So after a bona-fide "relapse" I'm here, wondering what the heck happened.
Its really no mystery, it was the same thing that happens before. I had a host of triggers, didn't feel well, got mad at work....I fell. I knew I had been running on a burst of newfound hope and adrenaline, I thought I would be able to set barriers, form new habits and reorganize my life. Obviously I thought wrong, and fell pretty hard.
I went 11+ days without PMO. I know I can do this, but its going to be a fight. After this most recent tryst with porn...I know its worth the fight.
Please don't ever read arrogance or knowing it all into anything I write. I am the lowest of the low. Personally, the undeserved mercy of God is all I can stand in....and that's where I have to start again.
I still love the idea of the reboot. I still stand behind the concepts I've written about. But until I can learn to manage my body in light of all this information, what good is it?
Its really no mystery, it was the same thing that happens before. I had a host of triggers, didn't feel well, got mad at work....I fell. I knew I had been running on a burst of newfound hope and adrenaline, I thought I would be able to set barriers, form new habits and reorganize my life. Obviously I thought wrong, and fell pretty hard.
I went 11+ days without PMO. I know I can do this, but its going to be a fight. After this most recent tryst with porn...I know its worth the fight.
Please don't ever read arrogance or knowing it all into anything I write. I am the lowest of the low. Personally, the undeserved mercy of God is all I can stand in....and that's where I have to start again.
I still love the idea of the reboot. I still stand behind the concepts I've written about. But until I can learn to manage my body in light of all this information, what good is it?