Leonidas
Active Member
Back again after a prolonged absence. I wish I weren't, but I guess it's the nature of bad habits: they will keep returning unless other habits were successfully cultivated to replace the maladaptive. There are probably an assortment of methods that can help with the patterns of addiction, but I don't think it's worthwhile for me to try them all or to formulate my own. Already in my mid-40's, I realize life is short: I am not in the shape I used to be, sometimes I feel misgivings about an internal organ or other, and between now and a 'healthy' end of life, anything can happen to cut it short by way of accident, cancer, heart disease or even abject poverty.
I don't want to inspire a feeling of impeding catastrophe for my own life.. but on the other hand, I'd like to deal with life events as they come, as awful as they may be, and hopefully finally tune in to a life philosophy that embraces balance, moderation, pleasure in the simplest experiences, respect for others but also a will to follow my own path free of limits imposed from without. Somewhere, I now the answer is there. We probably have the answer waiting patiently for us to uncover the cloud to reveal what was there all along. I see my return to writing on the forum as resuming my efforts to "remove the clouds".
Part of me wants to count days. Another part of me couldn't care less. Which one to trust? In the absence of a clear winner, I'll pick the lesser ego approach and NOT count days. I don't want to make this about sparking some pride in PMO-free marathon runs... my prime objective is clarity. Answering the 'why' I turn to the habit, what I'm escaping from, what I'm trying to resolve, what I'm compensating for. And then hopefully getting in the 'replacement' therapy: engaging in better habits.
That's all for now. Until the next thought process.
I don't want to inspire a feeling of impeding catastrophe for my own life.. but on the other hand, I'd like to deal with life events as they come, as awful as they may be, and hopefully finally tune in to a life philosophy that embraces balance, moderation, pleasure in the simplest experiences, respect for others but also a will to follow my own path free of limits imposed from without. Somewhere, I now the answer is there. We probably have the answer waiting patiently for us to uncover the cloud to reveal what was there all along. I see my return to writing on the forum as resuming my efforts to "remove the clouds".
Part of me wants to count days. Another part of me couldn't care less. Which one to trust? In the absence of a clear winner, I'll pick the lesser ego approach and NOT count days. I don't want to make this about sparking some pride in PMO-free marathon runs... my prime objective is clarity. Answering the 'why' I turn to the habit, what I'm escaping from, what I'm trying to resolve, what I'm compensating for. And then hopefully getting in the 'replacement' therapy: engaging in better habits.
That's all for now. Until the next thought process.