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Day fuckin ZERO!!! :mad: Relapsed again today

Relapsed again on day 3... Everything is in shambles. I have 1 last day of work before a week of vacation, I can't wait to chill a little bit (if I can, I'm in a constant state of anxiety and panic). I have to change the cases to some CDs and travel a little bit. You know what's ridiculous? I...

Thanks, man. I appreciate the support.

It would be a lie to say I am super motivated now to do this. I'm absolutely discouraged and depressed.

3 days in a row of PMO relapses... Alcohol relapse yesterday after about a week of sobriety. And I'm still tempted to PMO, after 3 days of relapsing, it's absolutely ridiculous.

relapsed again today. This god damn addiction continues to have complete control over myself.

Relapsed on day 3. Sad and lost.

Feeling lethargic, low dopamine and shit... Day 1 but I'm fuckin tired, man.

Yes, of course, it's not going to be easy but you got this, you're too far to go back now.

:love: Really well done brother. You got this, This time is different.

Relapsed again on day 2

I guess the only good thing from all those 3 relapses in one day is that, at least, I didn't do or say anything ridiculous while under the influence of alcohol. I didn't send any stupid messages, I didn't write anything ridiculous here. But everything else is shit.

The sad thing about this, when it comes to me, is that I do it trying to feel great. This has been an obsession of mine for ten years. I want to feel great when I use my drugs, I want it to be worth it and when I end up not having that much fun, it's absolutely bullshit. It's about wasting a...

Relapsed again. I had caffeine and alcohol relapse yesterday too, after 2 weeks of abstinence. What surprised me is that I got a bottle of vodka, expecting to knock me out cold and it didn't happen. I got less drunk that I'd thought I should've after 2 weeks. In 1 second of weakness you can fuck...

binge...

relapse

2 days

Day 1 I relapsed yesterday. I actually relapsed 3 days in a row and now I have all the low dopamine symptoms that you could read about. I don't know, I don't get it. I know the state I transport myself in after relapsing but I still do it anyway, keeping in mind the misery doesn't seem to...

Well, yes, given my past maybe 6 months, 7 days is a big thing, as pathetic as this sounds cause 7 days is terrible streak. It's too small.

I'm not doing better. Still heavily invested in porn and PMO. Relapsed 3 days in a row. I have this low dopamine feeling; lethargy, high anxiety, overthinking and all that. I'm fuckin trapped, I can't escape this shit. Maybe what I know is that I don't know shit. Maybe I actually don't know how...