I decided one day at university to top fapping (and this was before i knew anything about no fap, reboot nation etc) for no reason in particular. Up until that point I had developed some social anxiety and low mood states (definitely not helped by all the booze etc). I edged quite a lot and managed to get to 32 days I decided to stop. My boners were rock hard and my orgasms were amazing for a short time after that. During those 32 days I felt like a machine, unbelievable elation, confidence, quickness of thought, ease around people and ease with myself. I did not attribute this influx in positive emotions with my nofap and just thought my body had decided to stop being so negative for no reason in particular. I didn't want to over analyse it and wasn't determined to find what cause the change, I was just happy that there was a change and that I wasn't experiencing anxiety and low mood states. On day 32 I had an exceptionally bad "restoration to normality" shall we say from a heavy night out and decided to alleviate my condition with a fap. After that I stopped trying to abstain and continued the way I had been prior to my abstinence. I eventually returned to my unsure, anxious, low mood and irritable self (I can't remember how long it actually took as I am writing from recall and all this happened about 2 years ago) but did not make the connection between my return to fapping. My mood state got pretty bad at one point, probably due to stress of 4th year and my final year dissertation. I struggled through and am now in a lot better place considering how bad my head space, thoughts, emotions and general feel of my body goes.
That being said I am still no-where near the place I used to be prior to University or what I would deem content. Still not great at making connections with people, lacking inner confidence, slow as fuck when it comes to thought processes and decision making, numb to a lot of things. Definitely a case of coping as opposed to thriving and can relate a lot of what I am feeling to desensitaization.
I have made several half arsed attempts at no-fap but the best I could muster was a 10 day streak. However now I am trying to make a concentrated effort to abstain from PMO for life and MO for 3 months (to the displeasure (literally) of my girlfriend).
I am on Day 3:
Feeling good, more energy than normal, words come easier to me yet I still jumble over myself at times when I talk, a bit lighter in the head, motivation is coming a little easier, happier.
Gym:
Chest, Tri's
Food: Porridge, smoothie, green tea.
Orange
Chicken Mayo sandwiches x2,
Salad
Tofu, veg, chickpea curry
Lots of Pate
Lots of Water
Meditataion:
20 mins
That being said I am still no-where near the place I used to be prior to University or what I would deem content. Still not great at making connections with people, lacking inner confidence, slow as fuck when it comes to thought processes and decision making, numb to a lot of things. Definitely a case of coping as opposed to thriving and can relate a lot of what I am feeling to desensitaization.
I have made several half arsed attempts at no-fap but the best I could muster was a 10 day streak. However now I am trying to make a concentrated effort to abstain from PMO for life and MO for 3 months (to the displeasure (literally) of my girlfriend).
I am on Day 3:
Feeling good, more energy than normal, words come easier to me yet I still jumble over myself at times when I talk, a bit lighter in the head, motivation is coming a little easier, happier.
Gym:
Chest, Tri's
Food: Porridge, smoothie, green tea.
Orange
Chicken Mayo sandwiches x2,
Salad
Tofu, veg, chickpea curry
Lots of Pate
Lots of Water
Meditataion:
20 mins