My beloved porn

[Jojje112]

The hardest part is saying goodbye to something you love.

Farewell my beloved pornography. You whom I loved and hated and was like a fiery mistress. Now it is over, now it's finally over, now enough is enough, I have no feeling left for you anymore. I've loved you everywhere on this earth, you have been the most ardent and most horny lover I've ever had. But it is perhaps not surprising, you've made ??me blind to everything else in life. We have lived together for almost twenty years and it's been a stormy relationship. I can not take it anymore, I have to start thinking about myself. If you and I continue to live together, I will die, but you'll get by without me. You made me blind to everything that did not fit you, you decided over my choices. Not just sometimes, but always - always.

Therefore, my beloved, I say farewell. And - despite all evil - thanks also for the good. Thank you for not hurt me much worse than you could have done. You took almost everything.......

 

[qrayzHD]

I think you will love life without porn 100x more, maybe you will even start to despise it, there is nothing that porn does that is good for anyone.

 

[Fappy]

Yeah! Give that filthy slut called porn a kick up the arse! Kick her out on the street into the gutter where she belongs. Plenty of rats and slimy beasts out there she can attach herself to.
Kill her so you can live!

 

[skyclad]

Wow, I just deleted all my porn over the last few days.  I couldnt believe how hard it was.  Your right ill miss her but she is very bad for me..  I needed to see your post, thabks bud!!
Good luck to you!!

 

[Jojje112]

19 days in now and it is killing me....it's really tuff with the cravings.
All my family members are home and thats good because otherwise I probably relapsed by now.

 

[jkkk]

Keep it up, Jojje, you're doing great!

 

[Chaos Mind]

19 days in now and it is killing me....it's really tuff with the cravings.
All my family members are home and thats good because otherwise I probably relapsed by now.

No one ever undestands how hard it can be. Intentions are good at the beginning. Saying goodbye is easy. But keeping it up, while porn is EVERYWHERE you go, that's the hard part. You're doing a good job. You did not avoid a relapse due your family...but because you said goodbye already. And goodbye is goodbye. You're strong because you want to be and need to be. The success is yours!

I used to watch porn on streaming sites. But I still have some pictures and I am going to delete them now. It's a good idea. Goodbye there!

---
Update: interesting! Deleting the files was no problem at all. But following the path of directories to the hidden files...made me shiver.

 

[markol]

I have recently delted about 600gb of material 

But is now gone forever 

 

[qrayzHD]

Good on you markol, that is a massive step. Best of luck for 2015.

 

[Jojje112]

It was a long time for me since a kept porn on the disc.
resently i use to just go to streamsites.

Good that you deleted your porn. A step in the right direction.

 

[Poker]

Gentlemen.....  do not put in all this effort to make yourselves better, and throw it away down the road.  You're better than that, and deserve better than that. 

Cheers!

p.

 

[MarkL]

I recently felt the same thing when I deleted all of my porn - It's quite incredible how attached you can become to little files on the computer!

Don't know about you, but I must have hovered over that little "empty recycle bin" icon for a good 10 minutes before finally plucking up the courage to press it!

Definitely the best step though, the more triggers we can get rid of, the sooner we will succeed...

 

[Fappy]

The lengths we went to to cover up our filthy little habits. Our brains came up with some pretty deceptive tricks to hide porn. All that time wasted trying to figure out the best ways to conceal it so no one ever finds it.
It really possesses people doesnt it. 

 

[AoMSentMe]

This is a good thread. I was in a similar position - had lots of images saved, and like all my files, backed up as well (I'm an IT guy, I backup everything.) And in a sense, I too was in love with my collection, and was very proud of it as it had been hard work finding some of the images and sorting them. It sounds stupid, but it really was hard to delete all that, as I'm sure it was for all of you. Congrats to anyone who has done it!

A few months ago, during one my attempts to squash my addiction, I deleted my collection of porn images, reran my backups so the files would be gone from those as well, and destroyed a copy I made on a DVD-ROM (yes, I make a lot of backups.) It was not easy to do, but I knew it was necessary to put an end to this. And guess what? a few weeks later, I found a backup I had forgotten about, which had a fairly complete copy of my porn folder on it, and I restored it and relapsed. Sigh.

I deleted everything again a couple weeks ago, and though I've PMO'd, I have avoided building a new collection. There is only one backup that may still have a very incomplete porn folder on it, but I plan to fix that very soon. There's no way at this point I could rebuilt the collection to the level it was at before without ALOT of work, and I have too much else to do. So I hope this will be a motivator in quitting porn for good as my collection was always an important part of it.

 

[Poker]

That's to bad my friend.....  but lesson learned.  No matter how far down the road to recovery we travel, you're always the same distance from the ditch.  You're working too hard on this not to succeed.  I Know you can do this.

Be strong my friend.

Cheers.

p.

 

[shutemdwn]

I used to save porn then I realized I could just "favorite" the scenes I liked on my favorite site. I thought about deleting my account on that site but I know I'm not strong enough to log in to do it. If I log into that site even with good intentions I'm going to PMO without a doubt. Oh well, at least it's not on my computer. Gonna do this one day at a time.

 

[Chaos Mind]

If I log into that site even with good intentions I'm going to PMO without a doubt. Oh well, at least it's not on my computer.

When saying that, you admit that IT controles YOU. This process is all about reverting this relation! YOU are the boss. YOU decide when your hands unzip your pants and when you log onto the site to delete your account you simply are not going to PMO. This is a decision! You are the one who makes the decision. Have a little more trust in your power. IT cannot win. You do.

Log onto the site. Look at the pictures in disgust. Shake your head, delete the account. Celebrate here with us, bro!

 

[AoMSentMe]

I used to save porn then I realized I could just "favorite" the scenes I liked on my favorite site. I thought about deleting my account on that site but I know I'm not strong enough to log in to do it. If I log into that site even with good intentions I'm going to PMO without a doubt. Oh well, at least it's not on my computer. Gonna do this one day at a time.

I was in a similar situation - even after deleting everything locally, I still had an account on an image sharing site where I'd fave'd many of the images I had deleted. And too many times, when I got the itch, I found myself on that website because I knew it was there. I finally logged in one day, and quick as I could found the page to delete my account and did it. It was too much of a temptation - it needed to go!

 

[AoMSentMe]

That's to bad my friend.....  but lesson learned.  No matter how far down the road to recovery we travel, you're always the same distance from the ditch.  You're working too hard on this not to succeed.  I Know you can do this.

Be strong my friend.

Cheers.

p.

Thank you! One of my goals this week is to make sure that all the backups are absolutely gone so this can't happen again.

 

[shutemdwn]

If I log into that site even with good intentions I'm going to PMO without a doubt. Oh well, at least it's not on my computer.

When saying that, you admit that IT controles YOU. This process is all about reverting this relation! YOU are the boss. YOU decide when your hands unzip your pants and when you log onto the site to delete your account you simply are not going to PMO. This is a decision! You are the one who makes the decision. Have a little more trust in your power. IT cannot win. You do.

Log onto the site. Look at the pictures in disgust. Shake your head, delete the account. Celebrate here with us, bro!

I appreciate your encouragement, I really do. I've tried that experiment before though. Once I see that page pop up with the rows of new vids ext ext it instantly triggers an uncontrollable urge to PMO. I am also in the twelve step program of AA. We have a saying there: "If you hang out in the barber shop, your going to get a hair cut." I was thinking of having someone do it for me. Just have to find someone I trust to talk to about it.