ready to continue along a healing trajectory.

Thanks for reading!

 

[Androg]

One step at a time. And if you MO don't binge. "When you're in a hole, the first thing to do is to stop digging."

 

[TakeActionNow]

The prevention method is
1. Plan for the day
2. Don't distract and just do according to plan
3. Recognize every achievement along the way
4. Have a really good dinner to recognize and reward myself, and round off the day.

The reason for pent up desire:
1. Sometimes we're just over energized like a tired child and need to vent
2. we didn't recognize or reward ourselves for accomplishment made during the day, so we feel drained and unfulfilled
3. we didn't do much for the day and again need that boost to feel better. In this case it's our own fault

As long as we care and recognize ourselves across the day, and be fair and equitable with ourselves, we should be fine.

It helps to have a think what is motivating you to M.
Get to the psychological root of the motive so that you can correctly address it.

 

[Nico]

I did not have a good weekend!

The fatigue that followed last week's busy work schedule - travelling, presenting, and repeat - was a real challenge for me. I had no fuel in the tank. I was stressed about all the other work I missed as a result of my travels and I was physically and mentally tired. One of my businesses is dealing with a growth spurt and a fellow shareholder and I are going through a rough patch. All of this, combined with some missed and nascent deadlines, made for a weekend spent wallowing in a PMO fog I could not get out of.

I was doing quite well before this latest bout. I had relapsed a few times, but I was, over all, feeling stronger. And I was starting to feel as though I was making sense of things.

What get me now is this: I will be busy again. I will have more weeks like my previous one. I don't yet have a good system for knowing how to anticipate and prepare for the fatigue that comes after an intensely busy spell. Any advice?

I am sorry for the roller coaster. I feel as though I let my supporters down.

That said, I am now ready to continue along a healing trajectory.

Thanks for reading!

No need for apologies mate - we have all been there! All our efforts have value and we learn from what we got right and what triggers using. I made a list of triggers or states which make PMO likely, and created a list of strategies and distractions. Fatigue is a really difficult one - I get thiis a lot, and because defences and motivation are down, i like to do something else that's pleasant and relaxing - guided relaxations or hypnosis work for me (loads on youtube) My advice is just keep trying, read threads to see how others manage it, and focus on who you want to become.

 

[Nico]

Also - a nice bath can help, and failing anything else I just distract myself if I need to with a good tv show or novel!

 

[42&Hopeful]

Also - a nice bath can help, and failing anything else I just distract myself if I need to with a good tv show or novel!

Thanks for this! I really like the idea of generating a list of triggers, along with strategies/distractions. I have been tracking my days in a spreadsheet full of columns and categories and I will be adding these to it. Thanks!

 

[42&Hopeful]

Day 1

Today has been an okay day. I did not get a lot done and I had trouble focusing. That said, I did not PMO. For that, I am grateful.

I also managed to add some fields to the spreadsheet I use to track the details of my good days and the details associated with my relapses. I added triggers and strategies columns, under each of which I have begun adding information. I do believe that a keener eye on determining and documenting the circumstances leading up to my relapses will be a valuable resource for getting through the difficult day seven, day eight malaise.

Thanks for reading and thanks for your support!

 

[42&Hopeful]

Day 2

Things have started to turn around today. I am still feeling a bit unproductive and lethargic, but I did manage to muster some focus and I did manage to strike a few things off of a fairly long to-do list. And, I did not PMO.

I am interested in my current slump. I am not sure what brought it on. I may have been pushing myself too hard over the last few months, but I'm also curious about whether I often go through something similar every year at this time.

Regardless, I am grateful for my many successes today. I did things that took strength. The mental clarity was not there, but I do believe it's not far away. Tomorrow is another day.

Thanks for reading!

 

[TakeActionNow]

Learning to live with and endure discomfort is important. But so too is balance. An excess of one requires a counter. That is healthy self care. Do find a healthy counter. A good dinner, bath, evening walks all help to wind down the day.