Reclamation
Member
I'm 29 now. I've attempted more reboots than I can count. I realise now, I need to address the root:
I get powerful cravings and easily triggered during reboot. There's no shame in sexuality or wanting sex. But I need time to work out what's natural and okay, and what's harmful and excessive. What's conditioned and what's normal. I don't know what fully healthy desire looks like in this area until I give this all up for some time. What's more important than sex is survival and being alive. Sex is about reproducing more humans because what's more important is life and living. But also intimate connection. And that's an important part of being alive too which porn could only ever provide the illusion of. Porn to sex is like junk food to nutritious natural food.
Primarliy becuase of dopamine, I've also developed interests in:
Meditation helps with all of these.
- CPTSD and reparenting - Fawning and bottled emotion + traumas - Chronic shame - Emptiness
- Neurodivergence: ADHD, rejection sensitivity, SPS, dysregulation, nervous system, shyness, quietness and mutism. Living simpler
- Deep nondual transcendent purpose/seeking/enquiry, goals, interests, hobbies and mindfulness. Recovery as a spritual journey - Finitude
- Connection/community and support/treatment
- Self-care: Intake, body, rest and hygeine
- New attitudes towards: Healthy sexuality (Porn, Women, Masculinity, Sexualised traumas) and Tech (digital minimalism)
- Dopamine mechanisms and natural rewards: Seeking itself is the addiction, not just consumption, this is important- Rewire to real partner
I get powerful cravings and easily triggered during reboot. There's no shame in sexuality or wanting sex. But I need time to work out what's natural and okay, and what's harmful and excessive. What's conditioned and what's normal. I don't know what fully healthy desire looks like in this area until I give this all up for some time. What's more important than sex is survival and being alive. Sex is about reproducing more humans because what's more important is life and living. But also intimate connection. And that's an important part of being alive too which porn could only ever provide the illusion of. Porn to sex is like junk food to nutritious natural food.
Primarliy becuase of dopamine, I've also developed interests in:
- Homosexual and trans encounters
- Voyeurism
- Vicarious enjoyment: Learning what women are into, watching what they like to rexperience it
- Swinging and other group acitivities
- Casual sex
- The kink scene
- Cuckolding
- Open relationships
- Older women
- Escorts and similar services
Meditation helps with all of these.
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