Zero to One -Daily journal

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Clouds&Dirt

Active Member
I've been doing pretty well. I don't remember what day I am on and I actually enjoy not having the mental weight of a "number" in my head all the time. Anyways, Ive been having bad urges recently and have come here for the support of the forums. I feel I am more resilient to urges when I write here, so that's what I'll be doing for a while

-Clouds&Dirt
 
Blondie

Blondie

Respected Member
Nice job on refraining @Clouds&Dirt. Stay strong with those urges. Remember, it might seem impossible at some points, but then only a few minutes or hours later, it will have completely passed and you'll scratch your head wondering why it seemed so impossible just a moment ago. Thinking long term is a beautiful thing. Unfortunately for many of us here, it's a process we have to relearn, but we can!

Best
 
C

Clouds&Dirt

Active Member
Blondie said:
Nice job on refraining @Clouds&Dirt. Stay strong with those urges. Remember, it might seem impossible at some points, but then only a few minutes or hours later, it will have completely passed and you'll scratch your head wondering why it seemed so impossible just a moment ago. Thinking long term is a beautiful thing. Unfortunately for many of us here, it's a process we have to relearn, but we can!

Best
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Thanks for this Blondie 🙏
 
chap

chap

Active Member
keep it up @Clouds&Dirt this has given me motivation to hope back on here. i lost a lot of motivation and conviction these last couple days/weeks, so i am reminded i am not alone in this! don't give in, do something else! enrich your life, king!
 
C

Clouds&Dirt

Active Member
I'm currently doing very well and am on one of the best streaks of my life. With that said, I experienced some serious urges today and did not break! I was literally talking to myself in the mirror saying "you don't actually want to do this" trying to talk myself out of the urges.

Anyway, instead of just coming here after a defeat I figured I'd come here to celebrate a victory.

-Clouds&Dirt
 
C

Clouds&Dirt

Active Member
Dang, back to Day 1

Had a pretty rough week last week, not a great start to the year. I'm just gonna act like THIS week is the new-year and properly kick my resolutions into gear

-Clouds&Dirt
 
C

Clouds&Dirt

Active Member
Day 5

Starting to feel some mild urges. Recognizing them for what they are, and choosing not to engage with them

Another day without porn

-Clouds&Dirt
 
C

Clouds&Dirt

Active Member
Day 6

I forgot to write yesterday, so writing now. Still doing fairly well. My new routine fell apart a little at the end of the week. I had made a schedule for myself that is extremely productive but has zero slack. Meaning if I decide to sit down and relax for even 15 minutes, something in the schedule is getting messed up. This is unrealistic, so I'll find a way to work some "cushion" time into the schedule.

Also, I spent a few minutes going down a rabbit hole of thirst traps yesterday. Need to get refocused otherwise something like that could lead to a bigger relapse

-Clouds&Dirt
 
C

Clouds&Dirt

Active Member
Day 1

Kept peeking and slipped in. Felt pretty bad about it. Notice how I didn't write yesterday? It's like clockwork, when I start to slip, all of my good habits get dropped, including writing in this journal. I didn't write on Sunday, and I relapsed on Monday. I had this under control for a couple of months and now I'm back to relapsing every week. What happened?
I'm getting right back up but damn, I'm tired of falling

Onwards

-Clouds&Dirt
 
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