Yes I Can!

bob

Respected Member
Thought I provide and update.

I have made it 8 days so far with no MO and definitely on PMO. The MO continues to be the most difficult. Today I went out and exercised and worked around the house. Always seems like there is something that can be done. Lots of things I have put off in the past. Maybe the elimination of M will help get more done.

Still wake up with a strong hard-on but waiting for my first wet dream. If I have one it would actually be my first. Started MO at a young age; before I was able to produce any semen. First time I MO and something came out I was kind of scared. Wasn't sure what was happening. I have keep sufficiently drained ever since.

Crazy I know but I'm in my late 50's and  I never had a wet dream.
 

bob

Respected Member
Today has been difficult. Desperately wanted to MO but have refrained. Will make it through but I seem to be going around in a fog. Need to get out and do something else to take my mind off these thoughts.

Need to remember that this is my brains process of rebooting. Hard though.
 

hoopvol

Active Member
Hi Bob,
The titel of your journal says so: you can do this! Does your wife know you're struggling right now? Talk to her; by talking to her, especialy when you're having a hard time, you make her part of your "team".
Keep strong, you can do this!
 

hopeful

Member
Come on Bob, stay strong. You fought this one, that should make you feel better.you're right to keep mind busy with something else.
It works good for me. How's your exercise going?
 

bob

Respected Member
Hoopvol,

We had actually planned on making love today. At least I thought we were. I mentioned it a couple of times; had a  positive response but she needed to finish up what she was working on for work. Her work kind of got away from her so we never did. Its hard to bounce back into a different mindset when I think I am going to have sex. Seems to be on my mind constantly. I guess that's why I am having a hard time.

Really wanted to have some physical contact. Even just cuddling would have been nice. Maybe tomorrow. Sunday seems like it is a good time for us.


Hopeful,

OK, strong it is...

Kind of fell away from the exercise this week. Went two times but the first time I pushed it too hard. Haven't done a regular  program in a long time so I need to start slow. The second session was much better. Gave me a sense of how far I could push it. Feel like it won't be too much of a problem to get back into it.

Thanks for asking.

I sure helps when I know you guys are out there.
 

hoopvol

Active Member
Hi Bob,
Sunday sure sounds like a good day.  ;).. See were the day takes you and create a relaxed atmosphere. Did she know you were planning to make love today? Maybe, if you don't plan, but get her in the right mood.... If you don't plan, you won't get dissapointed? I understand, why this must be why P is such a trap: you don't have to seduce it, it's alway there. But you know: p is no langer an option.
Stay strong, you' re doing great!
 

sodonewithit

Active Member
Having self induced expectations of sex is something all guys do.  It hurts in more ways than we see but I think we have to attempt to mitigate them.  A long time ago a shrink my wife and I saw mentioned this to me which I took to heart:  alot of the conversations we have inside our heads are two way hut we fill in for the other party.  Sometimes the replies are good but most often not.  We have to allow that actual person to speak and not discuss such matters alone.

This can apply to alot of aspects of life but it's something which I have really been trying to do over this last half year since Ijjoined the movement.  I wish and hope that one day I'll be brave enough to speak fully about everything but this takes time, trust of yourself and others. 

As for working out dropping the porn is amazing.  I can now bench 135 with ease, leg presses are hitting 360 curls, curls are straight 30, shoulder press at 125 and dumbbell presses are 55 each hand.  I'm sure that my one rep max is far above these numbers but we are all old and I worry about hurting myself.  My wife and I go dancing here and there to electronic dance music events, something we have both enjoyed for a few decades, and we can keep up with the 20 year old kids and so can everyone else here(though we are the oldest kids in the room)
 

hoopvol

Active Member
Hi Bob,

Was just thinking about you two, wondering how you are doing now?
Hope you are still going strong?? You are a great inspiration for a lot of guys! And you give hope to partners als well.
Keep up the good work!
 

bob

Respected Member
Ohh Hoopvol,

I am currently struggling with strong desires to M as it has been almost 11 days since the last time I O. That is an extremely long time for me. MO has been a part of my life for almost 50 years. It is a hard habit to break.

I have things (work and personal life) that is taking me away from my relationship with my wife and it is difficult to maintain a clear mind throughout this process.

I continue on the quest.
 

bob

Respected Member
RN Update:

Working on 12 days without a O. Man, this is a long time. Porn (typical hard core) hasn't been a problem. Porn substitutes are calling but I haven't answered. The challenge is keeping my hands off myself and not M or M to O.

Proud of myself but it is more difficult than I can imagine.

 

Jimbo

Active Member
I hear ya Bob. For me the M is the tough part too. Keep strong! Only good things will happen. But not immediately. That's the tough part to comprehend and believe in. I have noticed some drastic changes in my body and mind while being off of M, even in a short time period. Sadly, I have M'd since my time here and almost immediately noticed the progress made was set back.

I reject the man (for lack of better word) I was. I will be the MAN I know I can be!
 

sodonewithit

Active Member
It sems that everyone has this slip once or twice before they realize it's filled with danger.  I think we fool ourselves into feeling the risk is with porn alone but deep down we know it's the release.  I guess experience is the difference.
 

jstock

Active Member
I have m'ed a couple  of times. I'm using my imagination, rather  than looking at a screen. It only took a minute or so. I'd like to use p. I'm retraining my brain.
 

hoopvol

Active Member
Hi Bob,

good job, man! I always told my husband I didn't have any problems with him M-ing. He told me himself, he wants to stay away from it because it would be the the first step back on a slippery slope. It's just too related to P. Something he learned from you! Lesson learned!


 
N

notgivinup

Guest
Hey Bob.....thanks for your encouragement. I'm really glad you're here.

Thanks.
NGU
 

bob

Respected Member
Just checking in.

Kind of depressed. Not sure why. Went on a trip and realized the number of triggers while present on the road. It seems like they are absolutely everywhere. I know this process hasn't gone on forever but it sure seems like it.

Not sure how to react or what to do. I just want this all to stop. I want this all to end.
 

Brooklyn Jerry

Active Member
I hope you have been able to stay off the porn. I sure know how tough it is to beat this thing.  I  have slipped a few times and found doing so made having real not as enjoyable. I do know that one thing that keeps me trying to quit is the knowledge that when I stay away from porn and MO the real,sex is better.
 

bob

Respected Member
Nope, no porn for me. At least none that is in the traditional sense.

I did stop into an adult "novelty" store. Walked in, walked around, and I walked out. Total time in the store about 45 seconds. But, I haven't viewed porn since May 6th.

Still working on cravings for MO though. It was through a MO marathon that I reset my current counter. Still struggling with that part of my life.

Would like to be done with these cravings and to be able to keep myself active; actually doing things when I am by myself. Currently, I just shut down. Have lots to do but it doesn't seem to get done.

Still working on it...
 

bob

Respected Member
So glad to have RN so I can post when I get any urges to MO.

Just got home. Need to work on dinner or working in the yard. The typical feelings start. At least I have the RN options. If I spend a lot of time here at least I am not resetting. It is still a struggle.

Thanks for being here guys.

To the folks that read and wonder...  If you are contemplating a commitment to a PMO free life, you need to be here as well.
  • Joint the group.
  • Start a journal.
  • Begin to post.
Its hard but it is worth it. You need to join us.

 
Top