Relapse

[macondo]

Last week was tremendously stressful, I had three high profile presentations, and had to prepare. At the beginning of the week, I watched porn for the first time in a month and eventually PMO'd. The act while it happened felt great actually, I was very sensative and had a strong orgasm. I did this for a few days to handle the tremendous anxiety from the presentation, and then stopped, ashamed.

Then it hit, a girl I'd been seeing stopped over to hang out, and I couldn't get it up at all. It feels like I've flat lined hard, we tried again yesterday, and same result. It. Feels. Horrible. So I'm starting over, this time no edging, no anything that isn't the real thing. I also went into my windows/drivers/ect/host file and set it up so I can't open any porn sites.

Question for Gabe or anybody else: After a relapse, how long does it take to catch back up? Is it harder or quicker because of the previous No FAP exp? Thanks.

#ashamed #frustrated #embarassed #thissucks

 

[bzarfas]

Then it hit, a girl I'd been seeing stopped over to hang out, and I couldn't get it up at all. It feels like I've flat lined hard, we tried again yesterday, and same result. It. Feels. Horrible. So I'm starting over, this time no edging, no anything that isn't the real thing. I also went into my windows/drivers/ect/host file and set it up so I can't open any porn sites.

Oh man, I know what you feel like.  I had a big test a long ago, came home and my girl stopped by and wanted some attention that I had not been giving her, but since I took care of myself(PMO) + collapsed after the stress from preparing for the exam, I couldnt do anything.

This was a common occurrence (me PMO, she coming over for some Os) in our relationship,  things ended shortly afterwards.()addiction to PMO was so hard to break, but I didnt blame myself, I blamed her)

Until I took accountability for my own actions, I would never got better.

Take back control man, make a goal, right it down, and then don't let yourself try to justify any excuse to break that goal.

If it does happen, learn from the lesson, and get back on the horse to reach your goal.

 

[macondo]

Thanks Bzarfas, yeah, I think I got cocky, because I did no PMO for like a month, and was a beast, got my libido back, had strong erections, and thought I was all right. Then this project happened, had a ton of anxiety, relapsed, and FLATLINE. I'm making a stronger committment now, def no PMO, maybe even no M or O, learned my lesson.