Viper said:jkkk said:If any guys have any techniques that you can share on how to deall with it, please do. What works for you? I now have the "Porn Doc" answers, so I know where to start (I started already the two-second rule, just without two seconds, now I'll stick to those two seconds), but any tips will be appreciated.
And yes, the feminine input - priceless.
Here is an exercise you should try because it's good that you admit you have a problem. I'm in the same
boat so hear me out;
The next time you're at the mall and please make sure you have a constructive reason to go and when
you're there, focus on the men. Take in their mannerisms and behavior. Forget about the ladies and
just notice men. When I say notice, I'm not suggesting starring at their crotch. I want you to observe
other oglers in this target rich environment. You will see how bad they look and how awful it is.
Essentially, what you see is yourself in action and you will be disgusted to think that you look just
as awful when you do it yourself.
You will learn that other men out there do what you do. The purpose of this is to be inspired to behave
I remember standing in line at Chipotle the other night. This dude in front me kept leering at this PYT
at the end of the line. It was so obvious because he had to turn around to do it. His body language
pretty much said it all. Now if you get a quick glance when she walked in, that's fine, quick glance and
back to facing in front of you. But he kept turning around and he might as well be salivating. It looks bad
and you don't want that for yourself.
I do have a serious problem. I always admitted PMO problem but I think that for years I did not have the balls to admit this. And this is an equally important problem. Or actually - the same problem as PMO (like its a PMO-subcategory, so to speak, or just another sex addiction behaviour).
Thanks a lot! Watching men. I will try Sound like a great exercise. I think not only because I could see how they behave, but this just sound like a brilliant exercise to keep focusing on something else.
Two things work well for me at the moment:
1. only one look for two seconds rule
2. realizing that she's not there for me / not dressing for me -> I think the power of that realization is that it hits the "Master of the Universe" myth on the head. I certainly have that issue.
chicken said:It is amazing how PMO has changed my out look towards women...I grew up in a normal family with a sister and always saw women for what they really are, equal but different. After years of porn use, I guess my views changed without my thinking about it or really realizing it until I became aware of my addiction. PMO has led me to objectify women and see any attractive woman as a potential lust object, not for the person they really are. What a horrible transformation. This addiction goes much deeper then I first realized. Now I am having to rewire my brain from the dopamine and other chemicals as well as change my habits and attitudes towards the female gender. I attribute a lot to the constant novelty aspect of this addiction, I had become a scanner of crowds, without even realizing I was doing it, I could pick out an woman who is attractive or revealingly attired quick as a wink. I am on my way to stopping this ridiculous behavior. There is nobody who I would rather have by my side then the woman I live with, so why continue to "hunt".
I'm 100% in the same situation - couldn't use better words to describe it. It really is comforting to know that one is not alone.
"Now I am having to rewire my brain from the dopamine and other chemicals as well as change my habits and attitudes towards the female gender." -> I actually really think that those habits and attitudes that so profoundly affects are just part of the addiction. Watching women, hunting, releases the dopamine and imbalances our brains from the chemical point of view. We might not watch P, but it is of no use if we keep letting ourselves to substitute it with scanning crowds. That what I think. This sh** seems "innocent", yet its no better than watching P - I would even go that far.